Wednesday, May 30, 2012

Mental Status in Vegas (May 2012)

As I've mentioned several times already, I played in both the ACS Nationals and the BCAPL Nationals in May this year... and I had a heck of a run!!  I'm elated by my finishes; truly am.

To recap my trip:

ACS Nationals 9Ball Women's Singles:   Out in two

ACS Nationals 8Ball Women's Singles:   3rd place

BCAPL Nationals 9Ball Women's Singles:   9th place

BCAPL Nationals Open Scotch Doubles:     one out of the money

BCAPL Nationals 8Ball Women's Singles:   17th place out of 388 players

CSI Straight Pool Challenge, Women's Division:   1st place!

BCAPL Nationals Women's Open Team:    1st place!!
 
While all my good finishes were (are still) amazing to me, the two weeks were also full of many personal heartaches.  I have had a lot of "things" happen in the last 4 weeks where people questioned my character and integrity, and I learned that some people aren't really my friends after all.

I know in my heart I played badly the first event because I could care less about the world or pool.  I was so upset with my "relationships" with friends that my mental game suffered.  While I rebounded in my next event (and place 3rd in ACS Nationals 8Ball Women's Singles), I would find out even MORE things the following week that had me constantly crying in my hotel room, questioning my trust in friends, and questioning my faith in being a good person to the game of pool and in life.

The passing of my Mom in August has been very rough on me.  I have barely survived.  And then to be thrown to the wolves (so to speak) by people really took it's toll on me.  I haven't been in this dark of a place in my life in a long time.  If all these "situations" would have occurred over the course of a year, I wouldn't have been so upset.  But because they all happened with 4 weeks of each other, I seriously couldn't handle it. 

Seriously.

Only a few friends knew what was going on with me internally, and how bad it really was.  I didn't want to share my sorrows even more; I am already expressing almost every day how terrible it is without my Mom.

But I WAS upset.  Very.  Still am.  Hurt.  Beyond words.

However, all this going on, how did I manage to play pool?  And play somewhat successfully? 

As we know, pool is mostly mental.

My teammate Monica helped me with the answer, by asking me this question:  "What was your goal this year?"

The answer was simple:  My goal was to give myself the best chance to play well.

I didn't have a goal to "finish in a certain place", or to "do well in the tourneys."  My goal was instead to get rest, not stay out late, not get drunk a lot, and get sleep so that I would give myself the best chance to play pool well.

I know I play best when I'm well-rested, and not hungover.  I know that I think clearer and have a sharper mental game when I have had sleep and am NOT exhausted.  I know that I execute my fundamentals and pre-shot routine best when I am rested (I get lazy when I'm tired). 

I took naps, rested a lot, didn't stay out late, only drank twice the whole two weeks, and did a lot of things to prepare my mental state full of good things:  I sat by several casino pools, walked along pretty gardens in the casinos; took in the atmosphere of The Mirage (it's beautiful there); ate properly during the day and before matches; rested a lot in my room and took naps when needed; ate lunch or dinner with good friends.  You can see the theme here:  being proactive to achieve a good mental aura.

Ahhh... The Mirage pool/waterfall.  

The Tropicana, so serene, right?!  ACS was held here.

Baby dolphin!!  At The Mirage Casino

The Riviera pool, where the BCAPL was held.

So, that was my goal:  give myself the best chance to play pool well by taking care of myself.

And, it worked.

My only wish was my Mom was still alive so I could share my accomplishments with her.  I know she'd be so proud of me. 

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