Direction Needed, and Found!

I am not a very visionary person. I have learned in my leadership classes at work that you either have that type of personality or you don't. I'm the don't.

I do like goals. Well, love goals actually, and they have been very helpful in my life.  But I am not one to think of the future, wonder what if, or even contemplate the tough questions about life in general. Your purpose in life, sort of questions. Why am I here, sort of questions.

Then something changed all that.

Although I never thought that way for all my life, the last two months I have questioned my life. I have questioned my purpose.

I am an only child, am not married, do not have kids, and I just lost my Mom, the love of my life. Before my Mom got sick, many considered me the Ambassador of Pool in Texas. But I stopped being the photographer at independent events, stopped calling in brackets to AZBilliards.com, stopped promoting tournaments, and I retired after 9 years on the Board and as TD from the OB Cues Ladies Tour 3 years ago to take care of my Mom and that has been my life. I have no regrets as I love her very much.

But now that she is gone, what is important now in my life? And what do I have to keep me happy and interested and going?

I could now try to move up in my job, but I admit I love my current position and don't have aspirations to move up.  And I'm okay with that - because I am SO happy and challenged.  And not many people are truly happy in their jobs, so I savor every day on my way to work.

So, back to the question I never ask: what is my purpose?

I know I'm not the only person who has asked this question, but for me it's a very new and unexpected question.

I love to live life to the fullest. Ask anyone and they will tell you.

But what is my purpose now that my Mom has passed? I no longer have her to take care of - that was my purpose for the last 5 years.

Then an amazing thing happened.

I read on AZB a thread where people were asked to list their pool heroes and why. As I read the replies, I saw that two people mentioned me.

Me?

What?

I replied to them and told them thank you and added that I was speechless, because I was.

Then one of the guys sent me a message and shared further why I was his hero.

Here is what he said:

Hey Trigger,

Just wanted to say that I'm glad I made your day by including you in my "Pool Heroes" post.

It's the truth. You set the example for a lot of us players. You have a full time job, you play and practice constantly and you blog about it, so we can all learn from your journey. Heck, I never would have picked up a Capelle book, if it weren't for your blog. Now, I own three.

Whenever I'm down on my game and I don't feel like playing or practicing, I think, "Melinda would play, no matter what". So, I go play.

It's easy to pick a celebrity or pro as a hero (you kinda are a celebrity BTW ), but players like yourself are the true heroes of our game.

Thanks for all you do for us.

Take care,
-Jeremy from Florida

After reading his message, I know now I have a purpose. I know now that my life in pool was no accident. I now feel that although pool has made me into the confident woman you see today, I have affected others in their life because of all the things I have done in pool over the years.

Thank you, Jeremy, akaStandby Kid. It doesn't seem like it from this long post, but I really am speechless for your thoughtful, open words that allowed me to see myself in different, meaningful, purposeful way.

Thank you!!