Surprise Awards

I'm on a new league, a women's league, and I have thoroughly enjoyed it.  I don't normally like leagues, but I have enjoyed this one, mostly because of the camaraderie of my fellow teammates and my competitors.  A lot of these women I have seen at state tournaments or once in a while at other events in the area, but I never really hung out with them.  A few, but not many.  I have enjoyed my new friendships with a lot of the women, and I think with my Mom's passing, this has been very important and healthy for me.

I haven't written about it yet, but my team won the league play offs two weekends ago!  I was SO excited!  I had never won a league playoff before.  And I won the case game, too!  It was a tricky out, to boot.  :)

I also only had one loss the entire weekend.  I'm REALLY not sure how that happened, because I was extremely sick on Sunday.  Saturday I fared well, but by Sunday morning, I had had only ten minutes of sleep the entire night before and my heart rate had been up all morning, and would be up for the rest of the day.  I had too many red bulls the night before (more than I ever have) and that combined with some emotional things almost convinced me to go to the ER instead of league playoffs.  As each hour passed, as each non-sleep passed, I just told myself I had to TRY to get to the pool room that was 30 minutes away and TRY to play pool for my teammates.  We were on the winner's side, about to play in the hotseat match at noon; I had to be there.

But I admit I was miserable.  I drank so much water, I had to pee 2-3 times during each match.  I was shaking and barely able to play pool.  I felt horrible.

I told my teammates if I fainted, "to just wake me up, don't call the paramedics."  One joked she would splash water on me, the other told me she would hit me (because I wouldn't remember it, lol).

As I struggled through the day, I forced myself to play pool for my girls.  I couldn't let them down.  And, we ended up winning!  I had never won a league playoff before!  I finally smiled - first time the entire day, after I sank the winning 8ball and we celebrated with high fives and hugs!

The banquet for the league was the following Thursday.  I called my captain and asked her if I had to be there.  I told her I wasn't feeling well still, but I wasn't sure what the banquet entailed, since this was a new league for me.  Would there be pics?  Discussions?  Was I *really* needed.  She said no, and that an official team pic (with our shirts) were taken over the weekend, but there would be a pic with the trophy (since we just won the playoffs) that I would miss.  I told her since I really gave it my all to show up over the weekend when I was sick, I would like to not go.  She said that was fine.  I didn't feel like I was letting anyone down by not going to the banquet, I more cared about showing up to play the weekend before.

On Friday, I see a photo of my teammates on facebook - we were voted best sportsmanship team!  How cool!  There was a pic with all the ladies,  all my teammates with cute little trophies, minus me of course.  I was so harpy for them!  And then I felt bad I didn't go, but I still had hoped they understood.

Turns out, besides my team award, I won another award.  The day of the banquet, one of the board members had called me because she heard I may not be going.  She was kind of stammering and I couldn't figure out why. She finally told me I had won an award. 

"I did?"

"Yes, you did."  She tells me excited.

"Well, I still don't feel good enough to go."

"Okay, I understand.  I thought I'd try tho.  I'll see you this weekend for the Queen of the Hill tourney." 

"Okay.  Um, what did I win an award for?" I ask.

"Most Tables Runs."  She finally fesses up.

I am perplexed and surprised as I tell her.  "Really?  That's weird, I didn't think I played enough to be in the running for anything.  I had no idea I had that many to win this award.  There were several people in front of me I thought."

"Yea, " she explains, "They had one, you had TWO."

LMFAO!!!

Comments and Timing

/rant on/

I thought I'd share a little rant today - that criticism and comments have their place.

I have written before that I do not like to talk about a match that I just lost.... until I'm ready.  I'm too upset to listen, much less listen with an open mind... if I am still hurting or upset from a loss.  When I am ready to talk about it, it's very obvious - I will ask your opinion about the match and what I could have done to win or improve my chances to win.  Until that time, I don't want to talk about, hear what I could have done, what I did wrong, etc. 

Well, I am beginning to think it's worse DURING a match.

I don't understand why people think it's okay to tell you you should have done something a different way, IN THE MIDDLE OF A MATCH.

Just like I wrote before in my match from May in Vegas, this guys' negative comment was NOT helpful to me:  http://pooljourney.blogspot.com/2012/06/negative-comments.html

While I recovered from his comments during the match, a more recent one I did not:

I was playing in an 8ball tournament, ahead 3-0, earlier this month.  I had this shot in front of me:

My opponent had tried to play safe, but I could easily see the 14 ball.  My very first thought was - "you can just stop the cueball right there, and land right next to the 8ball.  It will be a great safety!"

But, my ego got in the way.  I was up 3-0, I was feeling fantastic, and I knew I could make the 14 and get out now. 

However, I ended up missing the 14 ball.  :(  Since I had rolled the cueball up for shape on the 8, it left my opponent with an easy shot on it to win that game:  (Cueball landed at B below (click to enlarge)):

As I sat in my chair, watching my opponent rack, a friend whispers in my ear, "Why didn't you just stop the ball?  If would have been safe."

I turned around and immediately reacted.  I got perturbed, and maybe slightly embarrassed.

"What?  Why would you say that right now?  Yes, I saw that, too."

What happens next is hard to explain.

But basically.... I'm done.

It's extremely difficult for me to recover from those little words.

You see, now I'm thinking I'm being judged.

Now, when I stand at the table trying to decide what to do, I'm uncomfortable, unsure, and wondering if what I am doing is correct.

Here's the thing:  As soon as I messed up, I immediately knew what I did wrong.  I've been playing pool for 20 years or more.  I KNOW what I did.  I don't need someone pointing it out to me in the middle of match, because it throws off my confidence. 

If I would have turned around and asked, "what could I have done?"  Is one thing.  But to point out the obvious in the middle of battle does NOT help me.  It HURTS me.  It affects me for the rest of the match; and I'd be lucky if I squeaked out a win after that.

And, in this case, I ended up losing.

Even at one point when I missed in the next game or two, I attributed it to that ONE comment.

Now, anyone with a rationale mind will say, "You are crazy, Melinda.  Why let that bother you?"

Well, why tell me in the first place?

I am female and females have a difficult time with acceptance and embarrassment and criticism enough as it is already.

You can tell me all day, "You jumped up.  Stay down.  Don't whack at the ball."  But, judging me in the middle of a match does not bode well for my self esteem, confidence, and it's tough for me to recover from the words.

I don't go around telling players in the middle of their match what they did wrong, or what they should have done.  I leave them alone and let them play pool.  I wish people would stop doing it to me and let me focus on the match I am in.

Pool is difficult enough; I don't need the extra distractions.

There is a time and place.  For everything.

I don't know why THIS particular situation I was not able to recover from, and the other one I was.  I think I had more pressure in this tournament, so it affected me more?  Not sure.

And don't get me wrong, I am open to learn and improve - but at the right time.

It takes so much to focus already.  And I don't want negative thoughts entering my mind.  They are difficult to turn off; especially in the middle of competition.  Right?

/rant off/

I am experienced enough to try and get over comments, but sometimes, well, I don't.  Sometimes they bother me too much.  I am not mentally strong during every single match I play.

It sounds so stupid I can't let things magically not bother me anymore.  But, I still have to try to get over the words quickly by rationalizing the situation.

But in this case, I lost that game, then the next, and the misses and losses kept snowballing.  People were watching across the room, I felt a lot pressure in that tournament.  It was all an unfortunate "perfect storm" of events that affected me in that match.

But, in my mind, that comment triggered it all.  Whether true or not, that's how I felt.

Oh, if I could go back to my initial thought and play safe instead..... and do what has been said a million times - "go with your first instinct."

Trophies

Funny, those little dusk collectors people make fun of.

Funny, those little trophies that get moved from box to box.

Funny, when you are so excited to win one, even a little one, and people make fun of you.

I remember this huge gesture by Vivian Villarreal one time several years ago. She won the Texas State Open (again) for the millionth time (exaggerating, obviously) and after the win, she gave her trophy to a young fan who watched her win.  She has trophies everywhere I'm sure, so this was a great moment for the fan.

I remember this Valentine's Day Trophy I won for a scotch doubles event.  My boyfriend wouldn't even carry his.  I carried both, proudly!

I haven't won many titles in my life, so when I DO happen to win an event with a trophy or a plaque, I am pretty dang excited!  I have expressed numerous times in this blog and to my friends that the title and trophy mean more to me than the prize money.

And I have to believe I'm not the only one. 

And I'm not.

I might get made fun of by guys, or maybe players that win them all the time, but for me they are few and far between.

Funny then, when the BCAPL Texas State tourney didn't have trophies or plaques the last two years for the players.  The ladies wondered where the trophies were.  We figured we would get them in the mail.  Didn't happen.

Then for BCAPL Nationals, my Women's Team WON the Team event! There were only 4 plaques, so being the Captain, I offered to be the fifth person who would receive their plaque later in the mail. Still haven't received it.

Even the other day, the WINNER of the BCAPL Texas State singles women's division had yet to receive her plaque.  Her husband declared, "If they aren't going to send it, at least let me know.  I'd like to order my own plaque for her." 

THEN.........something amazing happened.  My boyfriend's Men's Team won the ACS Texas State team event earlier this month.  All of a sudden, my boyfriend isn't making fun of trophies anymore.  There was only one trophy per team, but almost every player ordered their own copy, and one for the pool room owner who they represent.

It was pretty damn awesome to see these macho men be so proud of the plague.  Granted, it was a beautiful piece of metal, but to hear them each want one ordered for themselves, was pretty special.

I then came home and emailed the BCAPL Nationals.  They didn't have a record I had ordered my Nationals plaque, so they dropped it in the mail this week!

And, they contacted the BCAPL Texas State folks, and there was a miscommunication there, too.  So, both the 1st place and 2nd place women's teams from the last two years will be getting their trophies ordered soon, and my friends (Tracie and Connie) who won the singles division the last two years will be getting their plaques soon, also.  After the owner gets all the info from my friends and I, they will get ordered. 

He was VERY apologetic and thought this was already taken care of.  Then he shared that 2-3 years ago, when they were cleaning up and moving tables out, they found plaques in the trash.  So, since they pay for the trophies with their own money, their new policy was to order plaques after the event if anyone wanted them.  That message wasn't passed down to the players, but some of us know now!  And, we are getting plaques soon.  Yay!

I am so proud of my boyfriend's team that won.  Even the captain has added "State Champ" as his signature for all his texts now.  :)  Pretty cool.

I know the feeling - and IT'S AWESOME.  And soon, they will each have a plaque of their won to prove their awesome win!!  What a great memory piece that will be for them for years and years to come!

See?  Trophies and plaques ARE awesome after all :)