The Crowd is Not Against You

I have written before that one of the things we finally figure out in our pool journey is when the crowd is cheering for your opponent, try not to take it as them cheering AGAINST you.

I admit, though, it's very easy to think that way, especially in the heat of the battle.

You are already playing your little heart out and here are people rooting against you!

Well, Grasshopper, they aren't really doing that - the people who are clapping are simply just cheering for your opponent, not against you.  But damn, it sure feels like it, huh? STRONGLY feels like it in fact.  Especially if you are down in a match or not playing well, it really STINGS when the crowd cheers excessively for your opponent or only for your opponent (and not you at all).

It's so tough not to take it personal.  I have to talk to myself, "They are just rooting for them, not against me."  I literally have to remind myself because it can be hard to fade.

Pool is already so mental, so that distraction can hurt us, and we need to counter those negative feelings with the realization the cheering isn't against us personally.

At one of the Omega Billiards Tour stops this year, a couple of local players came in early Sunday evening to watch the matches and they had been drinking.  Okay, they were on the drunk side, lol.

This particular match was deep in the tournament between two top players.  One player, let's call him "Tony," made the 9 ball and the two guys start clapping.  Tony wins again, "Good job, Tony!" they yell out clapping loudly.  Clearly on Tony's side and clearly been drinking, lol,

This may not seem out of the ordinary, but let me set the stage:  There had been no clapping or cheering the whole tournament - none at all - not even in this match.  The place was quiet with fans watching, but not jeering going on.

So, it was definitely out of place all of a sudden.

As a Tournament Director, I can't ask them to stop cheering for a player - they weren't being rude or vulgar - but I think everyone in the room felt bad for the other player, let's call him "Rick," who was obviously not being cheered for and left out of the accolades.

They continued to cheer only for Tony and I could tell Rick wasn't bothered by it, but he was aware of them of course.

At one point Rick is racking while the guys are still clapping and verbally congratulating Tony on another notch in the race.  Rick looks over at the guys and then turns to his opponent and declares, "Wow, you have some fans in here."

Rick wasn't being rude, he was just really pointing out what we all were witnessing.  And he did it in a very tactful, funny way.

And what do you know, the guys then started to root for Rick, too!  I don't know if they sensed it or realized it, but when Rick won the next few games, they finally cheered and clapped for him lol.

We can talk to the crowd or make out-loud comments, and it can sometimes help.  I don't recommend it all the time, lol, but sometimes we are too hurt or affected and our emotions cause us to speak up.  I did this once when my opponent was favored in a match in Florida by all her friends and fans.  I was the outsider that was beating her.  I would win another game, nothing,  She would win a game and the crowd went wild (not wild, lol, but clapped for her).  I made a good out and heard nothing.  I said out loud, "I thought that was a good run?"  Looking at the crowd, asking them, sincerely curious, lol.  And they nodded and then clapped.  And thereafter they clapped for the both of us the rest of the match.

I didn't think they were rooting against me, but it still bothered me I wasn't given credit also just because they didn't know me personally.

The point is to NOT let the cheering for your opponent get to you.  I admit it's not easy, but it will help you in the long run when you are in these situations to just realize they are rooting for your opponent, but not against you.  I promise you'll thank me.  :)

Dennis "The Hatchetman" Hatch at ACS Nationals

There were a couple of photos on facebook that included Dennis Hatch and I from the ACS National Championships.

I was very happy (and shocked, lol) that Dennis came to watch my team play, but the rumor mill is a funny thing, lol.

I finally figured out that not many people know that Dennis and I have known each other for years, but more so that Dennis lives IN Vegas now.  Some people thought he came all the way from New York (where he used to live) to watch.  No wonder people were intrigued, lol.

Dennis moved to Vegas for Bonus Ball and so he visited friends at the APA tourney the two weeks before, and then at ACS Nationals, as well.

He came to watch my women's team compete and he was SUPER supportive!  If you've seen Dennis in action, in tourneys, or at the Mosconi Cup, then you know he has more heart and cheer and support than any player, really.

Here are some photos from the Mosconi Cup in 2009 when he got MVP.  It was his first time on the USA team, but he cinched the MVP easily with his talent, play, and enthusiasm!  You can see his personality resonate in these photos:

The following years I went to the Mosconi Cup in the USA and again he was a team member.  And he again be the one to pump up not only his teammates, but the entire crowd!  He was awesome.

BTW, Dennis is a leftie in pool, but is right-handed, just like me.  :)

I should have known what a great impact he would have on my team.  But, although I've known him for years, we've never really hung out in this type of atmosphere before.

His was very down to earth and treated us like HE was a part of OUR team.  I was really impressed.  He would clap and cheer (not rudely, but enough for us to hear), and he was very complimentary to each and every one of my teammates.... at very crucial times during the matches.

When he first showed up, my teammates heard him cheer (he would use their name) and they were like, "he's someone important, right?"  lol.  It was really funny.

He watched our matches Wed evening, Thursday morning, and Thursday night.  Then he watched us win the Women's 9Ball Team division Friday morning:

He had to leave during the 8ball finals, but he sent me a message about the team and the dynamics, because he noticed something and wanted to help.  And he was right - we had more emotion and energy during the 9ball finals, just an hour before.

At that point, I tried to pump up my teammates - well, wake them up a a little bit more.

As captain, I had thought the previous night that if we win or lose the 9ball, the team would be "tired" from emotions and the 8ball finals would be kinda tough for us.

I then told my teammates all these tips to "wake up" and get more energized (we had just lost the first set in the finals). 

I told them:

• drink COLD water,
• eat a small snack,
• jog to the bathroom (it was kinda far anyway),
• take a shot if you need it, lol,
• do jumping jacks in the bathroom to get energy,
• put your hair up (it was warm in there),
• suck on some mints, or
• even use paper as a small fan

It was really warm in the room, also, and we needed ENERGY.  All the above can get the juices flowing in our body!

Besides the advice above, I told them what Dennis had said.  I noticed that they all already really appreciated Dennis and I knew they would listen to his words.

Sure enough, we each pepped up.  And we ended up winning the second set and won our second ACS Nationals title that day!  (8ball)

I, personally, was really appreciative that I was able to ask Dennis about my outs or shots after I was done with a game. Dennis either confirmed I made the correct out, or if he offered another solution, it was very positive and upbeat, never negative.  But to pick his brain was AWESOME.  

He also gave advice to one of my teammates (that I will share in another blog) and it was so smart the way he described the advice.  I will learn from it forever, actually.

He was very complimentary to each teammate.  It really helped our self confidence!

One of my teammates is a bartender and she heard that Mike Massey was scheduled to do an exhibition while she was in Vegas for ACS.  After a couple of days around Dennis, she confides, "I'm not even mad about not seeing Mike Massey anymore, I got to know Dennis and hang around him!"

I shared that with Dennis because it was cute and his response showcases his personality so well.  He said, "Wow, that's nice.  I like Mike Massey- he's a great guy, but that's cool she said that."

I witnessed over and over again players coming up to Dennis saying hi.  This is how EVERY convo went (I was VERY impressed):

"Hi Dennis, I'm Jack, nice to meet you."

"Nice to meet you too, Jack" (he shakes their hand).

"I saw you online, a footage from the Mosconi Cup.  You played great."

"Thanks, Jack - means a lot.  So, how is your team doing?"  As he leans his head toward Jack's team.

And Jack would respond.

Dennis was never about himself.  He made the player approaching him feel like a rock star and that he was really interested in how their team was doing.  It was very refreshing and really unselfish.

Then he would share how OUR team was doing.  "They're playing for the hotseat," for example.

For a top pro, he was very impressive, down to earth, and not selfish at all.  And he really cared about all the players there.

My entire team was very flattered he watched our matches and that he was genuinely interested.  I told him he was lucky we played well, because players that can't make balls are boring to watch, lol.  

Dennis is very smart when it comes to the mental part of the game.  He suggested we go to dinner on Thursday night, and he did it intentionally.  We had shots with him and his friend, and he did that to get our minds off the fact we would be playing two final matches tomorrow.  He told me, "this is good for them," and he was right - we had fun and were distracted.  Just what the Doctor ordered!

A BIG thank you to Dennis Hatch from Nina, Courtney, Janet and myself!!!

Giving and Receiving

I am really appreciating the kudos from my teammates and boyfriend when I play. 

Although I am a good player, I still love accolades. 

And it pumps me up!

They appreciate a good run or shot and they say something verbally about it.  They don't take me for granted and they are watching my games and being super supportive!  In tournaments and in leagues.

It really, really, really pumps me up. 

And I have noticed my teammates' kudos more and more recently for some reason. I don't know if it's because of the people I'm surrounded with or what, but I don't recall this before.  Oh wait, maybe I didn't play well enough before to get shout outs, lol!

As for me, I admit I'm apprehensive about saying "good shot" too loud because I think it's kinda rude to the other team or the opponent. 

But, I've decided I want to start being more vocal!

I have always said good shot when the shot was exceptional, or during big team events I'm obviously a good cheerleader.  But because I see how amazing the support feels on a little 'ole league night, I am going to start reciprocating and be more vocal with my friends.

It makes me feel amazing and my friends deserve recognition for great shots.  Time to stop being too cordial and instead more supportive.
 

Do What You Have To Do

I wrote recently how my Monday team had won our league playoffs.  I alluded to the fact that we were down both sets, and then came back strong the second set in the finals to win.

What I didn't share until now is what our table looked like on our side of the bar!

One of my teammates recognized the other team was getting a lot of rolls the first set.  So, she started to turn things upside down on the table.  Yep, as a way to "turn things around."

Laugh all you want!  It made for a great pic, a great scene, and a lot of laughs!

We started to turn everything upside down.

Bottles, purses, cans, coin holders, you name it, we went along with her and did it, too!

The waitress came by at one point and said, "um, are those bottles suppose to be like that?"

My teammate quipped, "yep!"

"Okay, then I wont touch them or try to remove them right now," as she slowly walked away confused but obliging, lol.

Well, superstition or not, we won the second set beautifully, winning 8 matches in a row for the title!

Here is a pic of our table, and another where I point out what is what turned upside down, lol

Beating the Extrovert

I played in my men's league on Monday night.  I didn't know which team we were up against, but it turned out to be a real good team.

One of the members on the other team intimidates me.  I have wrote about him before. 

He basically shouts out when his team does well, shouts out his disapproval when they don't do well, and has even called me out for my choices on the table.  Sure, he's just an extrovert.  But, I don't like to be judged during my matches.  I judge myself enough, I don't need to be standing at the table, trying to decide what to shoot, while also worrying this guy might verbally not like my choices and tell me in front of everyone.

Granted, this is MY issue, not his.

BUT, it doesn't mean it's still easy for me to play pool in front of him.

I play my first match, feel myself choosing the wrong run, but decided I can do it.  I have to come with a shot on the ball before the 8 and scratch.  :(  I get SUPER embarrassed b/c I think someone clapped, but also b/c I knew I was running the balls wrong and felt this guys and others thought the same thing.

Next match, my arms are still a little wobbly from embarrassment and I admit I feel like people watch me more to see if I really deserved that National Team win back in May.  Yes, I KNOW I'm not suppose to think that way, but winning tournaments does NOT mean we no longer feel pressure.  Quite honestly, sometimes we feel MORE.

Anyway, I fly the cueball off on the break.  Ugh.  BUT - I get a chance at the table!  But, miss a tough shot.  :(  The guy runs out.

TWO losses right off the bat.

I win my next game and I tell myself, "I might be able to pull out three wins tonight, still."

I win my next game, too.   WHEW!

Then I realize, though, that I will have to play the extrovert as my last match.  Damn.  He's so tough to play.  Well, he's tough when he's on the sidelines, too.

He breaks dry (somehow) and get this.... I RAN OUT!  OMG!  I shook his hand after the 8ball fell and said, "That's the first time I ever beat you!"  All proud.  :)  He replies, "Yep sure is the first time out of all these times." (ugh)

But, no hooping and hollering from him this time!  Or telling me what I should have done different to run out. 

Instead, the only words I hear are from my boyfriend on the sidelines saying a few times out loud, "good shot!" during my run.  :)

I then tell my team as they high-five me, "CIRCLE!" Which means I ran out from the break - AND I get a quarter from each teammate.  :)

CIRCLE THIS!

(just kidding)

What Are You Clapping For?

I overheard an interesting exchange the other day.

Some friends were competing against each other in an APA city tournament.  It was a pretty crucial tourney as which ever team won, would get a free trip to Vegas.

The tension was high but so was support from team members.

Evidently, one of the players (Guy A) was upset people were clapping after he missed.  His team ended up losing and he was the final teammate to play.  So he was probably upset they lost, so the clapping in the final match affected him any more.

After the loss, Guy A told Team B they should not be rude and cheer misses.

Team Captain B told Guy A that they were not clapping when he missed, instead, they were actually cheering for their teammate who was about to be up at the table, to show their support.

So, it went something like this:

Guy A would miss, Teammates B would clap and say out loud, "Come on Brandon, let's go!  You can do this!"

However, Guy A took the clapping as them cheering for his misses.
 
I don't like when people clap after misses, either.  It can be rude (or taken as rude).  Timing is everything.  More importantly, perspective is key.

When you hear clapping and cheering, try to remember that the people are only cheering FOR for your opponent and not AGAINST you.  This perspective can go a long way. 

Let's face it, we have all been on the underside of that embarrassment feeling that leads to anger when we feel like no one is on our side and our opponents are getting all the cheers.

But if you realize the people are not rooting against you, it's a little easier to handle.

Heckler in Reno

As usual, several blog topics magically present themselves when I go to tournaments, lol.  And since for an entire week I was around pool in Reno, I have numerous topics to share!

I wont put them all in one post, as that would just put you to sleep, lol. Even when I shared my Reno Recap, I had SO much I could have added, but the entry was already long as it was.  Instead, I will write about some topics separately.

Let me start with The Heckler story. The guy really wasn't a "heckler" but in my female, irrational, raised emotional state of mind, he will forever be over-exaggerated with that title because of this "situation."

I was playing Susan Williams on the one loss side of the 10 ball division, already a very tough match. We were on table 20, which was right in front, where the bleachers are, so people were in the stands to watch as we fought it out for either finishing in 5th place or moving on to the 4th place match.

I'm down 2-1 then 3-2, but I have an opportunity to run out this layout in front of me. As I finish the great out (yay me!) and make the ten ball to tie the score 3-3, I hear someone say, "Come on, Babe."

At this point, I'm thinking:  Who is that?  My boyfriend isn't here.  So I wonder who that is being sweet?

You be might wondering, "Well, why didn't you just look up and see who said it?"

Well, I was taught by the famous player, Joe Salazar, not to look at the crowd. It's too easy to be distracted by what you think others are thinking, but if you don't "see" anyone in the crowd, you can't be distracted by them, and instead focus on pool easier. I have used this technique successfully numerous times, and esp in big tournaments where the crowds are larger.

Okay, back to the match:

Susan breaks at 3-3 and I hear the same voice say, "Come on Williams."

Ah.... the person was pulling for Susan, not me. Lol.

I didn't let it get to me, tho, as I have learned over the years that people who cheer for my opponent are rooting for them, not rooting against me. It's an extremely valuable learning experience the sooner you learn this concept, btw.

During the next two games, The Heckler moves around a lot for some reason: behind us, to the side of us, to the bleachers, etc., all the while clapping for Susan and saying nice things after her good shots. I just keep focused, because I am playing well and trying to fight hard in this match. 

The match goes hill-hill (4-4) but I miss my out (frown), so Susan is running out. But, she misses the 9 ball!  As the 9ball rolls to the end rail, the cueball is about to get hooked behind the 10ball. The Heckler (who is now in the bleachers) says out loud (louder than anything he has ever said up to this point), "Hey look, it's gonna get safe."

I would have been fine with that. It was about to be a safe.

But he raises his voice, "safe, safe, safe!!" ....almost willing for it to hook me.

As this point, my clear-thinking, rationale-Melinda, is no where to be found. I'm PISSED at him. This is no longer cheering for Susan, but rooting for a bad roll. 

As I walk up to the table I say, "wow" in utter disbelief.

Susan replies, "I'm sorry."

I explain, "No, not at that, at him" as I point my finger loudly, directly at the guy sitting in the bleachers in his white shirt all chummy.

I'm no longer in a match.  I'm now defending my emotions.  I tell The Heckler, "You didn't have to say that. It was already going to get safe, that was obvious."

He defends himself, as I've just called him out in front of the entire crowd, "It wasn't personal."

I snap back, "Then you shouldn't have said it at all."

Yep, I'm upset! 

I kick at the 9ball, hit it, but don't make it. I'm actually surprised I could even kick successfully because I was so upset. 

Susan is left with a tough 9ball and then a tougher 10ball. I'm still very content, tho. I played my little heart out and went hill-hill with Susan Williams, didn't let my nerves get to me, and I was about to place 5th! But, the long, straight-in 10ball was missed and I was left was a very make able shot to win the set 5-4, and to move on!

I walked up to the tournament desk to turn in my score sheet, and vented about The Heckler. My adrenaline is rapidly flowing, as I don't like to get upset to the point where I speak up rudely.

As I go grab my things for my next match, he is still in the bleachers and I overhear him say, "I just got in trouble."  He shares his version, which isn't what I just experienced. I wanted to interrupt and tell the person he was talking to, "If you want to hear what really happened just let me know." But, I just walked by and let it be, because I had a match to get to.

I found out later that The Heckler actually sharked Susan with his cheers.  The whole thing was very unfortunate. 

Unlucky for me, I would see him every single day the rest of the week, sometimes several times a day in the tournament room.  I never made eye contact with him and would instead ignore his entire presence and just walk by him like the exchange never happened.  I did not know who this guy was before the week in Reno.  Turns out he's been around pool for a while, but I don't recall seeing him before.

I am not happy I reacted like that in the middle of a match and in the front of people.  But I am human and make mistakes and react to my emotions and feelings in the heat of the battle sometimes.

Dang hecklers!

Cheering Against You

Two night ago I went to Vino's in Hurst, Texas where they have a little 8-ball bar table tourney on Sunday nights.

They pay Last Lady (LL), so it's a cool little tourney for me.  The prize for LL is $5 per female who enter the tourney, and on this night out of 31 players there were 10 of us.  Wow!  That's $50.  :)  Also, Vino's adds $5 per player, too, so it's a tough tournament.

I played in this tourney a few weeks ago and beat a kinda cocky guy so I'll call him Mr. Cocky.  I play pretty good eight ball, so to beat a cocky player is always cool, I admit.  :)

Since I didn't drink this particular night, I had a good shot at getting LL, but I still had a tough road ahead of me and had to play smart.  It was definitely no gimme.

I won my first 3 matches, but one of them was a bye, so I didn't get credit for that for the LL tally.  LL is decided by how may games you win.

So, for my first one-loss side match, I'm tied for LL with one other girl and I feel some pressure, admittedly, to get that $50.  I'm also playing for 5th place (and they only pay 3 spots).

I play a real tall fella (Mr. Tall) whom I hadn't seen before, but he knew all the people by our table, who were watching him.  It's a race to 1.  Yes,  I said One.  Lol.  So, it's an important game - I either move on AND win LL, or tie LL and have a playoff with the other girl. 

I am playing pretty good and smart, but he only has two balls left on the table when I try to play safe.  He goes for the only shot I left him (a cut shot in the side) and he makes it and all of a sudden his friends start clapping and cheering and carrying on!  Mr. Cocky is cheering loudly and they are all going crazy over this cut shot.

I was trying to figure out what was going on and why they were so excited.

I could feel the adrenaline rising through my body as I tried so hard not to let it get to me.  It *felt* like they were against me, but I knew in my heart that wasn't the case.  But it still didn't mean the cheering didn't pierce my heart and hurt.

He missed the next shot and I ran a few balls but had to play safe again, this time on the 8-ball.  I thought I would leave him a bank, instead it was a cut in the side.  I knew as soon I was walked away from the table he could make it.  I hoped he would still miss it, though (lol), but instead the 8-ball went right into the side pocket.

And his friends start to cheer and clap again.  Mr. Tall high-fives Mr. Cocky as Mr. Tall is celebrating and I stand there with my hand out ready to shake, and my blood starts to boil from my emotions of them going crazy over the stupid 8-ball shot.  Everyone over there is cheering him and saying what a great shot it was and he finally comes to the table to shake my hand.

I go to the bathroom to wash my hands before my playoff for LL and as I stand there rinsing my hands, I tell myself, "Don't let if bother you, Melinda. You know they weren't rooting against you, they were just rooting for him."  While I was told this golden nugget of information a long time ago, and while my brain is aware of that (esp since I reminded myself of it), it still doesn't mean it didn't sting.  :(  It hurt my little heart.  :(

I was nervous I'd have to play on the same table in front of all those guys for my LL play-off, but I recovered and I won that $50.  Yay Me!

As I stayed around til the end of the tourney to watch my boyfriend capture First Place, one of his teammates comes up to me at the end of the night and says, "You are the one to beat, obviously.  Those guys went crazy when he played you, all that cheering and stuff."

"Yea, and it bothered me."

"But it just means they are trying to beat you badly.  That you are a tough opponent."

"Do what?"

He continues to explain, "They went crazy clapping, but only when he played you.  It shows they all wanted him to beat you.  Because you are a good player."

I liked his perspective!  I hadn't thought of it that way and that made sense why it seemed they cheered more when he played me than his other opponents.  :)

I love differing perspectives that help me figure out situations, because as we all know - we can't read minds and we take others actions wrong sometimes.

Maybe I need to give myself more credit as a top female player in these tourneys.

And I hope I remember this golden piece of info also the next time people cheer and clap for my opponent.

Ahh... perspectives!