Although I have played in two other weekly 8ball tourneys since May, for some reason, this day felt wonderful to be back on the table. I felt like I hadn't played in ages, and I just so love me some good 8ball!
Many people congratulated me on our Women's Team National Champ win and I could hear whispers as I played, but I didn't feel pressure, I felt, dare I say, a little powerful?
When I won the ACS State in October, afterwards I felt like I was under a microscope. I felt like everyone expected me to automatically win all my league matches and the weekly tourneys. I put SO much pressure on myself to play up to par that everyone expected of me, because I won that tourney. Instead, I faltered.
Most people are aware that it is tough to repeat another big win right away after your first win, or sometimes to even play really well right after. You FEEL so much pressure on yourself, that it's tough to accomplish another big win immediately.
I have witnessed this with my own eyes.
Back in 1999 in Florida, a fellow competitor won a Ladies Spirit Tour event. Everyone was elated for her; it was her first tourney win! In the very next event, however, she got in the loser's side right away and many people discussed that this was actually quite normal - it would be tough for her to place well again right away; it's a lot of pressure. And sure enough, after some time had passed, the pressure was lifted and she was back in the finals.
IMO, this is definitely true after your first big win. But once you get a few wins under your belt, you feel less pressure and you feel more confident, composed, and certain.
So, back to my weekend tourney. I didn't feel pressure to do well. I didn't feel like I *should* play well b/c of my recent big win. Instead, I felt like I *can* play well; like I'm suppose to now.
“Experience tells you what to do; confidence allows you to do it.” - Stan Smith
Back in Oct, after my win, my feelings and sensations were very different. I felt so much pressure to play well and succeed at league and weekly tourneys. After all, I was now a "State Champ." People watched me play and expected me to magically not miss. Well, *I* thought they expected that, lol. I was a mess, really, for a while. All the pressure of hearing over and over again "State Champ" got to me; I put too much pressure on myself.
However, hearing the whispers as I played last Saturday about being a National Champion didn't faze me. Like I said, I was in a good place mentally and I didn't feel any pressure to play good or show that I was indeed a National Champ. Instead, I just simply LOVED playing the game I love so much. I enjoyed the competition and relished the congrats; instead of the kudos backfiring. I really believe that the win in Oct, my successful run in Reno, and the recent team win is helping my confidence.
BTW, my boyfriend and I only placed 4th in the Scotch Doubles tourney. boo-hiss!
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