During the team event at the BCAPL Texas State tourney, I had an unfortunate instance happen.
There are many reasons why I wished this never happened, but one selfish reason is because this happened with a player who lives in the same city
where several players think I deliberately shark. I mentioned last year that a lot was resolved and I was very thankful. But, that doesn't mean the stigma isn't still there.
But, because this happened with someone who lived in the same city, I just thought, "great, another unfortunate instance where someone now thinks "yep, she does deliberately shark.""
:(
The more important part of this is I made someone feel bad and that was never my intention. Never! I just reacted to what I saw and instead should have handled it much differently.
As I walked by the first table to play on the second table of the team event, my teammate had just lost and her opponent walked away to her team's sitting table and didn't shake my teammates' hand.
I just reacted and asked my teammates' opponent, "Did you shake her hand?"
I don't recall what she replied, but I asked again, "What happened? Why didn't you two shake hands?"
Being the captain, I feel like I should find out what was going on - did my teammate do something wrong? Or did you just forget?
She kinda snaps at me, "I am going to go back and get my break cue and I'll take care of it."
I'm a little taken a-back but I don't think more about it as I start my match. She comes back over to her team and I then see her teammates consoling her.
I immediately stand up an apologize. I immediately recognize that I have been misunderstood and I upset her. I say from my heart, "I am so sorry, I didn't mean anything by it."
She says to me, "I'm an adult and can take care of my own business."
I sit down and sit a minute and then get back up and turn around to her again and again apologize. I tell her, "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean anything by it. I'm sorry it came across rude; I was just curious if my teammate had done something.
Being the captain, I felt like I should help if something was going on.
But, they way I handled it, maybe I should have just left it alone. Turns out nothing happened, it was just an oversight.
I felt SO bad.
I was literally shaking after this "altercation" and was deeply affected. I didn't mean to hurt her or upset her at all.
If I had to play a hill hill match, I wasn't gonna do well - I was shaking and super upset. Further, it would have been against her and I wouldn't have done well I'm afraid. :(
We didn't go hill-hill, so I didn't have to go through that roller coaster. I shook her hand after the match but we didn't really say anything to each other.
I just hope she accepts my apology sincerely as I meant it.
No comments:
Post a Comment