Last Saturday my boyfriend and I played in another scotch doubles tourney.
It was a nightmare!
We lost our first match 0-3. Ouch. Each of us made a few mistakes and so we ended up losing. Our opponents played good against us, but I wish they weren't so talkative while we were at the table, but that's they way pool is sometimes. I firmly believe if we would have won the first game, the outcome would have been different and we would have won the match.
We then "come with it" and win the next two matches decisively. Yay, go team!
But then it happened. Eeeek. We started to argue in our 4th match.
We were both super tired and hadn't had enough sleep the night before (our own fault for playing poker til the wee hours of the morning), but we still should not be arguing.
I don't think my friends had ever seen my boyfriend and I argue before, so to watch us mince words in the middle of a match was prolly weird for them.
Basically, I wasn't thinking right. I went for a few tough shots instead of playing safe, and that frustrated him. When it first happened a couple of times, I really hadn't see the safeties.
He was frustrated with me because he knows I know the game, and he knows I know I'm suppose to play safe at certain times. However, the first couple of times he mentioned "Why didn't you play safe?" the safes hadn't even crossed my mind. That's how I know I wasn't thinking clear. I'll blame it on the lack of sleep, because I'm not sure what else it could have been.
The next big turn at the table in our final match, I see a safe, but then a bank, too. I go for the bank because I think I can make it. As I get down on the shot, I see him cover his eyes in my peripheral vision and I know he's disappointed that I've made the wrong decision, but I go for it anyway.
When I walk back to our chairs after the missed bank, he doesn't even talk to me, which (of course) upsets me. I need encouragement, but I'm not getting it, because he thinks I'm choosing the wrong shots and therefore he's frustrated with me.
He asked me, "why didn't you play safe?"
"I dunno," I reply agitated (nothing like being told you are wrong). "It crossed my mind, but I went for the bank."
We start to have words and argue.
And I try desperately to explain to him that I can't think straight if he gets on to me.
But he is focused on one thing: He pleads with me, "Just go with your first instinct. That's all I'm asking. "
"No buts," he interrupts, "Just go with your first instinct. Okay?"
We are both being stubborn and both frustrated. He's upset with me, and I'm upset he's upset with me (lol). And everyone can see this exchange. Even if you can't hear us, you can tell from our body language we are arguing.
During the next game I try to reverse my anger and say "nice shot" to him a lot so he knows I've moved on from the arguments.
Then it happens. I have to play safe. Ugh. I have only two balls left on the table to try and hide the cueball. I feel pretty good about my decision, but I dog the safe and get mad at myself.
"It's okay, " He tells me as I walk back to our chairs. I snap back embarrassed and ticked off, "I finally play safe and then I dog it!"
He tells me again it's alright, but then........he starts to explain to me what I should have shot instead. I'm so agitated, tho, I tell him firmly, "I don't want to hear it right now in the middle of the match."
"Fine then!" He snaps.
We sit for a few minutes in silence and we both calm down. He then hugs me and says, "Let's stop arguing, we don't do well when we argue."
"Okay," I reply, as I melt a little.
He finally can't keep it to himself anymore. And he again tries to explain which ball I should have played safe on. I just sit there, listening. I finally mumble something.
"What?" He asks me.
"I want to say something but you're gonna get mad," I explain as I look down at the floor.
"Just say it," he pleads with me, suggesting he wont get upset.
He tries to get it out of me, "What?"
I finally say, "Well, my first instinct was to do it the way you are explaining."
"WHAT? OMG Are you serious? You b1tch!" He starts laughing and I start laughing.
"Omg, really?" He asks again while he's cracking up!
"Yes," I say laughing, "I really thought about hitting the 5ball first, but instead I tried to hide behind the 3ball."
We are both laughing so hard we are in tears! It was absolutely hysterical! He couldn't believe it!
As this was going on, the other team made a GREAT out to defeat us 1-3.
We were defending champs of this tourney. And, we haven't placed less than 3rd in ANY scotch event we have played in, so to get 7th SUCKS. lol. No money, either. :(
The other time we got 3rd the same sort of tension was there. All the other times we just played great.
But, it was so wild to go from such strong negative emotions to such great, positive emotions in such a short time frame. It was awesome really!