Pool is a Journey

There's No Crying in Pool!

2012-01-31T13:08:00.001-06:00

As the famous line in A League of Their Own, as the female baseball player is crying, Tom Hanks tell her, "There's no crying in baseball!!"

Well, evidently, there is crying in pool, too.

I think it's EXTREMELY ironic that just on Friday I wrote a blog post to share my thoughts about the pain, frustrations, pressures, and heartbreak of competition. While I wrote that post to help newcomers, I did reference that even players who have been playing for years still feel heartbreak and discouragement after their matches. I have listened to my friends vent, seen their emotions escalate, and even witnessed their tears.

After this past weekend, I now think my post was incorrect. I now think I was wrong. It's not newcomers that feel discouraged. It's the some of the seasoned players that feel the most pain!! lmao. Some of the seasoned players have competed for a long time and even though we have more experience, the heartbreak is harder on us. I think I'm feeling more discouraged as my game goes up.

It's very frustrating!

:(

There were 50 women at the first OB Cues Ladies tour stop this past weekend. It was a GREAT turn out and a very well-run event!

I was not nervous Saturday so that meant I was probably gonna do okay. No expectations works best for me.

I won my first match (played good), got nervous my second match because I made mistakes and almost lost (but I won). Won my 3rd match and then my 4th.

All of a sudden, I'm left on the winner's side on Sunday! OMGoodness! I was SO excited and not sure how that happened (okay, I played good and got a decent draw), but it felt good. :)

But, I could feel my heart race when I couldn't go back to sleep on Sunday morning. I thought about why I was nervous (and the match was 4 hours away!). I could tell my nerves were building up, so I tried to calm myself down. I ran through the many mental toughness things I've learned over the years. I knew if I didn't think of the expectations, I would do better. I tried to simply be happy I was able to play on Sunday.

I posted on my akatrigger FB page, "Expectations are my enemy". I tried as hard as I could not to think of the results, but I admit, I wanted to win because if I did, I'd be playing in the hotseat and that would be my highest finish yet on this tour! (My highest finish is a few 4th place finishes).

I know how to stop the chatter in my brain (taught to me by Phil Capelle) and he said to focus on my pre shot routine and three balls ahead. But I could tell I was still nervous. :(

I read a comment from Ingo on my FB post and he said,

"Just define your goals- 3 timezones: short,middle and long. Note everything you do and did. So you can *clear* the list by working on each point :-) clearly defined goals/targets are better than expectations."

A light bulb went off my head and instead of focusing my concentration on my pre-shot routine and three balls ahead, instead, I made it my goal! Ingo really helped me out.

I was very nervous the first game of the match on Sunday morning and missed an 8 ball because of it. I then calmed myself down, tho, and concentrated on my goals: Smooth stroke, three balls ahead.

It really, really worked! I played SO good!

I didn't want to lose from nerves. I didn't want to dog it because my arms were wobbly from nerves. And I didn't - I played good! I saw the layouts SO well, checked for shape, saw three balls ahead crystal clear, but......................

I missed late in the rack. :(

A lot.

Too much.

I scratched on a tough 6ball (with two balls left on the table); I fouled on a 7ball; I missed a tough cut on the 8 ball, trying to hold the cueball for shape; I scratched on a 9ball when my opponent was on the hill; Missed that first 8ball; And scratched on a 7ball.

That's 6 games and I lost 4-7.

When the score was 4-3 me, I was on the 6 ball and saw the run. Tears swelled in my eyes as I thought to myself, "I'm close to playing in the hotseat." I then fouled on the 7ball and she took a break at 4-4...and I even told myself I might lose. I knew the break could be costly to me. I tried not to reflect on my misses or what the score "should have been..." I can honestly say I wasn't beating myself up, but I did feel a little deflated after every game I felt I gave away.

I played SO @#$$%*^% good, but couldn't close out for some reason. I lost my chance to play for the hotseat. I gave the match away. "It was not my time," I told myself. :(

But, as I shook her hand, I mumbled I gave the match away (which wasn't fair to her), but I truly felt that way. I walked outside the pool room and started to cry. Then I came back in to get my things, and as I drove home (to pick up my b/f so he could play league for me), I cried on the way there. When I walked in, I cried as I walked into his arms. I was sobbing! I was cry baby! :( I was so emotional. So upset. I lost. Badly. Played good, but still handed the match over.

Everyone kept telling me, "but you are still in." Still, the heartbreak of knowing how close I was was extremely painful. :(

I had almost two hours to wait til my next match and the same thing happened again! I would see the patterns well, but would miss late in the rack. It was heartbreaking. I lost 4-7 again and went immediately outside, and cried AGAIN!

There's no crying in pool!

;(

A friend comes outside (because he thought I was leaving) and he calls my name, "Hey Melinda!"

I shout, "don't talk to me. Please! Don't do it..." as I put my hands over my face and start to sob....

He walks up to me and tries to console me. He tells me that it just means I care. He tells me, "You are human. Humans make mistakes. It's okay."

I tell him again "I tired...." and he says he understands.

He keeps trying to console me as I keep crying.

Then he says, "I do have some advice for you."

I immediately raise my voice, still crying, "No, I can't take it. No, don't tell me anything. I'm too upset and my heart can't take it at this moment!" (completely aware that I'm sobbing and I know from experience I can't take constructive criticism too early after a loss)

And he tells me anyway, "You are taking it too serious. It's just a game."

Later on, I did ask him if he saw anything I could work on (like, did I jump up or not take my time, etc) and he said he didn't notice anything.

One of my other friends tells me (after I calmed down), "You played good." I turned to her and hugged her real hard as I shared, "Thank you for that." She kinda laughs and says "you did play well, just missed some balls at the end of the rack." I felt relief for some reason. Felt relief that I really DID play well, dangit! lol.

I placed 5th outta 50 and while I should be happy, I'm trying to figure out a few things: Why did I miss balls late in the rack? Why was I so emotional? What are my learning experiences?

First, my mental game is still very soft still right now. I'm not sure why, but it's obvious I am thinking too much during my matches (even when down on shots I have been thinking too much). While that might be a tough thing to tame, it's something I need to work on to help me succeed.

Second, I was very emotional all weekend. My Mom was on my mind a lot and I feel I am not doing well in that regard.

Third, while I'm embarrassed I cried, it shows how much I love this game and that I care. I have expectations and although I wanted to place further, the two matches on Sunday will forever be great arsenals of knowledge for me for the future.

It's funny, in the blog on Friday I stated that the more experiences you have, the better it is for our game. I've decided in order for me to do better on Sundays, I need to play in more tournaments to last until Sunday so I can keep trying and get more experience to be able to handle the invisible pressure I put on myself on Sundays. The sooner I get over this "obstacle," the more goals I can make and be better prepared for.

I'm a cry baby!

:(

Eventual winner of this event, Ming Ng!

Amanda, Yvette and I. :)

Veronica, who toasted for my Mom! Very touching.

New Tour Member Angst

2012-01-28T06:16:00.003-06:00

A friend called me this week for a pep talk. There is an OB Cues Ladies Tour event being held IN our city this weekend and she had reservations about playing in it.

"I don't feel quite ready yet to enter the Ladies Tour stop this weekend. I just don't think I'm prepared."

She should take advantage that the tournament is in town! Further, I explained it's important she get her feet wet in this type of big women's tourney. I also tried to share my experience with her that the more tourneys you play, the more comfortable you will eventually get --> and, your game will improve because of the experiences.

I also touched on (carefully worded but didn't go into detail), that she might get frustrated in this tourney, because a Big Ladies Tournament is a whole-lot different than practicing. I didn't go into details, but my heart ached about the emotions I wanted to express, so I felt like writing this blog entry about it to explain some things us ladies go through. I wonder if guys go through the same thing?

Anyway, she mentioned she practices well with friends, but then come league or weekly tourney time, she sometimes doesn't do as well and gets frustrated. I told her that was very normal and we all go through that. And quite frankly, many are still going through that, even after playing pool for years; it takes much experience. There is no pressure when we practice. Tournaments are full of ALL different types of pressures.

I tried to express that she needs to start to get her feet wet now. Don't wait til she thinks she is ready, because I don't know anyone who ever feels they are ready, lol.

She is getting a lot of flack from guy friends who are telling her to enter the tourney, etc. I told her the expectations people put on us are very unfortunate. I know I always hated to come back to work on Monday and share I "only got 24th place" and then my coworkers wonder why I still play this game. :(

However, what I didn't get across to my friend and what I didn't have the heart to share with her yet, was that she might get very disappointed. I'm not here to debbie-down anyone, but it takes YEARS to finally feel comfortable in a big ladies tour event. But you have to start somewhere! It takes years to finally even play well in a big ladies event. It takes years to finally not let the mental game get the best of you (I still learn about the mental game during every tourney). It can sometimes take years to last until Sunday.

I don't care how many hours your practice, the mental aspects of playing in a tournament is quite frankly, BRUTAL. The pressure is immense sometimes. But - it's the best experience for your game! I have so many friends who cry after matches, tourneys, and weekends. It's tough to accept that you KNOW you play so much better than how you just played in a big tourney. It can be heartbreaking; extremely emotional to be so disappointed in yourself and your own expectations. Saturday you can't make a ball, and then Sunday when you are out of the main event, your game shows up!

Sure, tournaments are fun and my friend will have a GREAT time in the environment among great friends ("Good Pool. Good Friends. Good Times. "). But, I'm also aware if she doesn't perform well, she might get disappointed and discouraged. Hopefully that wont happen and maybe she is mentally stronger than I realize! But, it happens to many of my friends even today, many who have been playing for a long time.

However, I want all players to know that we have all felt this way. It just takes time, commitment, pain, tears, frustrations, etc. to finally feel good about our performance in these big tournaments. And, the success WILL come!

The sooner you enter tournaments, the more experience you will get. The more heartache you feel, the tougher you become for the next tournament/opponent. Tournaments are not easy. Sure, they are suppose to be fun, but they are emotionally very tough on our hearts and emotions and will power.

Almost damaging sometimes. It's very frustrating to know you play better than what you performed. ;-(

So, now that I've basically ruined fun expectations (lol, sorry), let me be a good ambassador of the game and share what I have seen that has worked to counter this the fastest:

Take lessons. The friends who have taken lessons do so much better in the tournaments much much faster than people who haven't.
Keep entering the tournaments. While it takes time to become mentally strong and finally "show up" in tournaments, the more tournaments you enter, the more experience you get. And the better you become!
The best advice my friend Cristina ever received was to "Put yourself in competitions above your skill level whenever possible." Read her great article about this on her blog.
Talk to friends. Friends who have been playing for a while can empathize with you and share that they have felt all these same emotions you are feeling. Talk to them about your concerns before and after matches. It will help!
Time. Time is your friend. On Saturday you may be crying, but come Monday you will want to be playing again! I promise.
Read about the mental game. While each match you play in will strengthen your mental game, it will also help if you can learn about the mental aspects of competing from books, too.

I'm sharing this "ugly" side of competing so my friends wont feel like they are the only ones who go through this. I went through it for years, and even now I still sometimes get very upset after matches. And I've been playing for over 20 years. And, I see my friends' heartache a lot, too. It's part of competition, but the rewards are there, I promise!

Remember, Pool Is A Journey!

And my friend Janea describes competing perfectly:

'I know this may sound kinda silly but, the main reason I love playing pool competitively is that it's like a spiritual practice for me. Ironically, when I stopped playing to win, is when I started winning. And when I fall back into the habit of trying to win, I start losing. To me, playing pool is about being patient, present, compassionate, empathetic, gracious, respectful, forgiving, kind, persistent, in the flow, accepting, emotionally intelligent, calm, conscious....sure, winning feels great! but I feel like if I'm improving any one of those areas from playing, then I AM winning! :) Now, if only I could remember that when the pressure is on and my nerves are going nuts!"

Round Two Straight Pool Match Result (2)

2012-01-27T09:34:00.000-06:00

After my Friday night loss that put me 0-3 for the beginning of my straight pool season, I reflected a lot. What was going on? Why was I playing so bad? Was I in a rut? Not taking my time? What?

I wanted to find the nearest bridge after that loss (I was very upset), but then I told myself, "Well, you just aren't playing well. Maybe you are in a rut. It's too late to try to win the top shooter. Just accept you are playing bad."

The next day (Saturday), I play in a scotch tourney and win it with my b/f. Yay! We both played very well. Then on Monday night, I have another straight pool match. A toughie. One of the top shooters in the league.

I show up Monday, knowing full well not to have any alcohol and not to eat until after the match, and I wear very comfy clothes (all recent reminders).

I walk in and a friend says to me, "What's up straight pool champ?"

"F*** You," I snap quickly.

"Oh, is that how it's gonna be?"

"Yep," I reply, with a scow on my forehead. We are friends and I can say that to him, but it still ruffled my feathers he said that, when I *think* he's making fun of my 0-3 deficit.

I'm already not very happy about having to play my opponent. I forgot my ipod and I know he's gonna say things to get under my skin. Already perturbed on the whole drive there. But, I'm not nervous. Which is a very good thing.

My friend Rebecca and I had discussed over chat earlier in the day how people say things before a match so they can use that later as their excuse. I wondered if my recent blogs sharing my nervousness about potentially losing affected me?

I went into the match with a determined attitude. No nerves. I was very standoffish, as I didn't want to communicate with my opponent.

I knew I had just played well on Saturday in the scotch doubles tourney, so I had more confidence than in my previous matches.

My opponent tells me to put my cue together and hit some balls and to let him know when I was ready.

"I'm ready."

He doesn't hear me.

I put my cue together, start to move balls into pockets and reiterate, "I'm ready."

He states, "normally I put my cue together and try and figure out which end is which by hitting balls. You don't want to hit any? Really?"

"No, I never do," as I move to the front of the table to lag.

He also walks to the front of the table to lag, and he says under his breath, yet to me, "You never hit balls before a match."

"Sometimes I do, yes."

We lag, I win.

I put our names in the wrong spot but do not realize it til I sit back down from my opening safe and he's scratched our names and switched them around. I immediately feel embarrassed. I have to get the feeling out of my body and I tell him, "I'm so used to losing the lag, that's why I put our names in the wrong spot," I share as my excuse. When in reality, I'm just not thinking straight.

He doesn't reply.

He misses his first shot and I make three balls then play safe. He misses a safe and I run 12. I then go up 22-0. Twenty two to zero! Against a good player!

I am playing well, but remind myself not to think ahead, like I had in my last three matches were I was ahead in the beginning of each match. I can tell I'm more mentally strong and very aware of my mental thoughts. But, I'm also playing well. Staying down, following through. Felt good. :)

I'm up around 39-17 and miss a long shot and he says to me, "That's only the second shot you have missed."

I don't reply, but as I sit down I think of the perfect too-late comeback! "Well, that's 2 too many misses!" I say in my brain. lol.

I know his comment can be a shark technique, or more so, it can get to a player if they start to think too much about how they are playing and that can throw their mechanics off. But, I don't let it get it to me.

I'm ahead 54-33, 62-35. But, he rallies and runs 10 and 15 to get within 5 (66-61). I tell myself that rallies are normal, and to not let it get to me. I also tell myself that if he wins, that's ok! Because, I am finally freaking playing good in a match this season! I was so happy I was finally playing well, I honestly could care less if I lost or not. I already prepared in my mind that thought to share with him after he won. lol.

As I'm sitting at the table, I notice a piece of paper with our schedule. He has many names scratched out and "W" 's next to most of the names. I'm thinking, "did he really already play all those matches? Does that W really mean a win? Has he really won that many matches?" I tell myself that can't be right, lol. I don't know what his scribbles mean.

I didn't look at the score or notice I had him down so much, because I rallied last year from a 30-35 deficit to beat him so it wouldn't surprise me if he returned like that.

He ran 9 and had a great side pocket break shot and he missed it! I was very surprised! He tells, "Go ahead and pick out a few balls" or something like that. He was not happy. He had just opened up the rack. I run 13 and the score is 79-73 me.

Then he runs 12! Score 80-85 him. He's passed me up.

My League Director tries to check out the score sheet and I tell him, "I'm trying to concentrate." I don't want any distractions and don't want to be perturbed. Usually I just tell the nosey's the score, but today I don't want to entertain anyone during my match - trying to focus and have my mental toughness hat on.

He plays safe and I try to play safe back but leave him an opening. And...he's about to win. :( There are 14 balls on the table and he only needs 15 to win, so just know I'm about to lose. He makes 4 balls, but then misses. OMGoodness!

I grab my cue quickly and confident, but still take my time and run 10. Safes back and forth and I'm up 93 to 89. He's at the table with a pretty open layout and again he can win with this turn at the table. But, he fouls and calls it on himself.

After we discuss if the ball get spotted or not (it does on a foul, of course), I run 7 and win 100-89!!!

I told him after thank you for calling the foul on himself, that not that many people would do that. He said that wasn't what cost him the match - it was the side pocket break shot he missed that cost him the match.

I was SO elated I played good!! A huge relief! And it was a bonus I won somehow.

The League Director tells me after that my opponent has played most of his matches already because he has to go to Australia and I was only his second loss. Really?? So, all those W's really were wins. But there wont be one next to my name. :)

Round Two Straight Pool Match Result (1)

2012-01-26T14:04:00.000-06:00

As I mentioned before, I had two straight pool matches last weekend. Going in with a 0-2 deficit, I was already worried.

This first match (Friday night), I lost. I played badly. Good in the beginning, but then I missed a lot of balls in the middle and end. And, since I wasn't playing well, I should not have gone for a lot of the shots I did. Further, I got hooked a lot, almost when it seemed I could make a come back. :(

I was up 26-10 and my opponent, Turtle #2, mumbles to himself he can't believe we are in inning 13 and he only has ten points. He mumbled quite a bit during our match. Like when we had to use the back of the score sheet, he mumbled that meant we had already played 50 innings.

A couple of friends (Dane and Beth) showed up to watch and I didn't feel uncomfy about them being there at all, but I did feel uncomfy about other things. For instance, I ordered my dinner (grilled chicken and carrots) and I realized that distracted me. As soon as the food arrived, I didn't play as well.

Turtle #2 almost rallied and the score is close 47-38, then he passes me 60-62. I rebound and go ahead 77-69 (whew) and I take a bathroom break and feel very relieved. I guess I felt too comfy? Not sure, but he ran 9 and a several 4s while I struggled to find shots... and then lost 88-100.

We started the match at 6:30pm and it ended about 10:00pm. Wow. But, we played a lot of safeties back and forth a lot, too. It really was a good match. Just wish I would have played better. :(

I lost because I played bad. I missed too many shots. I reflected a lot after the match. I was really upset, but also trying to figure what the heck was going on. It dawned on me that I was extremely uncomfortable. I wore a new shirt and kept tugging at it - throughout the whole match, even when seated. I didn't like the pants I wore either. I was determined to wear something very comfortable the next day for my scotch doubles tourney and that proved beneficial (we won!). I already know how important it is to dress comfortably, but I don't think I realized just how uncomfy my new shirt would be.

I'm not saying my shirt caused me the loss, but I really did not feel comfy and that is key. But, bottom line is I didn't play well. I missed too many shots. Furthermore, my mental game is on vacation. I was not mentally strong during the last three matches. And now I'm 0-3 for the start of this straight pool season. :(

I apologized to Dane and Beth for my bad play, lol. I admit, I was embarrassed. But, because they talked about my blog and that they follow me, I was anxious to tell them my upcoming schedule:

After this match, I had a scotch doubles match the very next day in Dallas.
Then WSOP Ladies Poker tourney on Sunday.
Another straight pool match Monday night (a toughie).
The next weekend the OB Cues Ladies Tour stop
The next weekend a scotch doubles tourney and a Ladies event in Temple, Texas
Then a weekend "kinda off" but on that Sunday I go to Reno, NV for a week for the Bar Table Championships (8bll, 8bll and 10ball tourneys).

Whew. :)

I explained to them that my busy pool schedule made me feel further stressed and worried about my recent bad play. A lot of tourneys coming up and I was playing badly right now. :( Possibly in a rut?

WSOP, What?

2012-01-25T14:07:00.000-06:00

I played in my first ever poker tournament last Sunday. AND! It was a ladies event. AND it was a WSOP circuit event!

Yep, WSOP - World Serious of Poker!

I have played a few poker tourneys online, but that was three years ago. I never did well and was way out of my element. I had no idea what I was doing, lol.

For the past 12 months I've played a lot of 1-2 Texas Hold'em No Limit games at the casino, but never in a LIVE tourney. So, on Sunday I felt nervous and anxious, and was very timid for most of the tourney.

I decided to play in this Ladies WSOP Circuit Event at the last minute mostly to live life to the fullest. To experience something new and cool! Maybe a bucket list item? I dunno. But, the circuit was only two hours from my house, so after convincing by a few friends and my b/f, I decided to play in it.

151 entrants, I lasted 5 hours, and placed 29th! They only paid the top 18, but I'm still very happy about how I did. Only made two bad plays, otherwise I feel really great about the whole experience! I was so excited to last that long in an important poker tourney! I was very giddy after the event, lol. It really was a cool experience for me. :)

I got lucky I had nice women at my tables. Only a few were intimidating, but then they got knocked out pretty quickly. Tough to go "all in" in poker tourneys!

Deal or No Deal?

2012-01-23T17:59:00.001-06:00

After my straight pool loss on Friday night, I wondered I how I would do in the big Scotch Doubles tourney in the Dallas area the very next day. I missed a ton of balls in my straight pool match, and afterwards reflected hard about what's been going on lately with my game. I just accepted the fact I guess I'm in a rut. Gotta fight through it some how. :( Ugh.

And for Saturday during the scotch tourney, I told myself to try and take my time on my shots.

I also informed my b/f (my scotch doubles partner) to not get on to me like the last debacle, and to just play pool and stop trying to play the game for both of us (we did well ALL the other times but that one tourney). He replies, "okay" as we walk into the Billiard Den this past Saturday morning for our tourney.

VERY long story short - play starts at noon and out of 31 total teams, we win several matches and then the hotseat match later that evening!

But, we have to wait around FOR-EVER to play in the finals. I mean, literally, hours. We finished the hotseat match at 10:30pm. We started the finals at 1:30am. Count with me, peeps - yep, that's 3 hours later.

WOW!

Of just sitting around. Waiting. After a long day already....

Just sitting around for 3 hours to play another match was tough to fade, I admit. But, I wanted to win the tourney and I felt we had a good chance (my b/f on the other hand had told me 12 hours earlier (on the drive to the pool room) that we were going to win it, lol).

We watched about 3 matches complete and then in the semi finals, one team is very tipsy and the other team played deliberate and slow. No reflection of their ability, because they all played very good - each person on each team! And, it went hill-hill. But, we had to wait for many matches to even SEE this semi-final, long match.

The slower team won and I walk up to the table to flip the coin. I'm ready to get this show on the road! It's 1:30am and I'm ready to play. First place is $430. Second place is $300. :) They would have to double dip us. Let's go!

But the male of the team wants to make a deal. Huh? Deal. What? He explains to me it's late and he wants to make a deal.

I told him, "Uh, I don't want to split."

He says, "I'm not asking to split, I'm just asking for a little deal so we don't have to play because it's so late."

I stand firm, "I really don't want to split."

"No, not split," he tries to reaffirm me, "just an agreement so we can go home."

"I don't want to. I want to play it out." I say uncomfortably.

He says, "okay then, we'll play."

My b/f comes out of the bathroom and I told him about the convo and what my stance was. He said the guy had already mentioned something to him about that during the semi-final match. He never said he would do a deal, but he was aware the guy was already thinking it.

But, my b/f told me he also wanted to play it out so he was good with my response.

Then the Tourney Director says she is going to use a shot clock because the matches were taking long and the play was slow. The guy tells her mater-of-factly, "That's why I wanted to make a deal." She responds with, "Well, it's their choice, they won the hotseat."

"I know, okay, let's play."

But, the discussion about the deal affected me. Thoughts kept running through my head during the final match:

"What if we lose and didn't make this deal?"
"What if we lose the first set, do we then ask for a deal?"
"I really want to play. I want to see if we can win."
"I would love another win under my belt."
"This is good experience for me. Doesn't his partner want to finish it out, also?"
"Should I have just made the deal?"
"Is it okay to want the money?"
"Is it bad karma I didn't make a deal?"
"What if we lose the match?"
"But I want to play. I'm ready to play."

All of these crazy thoughts are going through my head. During the match. The finals!

I realize people make deals all the time, and while I don't care how much money I make, I evidently really DID care after all. I didn't even want to give up $30. I wanted the $430 for some reason.

I also wanted to see if we could win, even though that conversation made me very nervous and uncomfortable, I still wanted to play.

Maybe chopping is a normal thing people do, but I would rather play it out. I had nowhere to be Sunday morning. I came this far and won the hosteat and I haven't won many tournaments in my life. Deal? NO DEAL.

Of course the shot clock affected us more than them (lol) because of some key decisions we had to take our time on, but we won 3-1! Undefeated! WOW! 31 teams and we won. :) $430 richer, too.

Thick envelope!

Even though my brain was "worried" about the ramifications of deal/no deal, I still played well and so did my b/f.

He and I played SO SO good together this tourney! It was awesome!

Also, I felt relieved that I played well, because of my recent bad play the last two weekends.

Maybe I'm not in a rut after all? Hmmm...

Vegas 2012 Scotch Doubles

2012-01-21T13:52:00.000-06:00

So, about a month ago I found out my boyfriend can't go to Vegas because of his job. I was extremely disappointed because we play scotch doubles REALLY well together and we were looking forward to placing well (or winning) the BCAPL Scotch Doubles Open tourney in May). :(

On the bright side, we found out early enough for me to be able to look for another partner in time.

A friend of mine who plays 8ball like I do and also plays very smart, would make a great partner and also we get along really well, but he and his wife aren't sure they are going to Vegas.

So, one day at league, as I mentioned in another blog entry, I asked one of the top shooters if he would like to play with me, if he goes to Vegas (I didn't know if he did or not). He said yes that day.

Then I called him a couple of weeks later to let him know that sure enough my b/f can't go to Vegas and would he still be interested.

He said he would love to.

A month goes by and I wonder to myself, "Does he really go to Vegas? Is this a for sure thing?" Due to the holidays and the league schedule, I haven't run into him.

And I don't really know the guy too well - only even seen him a few times - but since he has like 20 break and runs and is the top shooter in this large league of ours, I thought it would be a good choice.

I called him last night to verify, as I started to wonder if he was just being nice and said yes, or was he really going to go. I had never seen him in Vegas, so I wasn't sure if he even has been there before.

I call, he doesn't answer. He calls me back, I miss the call.

Finally we connect.

"Hey, just making sure we are still on for Vegas. And that you know the dates and are looking for flights and stuff."

"Yep, we sure are on still."

"Okay, just wanted to check."

"I'm.... " (muffled word)

"What?"

"I'm....."

Again, a muffled word.

"I can't understand what you are saying. Do what?" as I let out a few giggles with embarrassment.

"I'm driving."

"OH, you're driving! Really?"

"Yeah, haven't been to that part of the country and my cousin is going with me. Only about 18 hours. "

Well, I think to myself, that's a sure sign he's going, then! Whew! :)

Yay - a confirmation!

I tell him I will send in our singles and scotch doubles entries at the same time to make it easier and he was insistent on paying me up front.

Then he says kinda with a serous laugh, "I just have to ask, Why me?"

I was caught off guard! I'm like, DUH, isn't it obvious?

I replied, "I only play with players I think I can win with."

"Fair enough," he replies.

I thought it was so funny and kinda cool he asked that!

He adds, "Let's get together and hit a few balls sometime."

"Okay, sounds cool."

While I don't normally do that, since we don't know each other at all, can't hurt to spend some time together. But, him suggesting that shows how serious he is about wanting to do well. It also shows he's dedicating himself --he said he never practices pool at all.

He adds, " I just need a shot, something I can see." LMAO!

I hope I didn't pressure him by telling him I've placed 5th, 4th, and 7th. lol.

He is a funny guy, but I can tell he feels a little obligated to do well, if that makes sense. He has the confidence, and so do I. And we both play pretty dam sporty 8ball. We shall see how we do in May!

I think we will do fine but I wish my b/f was going... :(

Straight Pool, Round Two

2012-01-20T12:04:00.000-06:00

I have two more straight pool matches this weekend. One tonight and one on Monday night.

While I roll into the new season with zero wins (and two losses), I am about to play the two players who I came back from a deficit of 30-35 points to beat last season. That's pretty tough to do, imo. Yet, I somehow did it.

And now I'm going to play those two guys back to back, with already two losses to my record.

I'm nervous they are going to want revenge.

More nervous about being 0-4 or 1-3 at the start of the season. :( Maybe even embarrassed about it. But, it's not the end of the world, right? I MUST remember this.

I am determined to play my best, stay down, smooth stroke, take my time. TAKE MY TIME and enjoy my whole body being STILL as I execute my shot.

Do I want to win? Of course. Do I need to win? OF COURSE! lol. Do I really NEED to win? Not really, but I would love to.

Can I ask for a few good rolls, too? ;)

I'm also a little apprehensive because one of the two opponents talks a lot and makes snide comments throughout the match. I hope I remember my ipod on Monday! He's very annoying.

I need to just not care about the win and simply be thankful I can play pool (thanks Matthew!) and remember (and be excited!) that my knowledge of straight pool really is so much better (thank you Phil Capelle, and Pat Flemming!).

And like my dear friend Mike G. said last weekend, "I get nervous b/c of the expectations that I put on myself to play my best. People always say go out there and just enjoy yourself. It is not an easy thing to do when one expects so much out of one's self.

As for your record over these past seasons, it is way above normal. You can hold your own against many players. Keep that in mind and play your best. It will come out positive."

Thank you, Mike!

The Love of Straight Pool - Photo

2012-01-19T12:10:00.001-06:00

This is on a friends truck. This pic doesn't even need words, it says it all!

Deflated

2012-01-17T17:38:00.000-06:00

I'm trying to figure out what exactly is going on with my pool game.

I did surprisingly well the first weekend out of hibernation (last lady twice while playing real good with a smooth stroke, good pre-shot routine, and taking my time on my shots) to all of a sudden not winning games I'm suppose to win just two weekends in a row later.

I won a ladies event on a Friday night, but there were only 5 total females in the tourney. Then the following day in scotch doubles I play badly and only get 3rd place. Then play league and should have won 5 outta 6 games, instead lost 3.

The next weekend I play two straight pool matches and I lose both of those. To players I can beat if I'm playing well.

I am more than deflated and upset right now.

I seriously feel like a kicked dog.

I wanted to start my new straight pool season off with a few wins. I want the league trophy so badly, I want the wins so badly! I could use that desire as my excuse - I kept my eye off the ball in front of me and was thinking of the future - but I know that's not true. What IS true: I am not playing my best and I am not taking my time. My pre-shot routine is off.

I started off both straight pool matches on fire, only to not "stick it" to my opponents when I was ahead. I let up, started to think too much, didn't play my best, let the matches slip away.... blah blah blah.

I lost the first straight pool match Friday night 100-77.

At the end of the second match on Saturday morning, a friend stopped by to watch me. Score 75-75 when he walks up. A few safes back and forth, and I leave my opponent a window by accident and he runs 8. I foul. He runs 8. I then miss two very key shots (break shots) and he runs 6 and beats me 100-81. I was up 42-18 earlier in the match, too.

But, starting off well means nothing if you don't cross over the finish line. :(

My friend who watched the end of my match shares with me that I played all the right shots... I simply missed two important balls, and messed up that one safety.

Both my opponent played well toward the end of the matches, but if I would have taken advantage of their misses in the beginning-to-mid part of the game, I just know I could have won both. It burns to lose to peeps you feel you can beat, esp since the wins means so much to me in this league. :(

I felt relieved my friend said I played the correct shots. That's gotta count for something, right? He's one of the top shooters in the higher division so to hear my choices were correct made the loss sting a tad less.

But, to stop being negative for a moment..... I can tell the straight pool DVDs I have been watching have really improved my route to the break shots. I feel ecstatic about that part of my game! But, you can't tell any of that by the score and my ZERO winning percentage so far for the season. ARGH!

I am extremely upset. (can you tell? lol)

And, I'm scared right now, too. I am timid to even schedule another straight pool match; scared of the consequences.

I know I need to not care about the wins.

I know I need to focus back on playing each shot to my fullest potential. Key in on that object ball last to help me stay down. Take my time, too.

As frustrating and debilitating as the losses were, it was weirdly "fun" (dare I use that word) to try and overcome my nerves and the score and test my mental toughness to try and fight back in those two matches. I haven't played competitively in a while! It felt good, even though the losses hurt. Ohhh, reminds me of that quote, "no pain, no gain."

Maybe I have some fight left in me after all?

BTW, 4 big tourneys in 5 weekends coming up for me. I better prepare by envisioning my good pre-shot routine over and over in my mind during the weekdays, huh?

January 2012 PoolSynergy

2012-01-15T08:55:00.009-06:00

PoolSynergy's January's Topic is hosted by NYCgrind.com:

"There are numerous pro athletes, entertainers, and other celebrities who are pool enthusiasts. What kind of potential (if any) do you see for celebrity star power to influence media exposure for the pool world? I really believe that we can all have a positive influence in bringing new eyes to this sport with this next post."

I am normally an optimist, but with topics like this, I am afraid I'm not.

While I don't know what will ever make pool popular, I simply don't believe that if celebrities played pool on tv or at events, that pool will magically become mainstream. I think this way because I've already seen celebrities play pool at events, and that didn't bring droves of people into the pool room or pool leagues.

Would I like them to, sure. Would I like star power to help raise the popularity of pool? Absolutely.

But, I don't think it's the answer.

While I don't know what the answer is, I suppose more and more celebrities that play pool definitely wouldn't hurt our sport.

However, the only people who get excited when a celebrity plays pool are pool players. If non-pool players see Shaquille O'Neal play pool, they don't run and buy a pool table.

If a popular actor maybe was hired and many commercials were run where this celebrity tried to sell certain pool tables, then I think more pool tables would be sold to non-pool players. But would the increase in people buying tables make pool mainstream all of a sudden?

Let me ask you this way. If Brad Pitt or Beyonce' or Mathew McConaughey or Pamela Anderson was in a commercial, that aired on all the tv channels and during big time events to try and convince us to buy a Foosball table or a certain special dart set, would that all of a sudden mean darts and/or Foosball would be shown on major networks and tens of thousands of dollars thrown into their tournaments?

Nope.

Even if I saw my favorite musician or favorite actor playing shuffle board, it wouldn't get me into that sport.

Like I said, I don't know what the answer is. But we need more than star power for pool to become mainstream.

IMHO.

Decisions Decisions

2012-01-13T17:21:00.000-06:00

I can't figure out if I should go to both ACS and BCAPL this year or not. They are back-to-back National tourneys held in Vegas in May (in case you didn't know).

I wanted to last year, and even sent in early my entry fees for both tourneys, but backed out of ACS due to my Mom's health. I didn't want to be away from her for that long.

She passed away in August :( (btw, it feels like it's been sooooo much longer than only 5 months) and therefore I could feasibly go to both this year.

My concern is taking two weeks off from work. While I have the vacation time, is it good to be away from work for that long? I suppose I will still be connected via laptop and phone, tho.

Additionally, the flight prices keep going up. Do I risk buying a plane ticket now on one of the few remaining legs at the price of $150 (outbound) or do I wait until I firmly decide? If I miss getting a good price, it goes up by almost $75. Seems every day one of the outbound flights that was about $150 goes up to $225 (that' with tax). So, I feel pressured to make a decision asap.

I will always attend the BCAPL, but I'm interested in playing in the ACS National tourney, too. Further, next year I will most likely not play in both tourneys (only BCAPL), so that is another factor in my decision for this year to go to ACS Nationals, also.

Oh, the unknowns of what to do and the indecision's!

Ugh!

New Straight Pool Season Starting....

2012-01-11T18:30:00.000-06:00

And I'm nervous.

Yep.

Am.

My new straight pool season is upon me... and the top guys I couldn't beat the last few seasons have been all moved up to the upper division. BUT - there are still a few really tough opponents left, and all the other matches wont be easy anyway (never are).

To be the top player in my division and win that little dang trophy would mean SO much to me! I can't even put into words what an accomplishment it would mean to me. It would be a life-goal achieved!

But, being already nervous, wont help me much. I know that from experience.

I have two matches planned for this weekend, I truly hope I play okay and start the season off well.

I have been watching straight pool DVDs - Phil Capelle's new straight pool DVD and Pat Flemming's Accu-Stats instructional straight pool DVDs. They each discuss my problem areas - key balls and break shots. I feel more comfortable, but how will I do at the table this weekend?

And, the season is early and yet I'm already nervous! :(

It's amazing how I perceive the possibility of achieving "titles" and achievements - I freak myself out over the possibility, which is what we aren't suppose to do - think ahead. Only think of the present moment and my pre-shot routine.

Gosh I hope I remember that.

Scotch Fall

2012-01-11T15:10:00.001-06:00

I entered an 8-ball scotch doubles tourney last Saturday and my boyfriend and I failed miserably. :(

We usually play well together, but not all days can be good pool days, huh?

We didn't click for some reason and I also upset him with my choices a lot. He expressed his disappointment, which never helps me. I'm already upset at myself and embarrassed when I miss, so it really doesn't help to point things out to me. I'd rather focus on the positives or be lifted up.

I did miss a few keys shots and made mistakes because I over thought, and I admit, I just wasn't on my game this day. So, the combo of my bad play and he not playing up to par either further complicated things by us not "gelling." So, it was an unpleasant day for me (and him, I presume).

Eventually, I became too unsure of myself, fearful of the repercussions I guess. I wish we just played pool like we had in previous tournaments where our lowest finish was 2nd place (three 1st places and one 2nd place in all the scotch doubles tourneys we have entered).

We placed 3rd and while 3rd place seems good, it's not good to us! And, we could have won and should have easily won. :(

I told him I don't want to have another day like that again. LOL.

We have another scotch tourney Jan 21 - this one even tougher. My only goal is to have a pleasant day. :)

Cheering Against You

2012-01-03T17:36:00.000-06:00

Two night ago I went to Vino's in Hurst, Texas where they have a little 8-ball bar table tourney on Sunday nights.

They pay Last Lady (LL), so it's a cool little tourney for me. The prize for LL is $5 per female who enter the tourney, and on this night out of 31 players there were 10 of us. Wow! That's $50. :) Also, Vino's adds $5 per player, too, so it's a tough tournament.

I played in this tourney a few weeks ago and beat a kinda cocky guy so I'll call him Mr. Cocky. I play pretty good eight ball, so to beat a cocky player is always cool, I admit. :)

Since I didn't drink this particular night, I had a good shot at getting LL, but I still had a tough road ahead of me and had to play smart. It was definitely no gimme.

I won my first 3 matches, but one of them was a bye, so I didn't get credit for that for the LL tally. LL is decided by how may games you win.

So, for my first one-loss side match, I'm tied for LL with one other girl and I feel some pressure, admittedly, to get that $50. I'm also playing for 5th place (and they only pay 3 spots).

I play a real tall fella (Mr. Tall) whom I hadn't seen before, but he knew all the people by our table, who were watching him. It's a race to 1. Yes, I said One. Lol. So, it's an important game - I either move on AND win LL, or tie LL and have a playoff with the other girl.

I am playing pretty good and smart, but he only has two balls left on the table when I try to play safe. He goes for the only shot I left him (a cut shot in the side) and he makes it and all of a sudden his friends start clapping and cheering and carrying on! Mr. Cocky is cheering loudly and they are all going crazy over this cut shot.

I was trying to figure out what was going on and why they were so excited.

I could feel the adrenaline rising through my body as I tried so hard not to let it get to me. It *felt* like they were against me, but I knew in my heart that wasn't the case. But it still didn't mean the cheering didn't pierce my heart and hurt.

He missed the next shot and I ran a few balls but had to play safe again, this time on the 8-ball. I thought I would leave him a bank, instead it was a cut in the side. I knew as soon I was walked away from the table he could make it. I hoped he would still miss it, though (lol), but instead the 8-ball went right into the side pocket.

And his friends start to cheer and clap again. Mr. Tall high-fives Mr. Cocky as Mr. Tall is celebrating and I stand there with my hand out ready to shake, and my blood starts to boil from my emotions of them going crazy over the stupid 8-ball shot. Everyone over there is cheering him and saying what a great shot it was and he finally comes to the table to shake my hand.

I go to the bathroom to wash my hands before my playoff for LL and as I stand there rinsing my hands, I tell myself, "Don't let if bother you, Melinda. You know they weren't rooting against you, they were just rooting for him." While I was told this golden nugget of information a long time ago, and while my brain is aware of that (esp since I reminded myself of it), it still doesn't mean it didn't sting. :( It hurt my little heart. :(

I was nervous I'd have to play on the same table in front of all those guys for my LL play-off, but I recovered and I won that $50. Yay Me!

As I stayed around til the end of the tourney to watch my boyfriend capture First Place, one of his teammates comes up to me at the end of the night and says, "You are the one to beat, obviously. Those guys went crazy when he played you, all that cheering and stuff."

"Yea, and it bothered me."

"But it just means they are trying to beat you badly. That you are a tough opponent."

"Do what?"

He continues to explain, "They went crazy clapping, but only when he played you. It shows they all wanted him to beat you. Because you are a good player."

I liked his perspective! I hadn't thought of it that way and that made sense why it seemed they cheered more when he played me than his other opponents. :)

I love differing perspectives that help me figure out situations, because as we all know - we can't read minds and we take others actions wrong sometimes.

Maybe I need to give myself more credit as a top female player in these tourneys.

And I hope I remember this golden piece of info also the next time people cheer and clap for my opponent.

Ahh... perspectives!

Drinking and My Pool Game

2012-01-02T18:32:00.000-06:00

One of the benefits of going out and wanting to play pool again is I get "material" for my blog, lol. And last night was no exception. I will write another post soon about the final match I played last night, but first let me tell you about my second match.

Because I want to focus on my pool game again, I know I can't drink during the weekly tourneys, if I want a decent outcome. If I drink while playing pool, I lose many of my talents I've worked on for so many years - my preshot routine goes out the window and my ability to figure out patterns and smart shots follows my preshot routine right out that same window. lol.

Because I hadn't really cared about pool the last few months, I had been drinking during these weekly tourneys. However, last night (and Friday when I got Last Lady) I didn't drink during the tourney.

I get a bye and then win against a formidable opponent who played good safes. As I waited around for my next match (31 players, 4 tables = long wait), one of my friends' boyfriends comes up to me and looks at my drink in the tall plastic cup and says, "What is that?"

"Diet Coke."

"Diet Coke? You aren't drinking?"

"No, trying to focus on pool. And I can't play very well if I drink."

"Oh. Hmm. Not even a shot?"

"A shot? Maybe later."

"You sure?"

"Yea. Thanks, though."

He then confesses while laughing, "I'm only asking because I play you next."

I laugh as he walks away.

Then his girlfriend shares after I beat him, "He said he only beat you last time because you were pretty tipsy, so he was hoping you were drinking tonight!"

See? Proof I can't play pool and drink at the same time! People are even rooting for me to drink! lol.

BTW... placed 5th (no money), but got $50 for Last Lady! :)

Break Shot Patterns Vid Helped

2011-12-31T14:04:00.000-06:00

As you prolly figured out, I haven't really played pool the last two months.

I have either just had non-pool things going on Nov/Dec during the weekends (when I would normally play in Fri/Sat night tourneys), or been staying in my cocoon, away from the real world, being a hermit. The holidays were tough without my Mom. But I also played more poker the last two months, which kept me away from pool. I just didn't feel like playing pool - wasn't interested in being around certain people at the pool room, either.

But now that my Straight Pool Season starts in January, and I have 4 big pool tourneys coming up in Jan/Feb, I know have the pool bug back!

I decided to check out the new Video from Phil Capelle and watched almost 50 clips of straight pool break shot patterns before I headed to the Friday night weekly tourney.

If you haven't heard yet from your friends or read in billiard magazines, Phil has a new book/video called Break Shot Patterns where he shows how the pros would run the last 5 balls in straight pool matches (via a book AND 110 video clips!). As we all know and have heard, straight pool helps all your games - and so Phil's new DVD is no exception.

I don't know how Phil complied over 100 break shot patterns, as I can only imagine how long it took! It's definitely a labor of lover, for sure, and we all get to reap the rewards of his efforts!

To watch so many awesome break shot patterns by the pros, was very inspirational. I haven't even watched all the video clips yet, but just the 50 or more I saw only makes me eagerly want me to watch the rest of the DVD! And REWATCH it!

I played in a 9ball tourney last night and wasn't sure how I would do with almost two months off from playing pool.

To my surprise, I played pretty good! I scratched too many times on freaky shots, but otherwise, I stayed down on my shots and looked a lot at the correct shape for the cue ball.

I kept in mind what I had just watched on the videos. I noticed how the pros would take their time even on straight-in, simple shots. I recalled this as I played and didn't take "easy" shots for granted.

I also noticed how the players would walk around the table a lot to ensure where they needed the cue ball. It's very crucial to ensure you are on the correct side of some balls, so you can get to your next shot best.

I *think* I assume a lot when I play, and last night (when I kept in mind what I had watched on the videos), I looked at my position more and didn't assume that I would be okay moving the cue ball to a certain "area" on the table.

So, watching the all those video clips Phil compiled, I'm convinced, helped me play decently in the tourney last night, and also enjoy the game. I, more, than anyone was surprised when I got Last Lady and also third place!

Thank you, Phil Capelle!

Moving to the Rio

2011-12-29T11:09:00.000-06:00

I'm sure you've heard by now that the BCAPL will be moving their famous 8Ball Nationals tournament from the Riviera Casino to The Rio Casino in 2013.

While many people applaud this, I am one of the few who love The Riv, so I was actually a little disappointed with the news.

You see, I am a huge creature of habit and so I love all the little things everyone else prolly can't stand about The Riv. I don't mind the rooms at all and plus, I get a good room rates because I have a Player's Card. I also like the food at Kady's (even tho most people don't). And the food court is nice and conveniently located. It's also nice to already know where everything is in the casino, hotel, and convention area. :) Further, I like their table games and the dealers have always been nice and it's cool to see them again every year.

This news especially saddens me because the new owner has made so many awesome changes already, I can't wait to see what he has in store for us in 2012!

And.... most importantly.... I have a lot of casino gambling history with The Riv. I do most of my gambling there so I can get good rates for the room the following year. Staying there ten days, I'm always looking for deals! My Riviera Player's Card (every casino has a frequent player's card program) has earned me free nights and comp meals. So, I'm saddened my casino play at The Riv in 2012 wont help me get good rates at The Rio in 2013. :-(

But then.... I noticed something awesome the other day!

As I was trying to find a good deal at a casino for the Mosconi Cup in Vegas with the two main player programs I have (M Life and Total Rewards)... guess what? YEP - The Rio is under the Total Rewards players program!

I am so excited now!

That means I already have a a player history and that also means when I go to the associated casinos of the Total Rewards program, I will be able to use that play toward a cheaper room rate at The Rio! Woo-Woo!

BTW, in case you are interested, all these casinos below all have the same Player's program (Total Rewards) and what you earn can be used at any of these locations:

Horsehoe Casino
Caesars Palace
Planet Hollywood
Rio All-Suite Hotel & Casino
Harrah's Las Vegas
Paris Las Vegas
Flamingo Las Vegas
Bally's Las Vegas
Imperial Palace

Similar Cues

2011-12-28T14:48:00.002-06:00

I heard this awesome rumor about one of the one pocket players at one of the pool rooms I go to. I told him I wanted to showcase his story on my blog. The catch was... I needed to somehow figure out to show up when he had both his two cues with him.

I know, many people have more than one cue. So, what's the big deal?

Well, how many have two cues like THIS?

He bought a Szamboti in 1978. If you don't know what a Szamboti is, let's just say it's one of the most expensive and yearned-for cues by collectors and pool generations of its time.

After he bough the cue in 1978, he then bought Schon in 1987.

BUT!

He had the same exact inlays of the Szamboti put into in the butt sleeve and the forearm of the Schon. He even put the inlays in himself.

So, the cues look very similar!

He uses both, but you never really know which one he's using that day when he spars in his one pocket games (unless you know what to look for).

Check out the pics of the two cues: Pretty darn cool!

(click on images to enlarge)

My Favorite Mosconi Cup 2011 Shot

2011-12-27T13:48:00.000-06:00

During the Mosconi Cup in Vegas in December, when Chris Melling and Darren Appleton were playing doubles against Rodney Morris and Shawn Putnam, I saw my favorite (and most impressive) shot of the tourney!

The score was close: Europe up overall 4-3 against USA (in a race to 11) but this match was tied 5-5 in a race to 6! Very, very crucial hill-hill match.

Darren broke and... almost scratched!

Although the cueball didn't fall into the pocket for a dreaded scratch, instead, it nestled BEHIND two balls near the corner and Chris Melling was left with several options: Push Out or try to hit the 3 ball.

As SOON as Chris walked to the table, I saw him motion for a third option: Kick Safe.

I turned to Amanda and exclaimed, "no way!"

Darren and Chris asked for a time extension and added 60 seconds to their discussion. Chris told Darren that's what he wanted to do and Darren checked it out and presumably said, "Go for it, Chris."

The announcers thought Chris was going to try and kick at the 3 ball to make another ball near the pocket, but I saw Chris's first inclination to the shot as he motioned the Kick Safe as soon as he walked up to the table.

Check out what happened via the video below:

What impressed me most was he executed exactly what he envisioned in his mind. And further - the shot came immediately to him and he had a lot of confidence to pull it off!

Funny Straight Pool Moment!

2011-12-23T13:52:00.001-06:00

One night I was playing in a straight pool match against a very serious player. I was ahead by about 20 and on the verge of winning in a rack or two, so even though I was ahead, he could still win.

I left myself with the below: I ensured that I could get by the rack to see the 6 ball as a break out ball. He racked while I went to the bathroom.

When i got back, I grabbed my cue and chalk and walked up to the table to break and was dumbfounded! OMG! This is where I found myself:

I couldn't see the 6 ball after all! I could have sworn I double checked I would be able to make the 6 from where I left the cueball!

I stood there speechless, and then my opponent walks up to the table and says, "just kidding, I racked it low to trick you. Here, let me re-rack it right. HeHe"

LMAO!

Although what he did was super funny, I think I am more shocked that he did this during a kinda stressful match where he wasn't winning, and because normally he's so reserved and pensive.

I guess Mister Serious isn't that serious after all!

My Third One Pocket Video - Frozen Balls

2011-12-21T14:51:00.000-06:00

I realized yesterday I hadn't yet posted Chapter Two of my One Pocket videos on my blog for you all. Sorry about that!

But first, a shout out to our video editor at PoolStudents.net (Steve) for helping us so much!

In this third video (which is Chapter Two for the One Pocket series over at PoolStudents.net), I talk about how to make frozen balls.

I learned this from Phil Capelle (well, not personally, but from one of this books) and this helps me in ALL my games, but esp one pocket because balls are more congested in that game.

If you weren't aware of this, I hope it helps you as much as it has helped over the years! Enjoy. :)

btw.....

In case you are new to my blog, some background: I am one of the contributors over at PoolStudents.net. I am honored to have my very own little section! And I focus on one pocket over in my little corner.

But the clever catch is, it's only via video! The whole site smartly focuses on video - the dream of the originator of the site.

Press Release Back Fire - There is no I in Team

2011-12-20T14:32:00.000-06:00

As I mentioned before the Mosconi Cup, there were several unhappy people that Charlie Williams was the team captain of the USA Team.

But then!

I shared with you that I heard during the Mosconi Cup that Charlie was the hardest working USA Team Captain they had ever seen. We all wouldn't know that, because it's behind the scenes, but that's what was told by one of the Matchroom guys.

I thought that was really nice to hear, because I know the USA Team Players felt like Charlie was a good captain, but to hear that other people recognized how hard he worked, truly reinforced it.

Further proof: you can view a blog about the togetherness at this link (Captain's Log): http://www.pro9.co.uk/html/article.php?sid=1816&mode=&order=0

But, imagine my surprise at the end of the Mosconi Cup when each team was asked to say a few words. Captain Williams shocked the whole audience by saying, "...no discredit to the European team, but we really felt we got a little bit worse of the rolls sometimes."

What? Who in the heck says something like THAT?

You can hear for yourself he got BOO'd from the crowd for saying such a thing (listen about the 7 minute mark): http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wL8CYhxa07w&list=UUZVCbGKNydmAIqpRQxKUZsQ&index=5&feature=plpp_video.

BTW, the Europeans had nothing ill to say and ONLY complimented the USA Team.

Captain Williams (finally) complimented the European Team but then tried to remove his foot from his mouth and added "don't take it the wrong way" (about his rolls comment). But the damage was done.

Or was it?

Barry Berhman (for whatever reason) issued his thoughts on the Mosconi Cup and they were posted on AZB as a headline. I wondered why he would say anything at all and was quite confused about why he would comment like that anyway? Then I got miffed when he said, "To my two time U.S. Open Champion, Darren Appleton, you played great again this year. I am very proud of you and especially for being the gentleman and class act you are."

What?

"My U.S. Open Champion?" Isn't the U.S. Open really a tournament for the players? I realize you may think I'm playing schematics, but not many people with proper etiquette walk around saying a tournament is theirs. It's the players tournament. Sure, he's been running it for years and handles everything, but that wording is SLAP in the face (imo).

But I digress...

(sorry)

Well, evidently his comment and fan comments from forums ruffled the feathers of the USA Team and therefore the USA Members decided to issue a press release.

/sarcasm on/

Yay, a Press Release! How smart!
/sarcasm off/

The Press Release completely backfired. If they intended to explain themselves, it only did more harm than good.

Read for yourself. I'll wait right here.

Back?

Okay.

So, 9 times "I" was used by the captain in his paragraph. There is no I in Team. And like others who are expressing themselves on the forums, I agree it seems to be a Press Release about excuses of why the USA lost. Maybe they were trying to use the platform as a little sounding board, as most of the team seems a little upset (except for Johnny Archer who gave a great comment). But, where is the Public Relations person for this team?

Did not one person think about the consequences of how the Press Release was worded? Or were they too quick to want to (try) to defend themselves?

Even Charlie Sheen fired his Public Relations person... and shouldn't have.

I'm not knocking the Captain's preparation of the team, the togetherness, or the team camaraderie. But I admit I am disappointed in the speech and the Press Release (from Barry, also).

But, all this gives me something to express my opinion about, huh? lol.

We all learn from all mistakes. Just take these things as a learning experience, guy, and things will improve in the future. Learning isn't a bad thing!

Heat of the Battle - Mosconi Cup

2011-12-16T08:48:00.000-06:00

On Day 2 of Mosconi Cup 2011, when Shawn Putnam and Rodney Morris were playing Scotch Doubles against Darren Appleton and Chris Melling from Europe, Rodney got visibly upset. Being deep in the crowd, we couldn't hear what happened, what he was saying, or why he was upset.

However, being mic'd up, the entire TV audience could! And boy, did they get an earful from Rodney. Rodney was pissed!

Check it out for yourself: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GP-p51EwWsM

The USA Captain (Charlie Williams) even went over to say something to Darren and Chris and altho I have no idea what he said to them, he must have been trying to calm everyone down.

While checking Facebook that night, I ran across this from Darren's FB wall:

"Here's the story as all sorts of stuff getting thrown around.. Rodney was been a little disrespectful first 4 racks of match and nonstop talking when at the table, the Europeans guys were drinking so they started to talk back at him and he eventually took the bait.. He said something to me about our fans ..I just told him you brought it all on yourself and then he offered me outside in the parking lot ..I just simply replied grow up and it all spilled over for a while.. Rodney actually thought I said something different which I didn't.. I don't know what he was saying after as I couldn't hear him maybe you guys did,, anyway later he apologized to me ..it's all heat of the battle .."

The psychological parts of handling pressure is interesting to me. And we were lucky we were afforded the opportunity to get an explanation and to hear the different perspectives. Emotions run high. Things get carried away. People see things from a different set of glasses being under the gun and upset.

I hadn't seen the video above before reading what Darren wrote, but I thought it was nice of Darren and actually pretty cool of him to explain what happened, his version, that Rodney apologized, and he also offered the most important part: "It's all heat of the battle."

Pretty smart thinking on Darren's part to understand why Rodney got upset (the fans and being under pressure). I commend Darren for stepping up and explaining to the fans. I also commend Rodney for apologizing. Not easy to do sometimes, right?

(photos courtesy of Don Akerlow, of On The Break News magazine)

December PoolSynergy

2011-12-15T08:55:00.003-06:00

Michael Reddick is this month's host of PoolSynergy. You know - PoolSynergy! Where billiard bloggers blog about a certain topic each month. Michael gave us this topic for December: How do you recharge your batteries?

Well, I recycle mine. Wait. What?

Michael explains: Based on personal experience, there are times when I overload on pool and I need a break. Especially during the holiday season, there are other parts of our lives that can take priority...holiday celebrations that we want to attend (or are required to attend), visiting with friends and family, etc. What I'd like to know from the writers is what they do when they are away from pool...specifically, how do they recharge their emotional or physical batteries so they can come back to the table feeling physically and mentally refreshed and ready to play?

For me this answer is easy. When I need to get back into a pool mind frame, because maybe I've taken a mental vacation due to life's' hiccups or responsibilities, I simply set goals.

I normally do this at the beginning of the year (I don't like resolutions at all, instead I'm a goal-setter), which helps me get back into playing pool and wanting to compete after all the holiday fuss. But, other times I set goals after I realize my game may not be up to par because of the time off.

Most of my goals revolve around what I can do to improve my game. So, goals such as watching a certain number of videos a month or a goal to practice a certain amount of time each week, are best for me. These goals automatically get me back into the mind frame to play pool; to want to play pool. Especially when I've had to take a break, which means less time at the table.

Also, as the famous saying goes, "Absence makes the heart grow fonder" (by Eleanor Roosevelt), what I've experienced is being away from pool makes me anxious to play again. Therefore, the anxiousness automatically pulls me right back in and that makes it easy to feel refreshed and ready to play! :)

Sometimes that anxiousness takes time to come back, but when it does, you will be ready (it's like magic!).

Good luck!

2011 Mosconi Cup TidBits

2011-12-14T20:02:00.000-06:00

The Mosconi Cup was a lot of fun again this year. To see this event in person is awesome! I highly recommend you add this as a must-see to your Bucket List.

Altho the European team outplayed the USA Team this year, it was still an exciting event and a wonderful life experience.

It was held at the MGM in Las Vegas again, like it was in 2009 when I saw it for the first time. This year Amanda and I went and we had a blast seeing friends and watching pool in person being broadcast live on tv!

Amanda and I

Here are a few trigger-gems from the event:

On Day 2 of this 4-day event, USA Team Member Shawn Putnam was faced with a jump shot after a safety by one of the European players. Shawn not only jumped the ball cleanly to make contact with this 3-ball, he also cut it right in the corner pocket! The crowd went crazy! Right afterwards, someone from the crowd said, "Who says white men can't jump?" lol

I deemed Melanie Archer (Johnny Archer's wife) Head Cheerleader. She was awesome with her signs and cheering and getting the crowd to their feet throughout the event! She is a beautiful woman with a heart of gold. And their son and daughter made the whole crowd ooh and ahh with their comments, "Go Daddy!" or "USA" in their child-voices as they shouted out when Johnny was playing in his matches. It was absolutely adorable!

Melanie Archer

Johnny Lee Archer and LeeAnne Archer at the end of the event.

Although Rodney Morris got quite upset during one of his matches, I noticed during his matches at the Mosconi Cup that he is actually a very funny guy! He showed his fun personality as he played each day and he would make the crowd laugh with funny facial expressions, funny comments, or fun antics. I had no idea he was quite a character!
Ken Schuman is a friend of mine and a top-notch ref, but he can also be very blunt when it comes to reffing and ensuring people follow the rules. So, altho he might have rubbed people the wrong way in the past by being a stickler, he was VERY professional at this event and did a FANTASTIC job refereeing! His co-ref was Michaela Tabb, who is a hottie and famous all around the pool world. She was gracious to take a pic with me.

Michaela Tabb and myself.

I have seen Shawn Putnam at another event and he mostly complained, so I was quite surprised to see him smiling and laughing and having a great time at the Mosconi Cup. I guess it does make sense to be in a great mood for this event, but I was happy to see him play well during Scotch Doubles and keep the crowd entertained.

Mike Dechaine and Chris Melling were rookies for this event and it's quite an honor to play in a Mosconi Cup! They both played well and I was impressed with their play on Friday. Mike didn't fair too well on Saturday, but the entire U.S. team had trouble with their breaks Saturday, unfortunately. But Mike played great Friday and I could see why he was on the team this year. He did get upset on Saturday, but emotions run high in this event. Chris Melling from Europe is a fantastic player and I am honored to call him my friend. He played so beautifully. Chris lost his Mom and I told him how proud she was of him. I just know my Mom is with his Mom and they watched the event from Heaven together.

Chris Melling and I

There was one very loud European but he was also funny as he yelled "Gooo EuuuurOOpe" deep from his belly about 1,000 times, lol. On Day 3 he wore a Santa suit from head to toe and during the first break he came to the bar and said, "Santa needs a drink, It's a long ways from the North Pole." lmao! One of my friends told me they were impressed he hadn't got into a fight based the amount of alcohol he had consumed each day during the event, lol.

And altho I was one of the one's who didn't like the choice for USA Captain, I was told on Sunday that he was the hardest working USA team they had ever seen. We all wouldn't know that, because it's behind the scenes, but that's what I was told by one of the Matchroom guys.

Next year we go back to Europe and then in 2013 back to the USA. Hope it's in Vegas again - maybe I'll get to see it again! Love running into friends at this event. I had a great time!

Stream Thoughts

2011-12-13T11:00:00.000-06:00

Someone stated recently, "Streaming is the best thing to ever happen to pool."

I was like, "Huh?"

How is that??

Maybe I am biased, but I think some peeps will agree with me on some of these points. lol.

Streaming at first was huge and the big "thing" for sure. And, it still is sometimes, but is it really that big anymore?

Streaming itself is HUGE, for sure. I can watch sport events on my phone - pretty cool, huh? Technology allows us to no longer be in our own living rooms and watch sports or other events. Now we can be out having fun and also be able to watch our favorite programming at the same time.

And that is the key: Favorite programming.

How many pool players are out there in the U.S.?

How many know there is even a stream on?

If pool was as huge a basketball or football, I could see the incentive to stream more events. But pool is still not popular just because streaming came along.

I can't even begin to tell you the last time I watched a pool event streamed.

I fully admit if my significant other was playing in a tournament, I would pay full price immediately to watch him on a stream. But even free streams from local tours that showcase my friends in matches, I simply don't care to watch. I'm just not interested anymore. Huge money match-ups of big pro players? Nope, them neither.

The It Factor is gone for me for some reason.

The U.S. Open came and went. I could buy the stream. I didn't.

Even if the Mosconi Cup was streamed, I wouldn't buy it. If it was free, I would prolly watch it because it's a fantastic event to see! But otherwise, I'm just not interested anymore to watch regular pool tournaments on tv or streamed.

Maybe because my interests have changed or because I don't care anymore who does what in tournaments? I'm not in awe of the pros - I know most of them personally. I also am not home a lot anymore on weekends, so maybe that's a factor, too?

I dunno.

I'm just not completely sure why, to be honest.

I do know this: I am more interested in improving my 14.1 knowledge via DVDs than watching 9-ball matches on tv.

So, if I am home (key point) and there is a straight pool tournament being streamed with great commentators, I would fork over the all-weekend stream pass in a heartbeat because I want to learn that game so much right now. And I recognize that when I was enamored with one pocket a couple of years ago, I would watch streamed one pocket matches a lot more back then.

"But Melinda, what about being on the stream itself?" Ahh, I do enjoy playing on streamed matches. But for selfish reasons - so I can go back after the match to see how my mechanics are, and also for the experience of playing under pressure. I do love to help streamers - so enjoy commentating and being a part of the production of a "show."

But otherwise, what does streaming do for people?

People think streaming brings in sponsors. Phooey. I don't buy that. Do you? The people who put on streams have to go GET sponsors; the sponsors don't come running to them, knocking down their doors to be listed on a stream (imo). The streamers are out there trying to make a living, working their tails off to provide streams, trying to find sponsors.

But for who? The small fan base of pool players? Yep. Just little 'ole us.

And what does a tour get out of a stream? Does a tour somehow magically get money from the people who watch their tour on a stream? Sure, it *might* get a few more people interested in playing their event - but wouldn't a player already know about an event in order to know to watch it on a stream? And I've even heard of people NOT driving to watch an event in person because they can sit in their pj's from the comfort of their home to watch a tournament being streamed. This obviously leads to less money for the pool room.

And what does a sponsor get? Do they sell more products? Enough to offset the cost of being advertised on a stream?

Some tours have stopped streaming their events. And who complained? Sponsors? Fans? Nope. None. Just the players who like the awe factor of the stream.

Don't get me wrong, I don't think streams hurt our sport, but I don't think it magically puts money in peoples pockets, nor magically increases our fan base (unfortunately). And I definitely don't think streaming is the best thing to ever happen to pool. I wish that WAS true.

Just my opinion.

Maybe in the future something else amazing will come along and increase our fan base somehow. I surely hope so!

Photo: Protecting A Pool Table!

2011-12-06T14:36:00.000-06:00

At league a few weeks ago, a guy comes over to our side of the room and starts to cover one of the 7-foot pool tables with plastic bags.

Turns out he needed a pizza table!

I love people that protect the proper things in life!

Room Size For a Pool Table?

2011-12-06T13:30:00.000-06:00

Seems like once a year or more peeps ask via the AZB Forums what room size they should be looking for in a house to fit a pool table nicely. Since I am currently wondering myself, thought I'd share what I found out.

I found many suggestions and links, and actually EVERY link had different suggested requirements!

Good rule of thumb that many agree with: Add about 5 feet to each end of the table (no matter what size) and you will have enough space to play pool comfortably.

Just a quick note, if you only add 10 feet to the length and 10 feet to the width, people say you won't have space to stroke the ball if it is frozen to the rail. If you want to play and be completely comfortable without any problem, you really need about 15x20 for a 9 foot table.

If you don't have exactly 5 feet on each side but close to that, then see what the very minimum space required needed for a particular table size:

Seven foot table: 3.5' x 7'
(Playing area: 38" x 76")
13' x 16'

Eight foot table: 4' x 8'
(Playing area: 44" x 88")
13' 6" x 17'

Oversize eight foot table: 4' x 8'
(Playing area: 46" x 92")
13' 6" x 17' 6"

Nine foot table: 4.5' x 9'
(Playing area: 50" x 100")
14' x 18'

P.S. BTW, all measurements in this blog article are for standard 58" cues that most of us use daily.

Mosconi Cup Coming Up

2011-12-02T11:57:00.000-06:00

My bestest girlyfriend Amanda wanted a girl weekend so we decided to head to the Mosconi Cup in Las Vegas! We'll be leaving Thursday to watch the festivities live at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas. It's gonna be fun!

The Mosconi Cup is like the Ryder Cup of pool - USA players against European players. I was lucky enough to attend this event in Vegas two years ago (the venue swaps from the US to Europe every year) and I had fun watching a live broadcast of a huge pool event.

The made-for-tv room with one 9-foot pool table is surrounded by bleachers full of electric devotees and the audience is pumped up with the casino oxygen (just kidding) and the energy in the room is amazing, with clapping almost every shot, emotions from the players seen at every whisper, and banners showing support for their favorite team.

Just in case the tv camera catches a glimpse of me, I've got my hair done, botoxed my crows feet, tanned my bod, and my nails are finished (oh, who I am kidding - I do this before EVERY trip to Vegas, lol). The only thing I didn't accomplish is the 5 pounds I wanted to lose, but since I'm going to stuff my face at my favorite buffets anyway, it would have been pointless, lmao. Trust me, when it comes to good food, I savor it with all my might and take advantage (because life is short and to be enjoyed). Good food, good friends, good times!

This year, there is a lot of talk on the forums about the USA Captain. While there are 5 players, there is also a non-playing captain. The forums are lit up right now with their dislike and shock who was picked. Not because of his talent, but more so they feel there are better suited captains, mostly because of the character of the newly-appointed Captain.

When I attended in 2009, Nick Varner captained the winning USA team! It was awesome. Dennis Hatch was voted in and easily became the most enthusiastic player, played with more heart than I've ever seen, and easily won MVP. Too bad he wasn't chosen as Captain, or Nick Varner again.

Instead, the new Captain is currently playing in a World Mixed Doubles tournament in China (this week) - as he represents Korea. Huh?

I personally think that his ties to his business got him voted in (which isn't politically correct, but that's politics, right?). And that's just my opinion, btw.

Granted, I'm going to cheer on USA because I'm from the USA. The team is FULL of talent and rock solid. And I believe can win without a Captain --> Johnny Archer, Shane Van Boeing, Mike Dechaine, Rodney Morris, and Shawn Putnam can get the job done!

I can only imagine that if pool were as big as basketball / golf /football, that this new Captain would be addressing all the concerns being brought up about him, and possibly step down from "Captain."

But I'm goig to cheer on the USA! USA! USA!

Failed Test

2011-11-25T13:27:00.000-06:00

Sunday afternoon we played a very good team who should be in the top 5 of our league (if they aren't already). One of the teammates on this opposing team is the top player in our league. And we have at least 100 people on this league, so that tells you how good he is (and how often he plays).

I approached him about mid-way through the team match and asked if he went to Vegas. He said sometimes and I suggested if my boyfriend couldn't go, would he like to play scotch doubles? He said yes, he would be interested if Plan A didn't work out with me.

Is it obvious I'm picky with my scotch doubles players? LOL. I want the best possible players - I wont "settle" in team events, and that includes scotch doubles.

Cases in point: Last year I asked the top player in my other league if he could play with me in Vegas (we got 7th out of 385 teams). Year before that I played with a pro (placed 13th in the Masters division). Year before that - my scotch doubles partner and I placed 5th then 4th in consecutive years against about 400 other teams in Vegas!

My boyfriend and I play GREAT together and we do very well as a team. However, because I'm very competitive, I want a backup plan just in case he can't get off of work and then I wont have anyone good to play with come May in Vegas.

So imagine my surprise when I started to take shots during league (hey, they were having $2 shot specials!) and I missed an 8ball and then a 3-ball out my last two games and the guy comes up to me afterwards and was like, "uh, I dunno now." lmao!

He was picking on me, but it was pretty dang funny I preferenced my convo to him that I only play with good players and then I dog it!!

Reminds of me when I was being picky back in 2007 and I had to find an opponent at the last minute. Someone suggested Royce Bunnell of OB Cues but I didn't know how he played, so I told him I'd have to make him try out. He laughed and said he would, then I went to play a match and proceeded to dog two 9-balls!

He brings that story up to this day. (and btw, that was my partner who we scored 5th and 4th scotch doubles places!) :)

What Do You Look at Last?

2011-11-17T13:39:00.000-06:00

There is a "fun debate" going on over on the AZBilliards.com forums about what pool players look at last when they stroke. The Object Ball (OB) or the CueBall (CB)?

Everyone is going back and forth. And even other alternatives are being discussed (if you can imagine there are actually other things to look at last other than either the OB or the CB when you shoot a shot).

Some peeps are even sharing with us (in that discussion thread) which ball they think the pros look at last, too.

Here's all I know: when I started to look at the Object Ball last (about 1-2 years ago), my consistency in my pre-shot routine rose exponentially and I was able to stay down on my shots SO MUCH better (which obviously leads to less balls missed).

I don't know which is right or wrong, I'm just sharing what I now try to incorporate in my pre-shot routine and why it's been successful for me.

Season Finale Tourney

2011-11-16T12:38:00.002-06:00

The final stop of the 2011 OB Cues Tour Season was held the weekend of Nov 5th in San Leon, Texas at Casper's Billiards. I've already posted a cool video tour of this amazing pool room and also a neat video compilation of our road trip, but how did I do in the tourney?

After my first successful Texas State title win, how would I fair in my next big tourney? More importantly, what did I find out about myself and this lovely game of pool during the weekend of the Season Finale?

After a couple of league nights and a couple of weekly tourneys since my "big" win, I had already figured out that after you win a big tourney, you don't magically win everything from that point on. lmao.

And to top it off, the invisible pressure we put on ourselves is immense. I felt I had all eyes on me. "She just won a tourney, why isn't she getting out in this rack?" I envisioned my league mates and league opponents thinking. LOL. Invisible pressure is like a tightly wrapped invisible cloak - you are trapped in this blanket and can barely move yours arms properly anymore. It sucks, lol.

I didn't feel like I had the "It Factor" the morning of the Season Finale. The "It Factor" is me being numb to nerves or expectations. Instead, I was a little leery how I would fair, which is already a bad sign for me. I'm already "worried" or "concerned" and they hadn't even done the draw yet!

I admit, I was surrounded by great players. It was a very tough field. And let's face it, I haven't yet placed better than 4th in any OB Cues Ladies Tour Stop (ever).

About 45 ladies were eligible for the Season Finale but only 27 showed up. Members had to play in at least 2 stops during the year to be able to play in the Season Finale, where they added an additional $1,000 to the already guaranteed $2,000 event!

I am actually disheartened to realize I won the Oct tourney because I was in the zone. Sure, skill had something to do with it - I have years of experience, vast knowledge of the game, and obviously good mechanics when I'm on auto-pilot (the zone). But, it's kind of a somber/sober realization for me: I might need to be in the zone to do super well again.

Because we all know how tough it is to get in the zone. :(

What was reiterated loudly to me again at THIS particular tourney is if I have too much going through my brain, too much pressure on my shoulders, nerves filling my soul, and thinking ahead about possibilities, I cannot function well on the pool table.

And that my friends is the complete opposite of being "in the zone."

My arms get wobbly, my adrenaline races through my veins, my mind is full of so many different thoughts flying around at once, and therefore my pre-shot routine suffers and I miss shots under pressure.

Bottom line - I lost matches I could have won if I wasn't nervous or thinking too much. And I won the matches where I felt no pressure.

I finished in 13th place Saturday evening.

If I had a stronger mental attitude, I would have easily lasted until Sunday.

However, this "misfortune" then "granted" me the chance to play on Sunday in the Second Chance event. With 14 players, I look around the room and feel pretty dang good about my chances. I'm one of the better players in this field and so my confidence already starts to go up.

I won my first three matches pretty easy (and with one unlucky scratch by a competitor) to make it to the hotseat. I lost that match only hill-hill (I didn't focus toward the end and it cost me the match).

I got to the finals with a 4-0 win and then proceeded to win the first set in the finals also by a score of 4-0. But I lost the second set 2-4 because my opponent played better and because I didn't play as well. I just got tired and didn't focus as much; let things get in my mind again.

Tourney Description: Frustrated

As I watched some of the main event matches on Sunday afternoon, it hit me hard that the 8 ladies I witnessed competing had their emotions and thoughts contained. They were playing POOL. Playing well. Sure, they prolly felt a little nerves but the difference is they were able to contain their emotions to play properly.

I SO wish I was one of those girls playing on Sunday. I have been there before, but my mental toughness sucks right now! I hope it can get back where I know it can be. Where it has been in the past.

I'm frustrated with this game right now. It's so mental, and yet my mental game is mush right now.

I tried all my tricks over this weekend to get over my nervousness, negative thoughts, agitation, wants and desires, etc. I have so many tips I've learned through the years, but I just couldn't overcome my nerves and couldn't stop my brain from thinking too much.

In the tourney I won in Oct, I had no expectations and was just simply happy for every win, and didn't think ahead for wants or desires. I became almost complacent in my brain and simply felt joy and blessings where I was - AT THAT moment. Whether it was winning the first match, playing for third, happy to be playing in the finals, etc. No future thinking or pressure entered my mind. I simply played pool.

And during my "rough" matches in the Season Finale tourney, I tried to get that same "attitude" by reversing what was going on in my head and stomach by using tips I have learned through the years. I tried to tell myself:

Be happy you are even able to play pool
Breathe in long, deep breathes to slow my adrenaline
Enjoy my opponent (i.e. not be nervous against them)
Think of how many games I needed, not what my opponents' score was
Get on to myself - "Stop being nervous! Stop it!!"
Focus solely on my pre-shot routine.
Stop thinking ahead. Stop "thinking" of the ramifications of a win/loss.

I tried it all; to no avail.

Ugh.

Yet, I want to play in more tournaments.

But I admit - I am scared.

I am scared of my nerves and the invisible pressure getting in the way of me playing good pool. I'm scared of traveling all the way to Reno in Feb to only falter from mental mush.

People keep telling me to give myself some time. It's not even been three months since my Mom's passing and I'm going through a lot. Time heals and I suppose time is what I need to figure all this out.

That and MORE POOL!

But I will admit something else: I am confused. Why is this game so frustrating to me right now? WTHeck is going on? I've been playing pool for over 20 years? Why all of a sudden am I so confused and frustrated!? And where is my mental toughness dangit! Who has it? Give it back!!

November Thanks

2011-11-15T09:00:00.036-06:00

As host for PoolSynergy this month, since it's November I choose the topic "Thankfulness." Thanksgiving for the USA is in November, after all, so I thought the topic would be apropos. :)

I asked the PoolSynergy bloggers to wrote about what they are thankful about in regards to pool. Something they maybe learned, witnessed, experienced, etc. They were given free rein to talk about anything in regards to pool and what they are thankful for.

Markus Hofstatter wrote about great moments he had around the world, practicing, and people who he is happy to have in his life. Check out his blog entry here.

Gail Glazebrook surprised me by her thankfulness, yet it makes perfect sense (and now I wish I would have said this!). Read her thanks here.

Samm (Diep) Vidal talks about 10 wonderful things pool has brought into her life. She's always amazing at giving, and now check out what she's thankful for.

Alison Fischer gives us a look into her many years of thankfulness and I'm so glad she shared! She has a way with words I can only dream of. Read her article here.

Mike Fieldhammer also contributed this month and his thankfulness also surprised me. Check out his thanks.

Johnny101 is most thankful for the support and guidance he's received from people he's never actually met! Intriguing, huh? Read his article here.

John Biddle shares many thankful pool reasons, from family to authors and also thanks to other players. He's right on target, too. Read the details.

Gary Frerking gives thanks to attention-to-detail, how his Dad pounded it into his head, and how it's useful now. Check out his article.

And I (Melinda) wrote about Thanks, also. I thought everyone would say the same thing (always glad to be proven wrong in these instances!), and here is what I am grateful for: click here.

/pun on/ Thanks to all the bloggers for writing about Thanks! /pun off/ :-)

Hope everyone has a great month of Thanks and check us (Poolsynergy) out next month when Michael Reddick is our gracious host!

Thank Yous

2011-11-15T08:58:00.001-06:00

This months topic is simply: Thank you. What are we thankful for in regards to pool?

For me this is easy: I am thankful for pool because I have met amazing, wonderful, impactful people.

I met a woman in my mid 20s who helped me become more confident by taking an interest in my well being.
I have met so many wonderful, amazing women who have given me great advice during adverse times in my life.
I have met guys who became my boyfriends who captured many years of happiness.
I have best friends because I met them through the love we share with pool.

While co-workers and family may not understand why pool means so much to me, fellow pool players truly understand the passion.

They understand why pool makes me happy, challenged, and passionate.

They understand why I travel across the country to play pool, why I cry after I win a tournament, why at other times I get so frustrated.

I found love because of pool.

I have found heartbreak because of pool.

I believe that everything happens for a reason and everything in life makes us stronger, so I embrace all that happens, and for everyone that crosses my path.

As many fellow OB Cues Ladies Tour Members have said: attending tour stops is not about pool, it's about friendship. To get to see our friends, hang out with friends, getting our hugs, sharing our happiness, and getting consoled during life's hiccups. It's a family. Dysfunctional, fun, amazing family!

I truly have a family because of pool.

And I have so many great friends and loved ones because I met them through pool.

Who have helped me through so much in my life. That I will never forget, ever.

I honestly don't know if I would have this many friends if it wasn't for the love of pool that brought us together. And they help me through the tough times, share in laughter other times, and yes, I even am honored to offer advice or my experiences at times to help them.

Friends are my personal counselors through life. They lift me up with their words, help me leave the house with encouragement, take memorable trips with me, and help me laugh!

This is all why I'm very thankful for pool! What would I do without all my friends, and the love that fills my heart, and life experiences we share together?!

And don't forget to read ALL the Thank you PoolSynergy blogs by clicking here!

Video Compilation of the OB Cues Ladies Tour Road Trip Nov 2011!

2011-11-14T08:58:00.000-06:00

Video Tour of Caspers Billiards

2011-11-10T16:18:00.001-06:00

Thought I'd show you all Casper's Billiards via ala video tour blog. Casper's Billiards was home to the OB Cues Tour Season Finale held last weekend. Spacious, gorgeous, waterfront, two-story pool room with lots of beautiful 9-foot tables.

Enjoy!

So, Did I Accomplish No Tolerating?

2011-11-09T11:12:00.000-06:00

On Friday I posted I was going to speak up more and "defend" myself.

Then I went out of town to the OB Cues Ladies Tour Season Finale that night for the weekend. If you happened to wonder if I had any opportunities to speak up (when otherwise normally I wouldn't), the answer is: Yes.

Four times I spoke up. Four times! When in the past I may not have said anything, this weekend I did.

(pats myself on the back)

I never felt bad, I never felt guilty (as I said I also wanted to work on). I was kind, cordial, and simply spoke up because I felt it was necessary for my mental attitude.

(as we all know, pool is 90% mental)

I'll share 2 of the 4. Two seemed "minor," but the two below that I'll share are significant compared to how I would have non-responded in the past:

Situation:
On Saturday afternoon, a member was smoking near my match and she was only practicing on the next table and I asked her to move her cigarette. This may seem minor, but not one other person was smoking near the matches at this end of the room and so her smoke was very obvious (and bothersome) and I wanted to focus on my match (we are a non-smoking tour).

The Reaction:
She asked me if I was about to play on the table she was about to practice on. I said no, "but I'm playing right next to you." She moved her ashtray and cigarette to the other side of the table.

Previously:
I wouldn't have spoke up and instead been perturbed about her smoke which meant I wouldn't be focused on my match. As you can imagine, a smoke-free area all of a sudden "invaded" with a smoker is extremely obvious.

Situation:
Right before the finals of the Second Chance tournament, the TDs discussed moving the match downstairs. I expressed that we shouldn't change equipment because we had been playing on these tables upstairs all day. The tables downstairs were different and I thought a change in equipment should not occur right before the finals.

The Reaction:
They said we could continue to play upstairs. :)

Previously:
I wouldn't have spoke up and been ticked as I played the finals match downstairs on different equipment. Don't get me wrong - I can adjust quickly to tables, but I still would have been perturbed, which could have taken away focus from playing my best.

It all sounds so silly I know, but I'm proud of defending myself so I could focus on my matches. Right now I need all the help I can get for my mental mush. And let's face it - we all DESERVE to have great atmospheres to play our best and focus on the game we all love. :)

Video of Ming Ng Racking

2011-11-08T14:38:00.001-06:00

Hope my friend Ming doesn't mind me sharing this video I captured of her.

Ming (former WPBA professional) is a very competitive player but also an awesome friend and fills the room with laughter! She's a joy to have around because she enjoys life and has fun and also because I love to watch her compete because she's so talented and skilled at this lovely game.

But check this out! Ming is a little "vertically challenged" and the tables we were playing on last weekend were kinda tall:

Video of the Magic Rack

2011-11-08T13:31:00.002-06:00

Just in case you haven't used the Magic Rack, I did a little video to show how it works.

Enjoy!

Panoramic Pool View!

2011-11-07T14:58:00.000-06:00

Wow!

I would love to to be able to rent this for just a day and throw it up in the air in the middle of the Riviera Convention Center during the BCAPL Nationals! I think this would be SO neat!

Not Tolerating Anymore

2011-11-04T15:15:00.001-05:00

I have noticed when someone close passes away, that part of my personality changes. Either by choice or not, I'm not sure.

I noticed it after my Dad passed away. I was a "list" person. I wrote a list for everything. Had to have one. Couldn't function without one. After he passed, no more lists for me.

After my Mom passed, a different, more honest person came about. I don't mean I lied before. I mean, I no longer am going to hold back when I should speak up. I will still continue to be careful HOW I speak my words, but I instead of NOT saying something in fear of hurting others, I'm instead going to try and speak up.

I'll be honest: I'm tired of not speaking up for myself.

I'm tired of being agitated by people and letting them get to me.

For instance, the other day I played poker at the casino and the guy next to me took up the space under the table with his lanky legs. He took up too much space and was not considerate of others. And it annoyed me. When I do anything in life, I don't want to be annoyed. I want to be happy. Not distracted. Not my mo-jo messed up. Not my mind irritated and my forehead crinkly with dissatisfaction.

I mentioned it after-the-fact to my b/f and he says, "why didn't you ask him to move?"

Interesting concept.

I would rather not inconvenience the guy than say something.

One time a pool player's smoke bothered me while I ate.

They noticed and then finally said, "why didn't you just say something?"

I dunno.

Another time some friends made too much noise when I tried to sleep and they told me later, "why didn't you just say something?"

OMG... I don't know!

Why would I rather suffer than say something??

I just don't like to inconvenience people. I'm just too nice, I guess. I dunno.

I need to realize if I speak up it's not a bad thing and no one will be upset with me. And even if they get upset with me, who cares, right? I have a right to be in a happy place. Right?

I witnessed so many instances in the past where people reacted badly to "suggestions" that maybe I'm nervous to speak up?

I dunno, doesn't sound like me. I'm a pretty forward and confident woman.

And don't get me wrong - rile me up and I'll be the first to speak up (lol).

But, what I'm referring to that I want to work on is the atmosphere around my pool matches: I'm tired of people talking to me when I play pool.

I'm tired of people trying to be funny when I'm in the middle of a straight pool match.

I'm tired to people interfering with my mental game.

I realize I'm "letting" things bother me, but I can have a say so in my environment at times, right?

Like I mentioned in my blog article the other day: Some guy sat next to our straight pool match and made comments. I thought about asking him to leave. Thought to myself, "this is the right thing to do. It's okay to ask him to leave. It will allow you to focus on your game."

But I never asked him to leave because he eventually kept quiet. Until... my opponent rallied almost 25 points to tie the score. Then he thinks he's funny, "Let him catch up, huh?"

Omg......

Like I wasn't freakin' upset about it already?

I seriously don't understand people. Well, to be fair, people don't understand sports and that it's best to just keep quiet.

I've decided (since my Mom's passing) that I wont and shouldn't put up with people like that anymore. I am tired of letting things get to me. So, I will speak up more.

Not rudely, of course.

But I need to look out for me.

The difficult part will be my common concern: to be able to ask peeps to be quiet without upsetting MYSELF. Without making myself feel bad for saying something to them.

I don't know why, but I do feel bad for defending myself sometimes. And guess what? Yep, tired of that, too.

I've taken enough leadership classes to politely ask someone to STHU (lol). I can do it.

I have enough experience with being careful with my words so I don't hurt others. I do it all the time, actually. But that's usually when I'm giving advice or when someone asks me for my thoughts. I don't normally speak up for myself. So, this is new for me. Someones gotta stick up for me, right?

Let the practicing begin!

Headphones

2011-11-02T17:53:00.000-05:00

I have come to the conclusion that the only way to play my best against The Talker is to try not to listen to him. How the heck does one do that?? Lol. The only idea I can think of is to use my headphones when I play against him.

Hmmm....

Maybe that will work?

Maybe.

I decided I should "practice" using my headphones. Not practice with my headphones, but practicing using my headphones. I just don't want to show up one day to play him and had never used them before in a straight pool match.

I wanted to get used to how it felt. Make sure I feel comfortable. Figure out which hip to hook my ipod; how to finagle the cords to the headphones through my shirt.

Even though I may not play him for months (the next season starts in Jan), I wanted to practice early.

So, in my last 5 straight pool matches, I used my ipod 2 1/2 times.

I have always felt a little semi-self-conscious when using headphones. I feel it "looks" like I need a crutch to win. When in reality, I don't NEED it to win, but it is legal and may help me focus. May help me from being distracted.

I tried the headphones an entire match against my friend, The Plumber, two Saturdays ago. I thought I would feel awkward (self conscious) but I was surprised I felt pretty comfortable overall. I liked listening to the music while I played. While I'm not sure it helped me focus more, it was relaxing.

He smiled and laughed at the beginning of the match, "what, you don't want me to bother you?" I no-responded and just laughed as I put the earbuds in my ears.

After the match I explained why I was using the headphones. He laughed from his belly and shook his head because he's well aware of how much The Talker talks.

I then confided I was a little self conscious about them. He is a good friend of mine and he shared back, "I think pool is fun. So I don't mind joking around. But if I'm gambling, don't talk to me."

In that moment, I was no longer self conscious. Pool is fun to me, yes, but I want to be serious when I play my straight pool matches; I want to win. I'm here to try to grab that first place spot to win the trophy.

(for the record, I have no idea what the trophy looks like. It could be as tall as my hand span for all I know, lmao).

I wore my headphones again in my very next match, that same day. My new opponent is a fun guy and enjoys the game SO much, even though he doesn't have a lot of "W's" by his name.

Every once in a while he would say something to me non-pool related and I would take one of my earbuds out and turn to him to listen. He'd then be kinda embarrassed and wave me off (because he realized he forgot I had headphones on), "Oh never mind, never mind. We'll talk after. Sorry."

I explained to him after the match why I had them on and he also shook his head and laughed and shared The Talker has upset him in the past, too.

I think it's actually quite ludicrous I'm "testing out" wearing headphones for one person. But in the same breath, it crossed my mind after those two matches that you know what? I kinda think I WANT to be known as the player everyone expects to be serious. I want to be known as the girl who wears headphones because she doesn't want to talk and rather focus on the match. (Or at least I'll look serious wearing the headphones, lol.)

I tried to wear my headphones for my last 3 matches, but after a while in each of the 3 matches, I wasn't really listening to the music anymore and so eventually I just took off my ipod.

And I admit, I missed being social and talking to my opponent when they might say funny things. I don't mean the distracting type of convo, but the fun, this-is-what-pool-is-also-about, type of fun, cool convo.

Heck, I don't know what I'll do next season! Wear my ipod every match. Don't wear it every match. Wear it only sometimes? Ugh. I dunno, lol.

hmmm....

End of Straight Pool Season - 5 Match Recap

2011-11-01T09:52:00.001-05:00

Well, I somehow managed to fit the rest of my straight pool matches in with hardly any time to do it!

I played my last 5 matches in 4 days.

I played two last Saturday and won one, lost the other. I came back in the first one, being down 87 to 58, I rallied to 81 points before losing 100 to 81.

In the next match, I dilly dallied for too long and let my opponent stay even with me til 65. I finally told myself I better shape up and pay attention or else I might lose to an opponent I normally beat. I ran 5, 12, 2 and 13 before finally winning. He would tell me the next weekend that I embarrassed him.

"How so?" I asked. "We were even til about 65 and we had a good match."

He confides as he laughs, "Because, we were tied at 65 and I never made another ball and lost 100 to 65!"

I laughed and said, "Well, just don't tell that part of the story and give the final score." lol

On Friday I played Turtle #2 and somehow managed a win 100-79. He has been playing so good, I was honestly surprised when I beat him.

I only got 3 hours of sleep Friday night and but still had a match scheduled for Saturday at 1pm and could not cancel or postpone b/c I only had one day left to play my other match. I was so exhausted and I played like it! But I reminded myself to push through as best I could and I won 100 to 78. That match took forever! And I played so badly. I finally ran 14 and 10 at the end to finish off the set.

And as typical fashion, I didn't get sleep AGAIN that night, lol. 4 hours of sleep and a tough match at 2pm on Sunday.

But I surprised myself! While a huge APA league was going on around us, I foul on the opening break and I start off -2! Then my opponent "Tape Measure" runs 17.

OMG, really??

How would I handle that? That's actually quite a bit of pressure. How would I return?

I get to the table and run 15! Holy crap! I was so impressed with myself for not faltering. And I was playing decent!

A few balls by both of us later, score is now 26 to 20 him. And then I run 20! EEeek! I then run 9 after he misses and I'm up 49 to 26.

I was so happy with my play. Not only was I making balls, I was playing smart - key ball to key ball and good break out shots. Watching all these videos is really really helping me.

He then runs 7 and I run 9.

I notice I am up by 30 and then only 20.

And then it happens.

I start to not play as smart; start to miss; start to lose the momentum.

I try to forge through it, but I'm also dealing with a guy who is sitting near us making comments. I lose my focus and am aware I am feeling pressure. I'm recalling the two matches were I was down by 30 and then came back to win.

He's down only 65 to 55 then ties it 70 70. The guy sitting near us says to me, "You let him catch up, huh?"

I really despise people trying to be funny during my matches. STHU.

I shoot back, "Really?? Just. Don't say anything okay? I'm in a match here."

I was already ticked at him and seriously considered earlier asking him to move because of the comments under his breath. And should have asked him to leave 20 balls ago.

But, I lost because Tape Measure never gave up and I started to miss more. I couldn't capitalize on his mistakes and wasn't playing as good. I lost 100-92. I never gave up, but I definitely gave the match away because I was thinking too much.

But, I still played GREAT at the beginning of the match! Put a little star by name for that, please :)

The cool thing is I have had high runs of 20, 18, 18, 14, 14, 15, and 13 for these last 5 matches. Sometimes I can run only 8 consistently in my matches. So, these new numbers really excite me! I can't wait to watch more videos and learn learn learn!

Rumors

2011-10-31T14:36:00.004-05:00

I played one of my final 3 straight pool matches of the season on Friday night. I wasn't sure how I would fair, but to ruin the suspense, I won 100-79 against a good player whom I consider very talented.

We were neck and neck for most of the match and then at 68-65 him, I caught a gear and ran 9, 2, 6, 6, and 12 to win 100 to 79. My high run for the match was 18 (which is pretty good for me!).

I wrote about my opponent before. I nicknamed him Turtle #1. Yes, he is a slow player but more so because he is deliberate and plays smart - so sometimes that means playing safes instead of risking shots.

As I mentioned in the two blog articles I wrote before, I don't mind him playing slow. It's just how he plays. I plan for a long match and I don't let it get to me. However, this is also the same person who another league member asked to play faster and take more chances. As I wrote before, a guy I nicknamed "The Talker" told me a few months ago that he was so annoyed with how slow Turtle #1 played, he told him to take more chances and speed up his game. I was pretty appalled when he told me this (still am, actually).

Anyway, on Friday night, Turtle #1 and I talked about our match after it was over.

He said said I played good and that I won because I didn't miss as many shots as he did. What I noticed was I missed earlier in the match and he missed later in the match. I told him I tried to figure out why I was missing in the beginning and once I figured that out, I guess I played better.

I also told him, "You know, I have to say that it was a real treat to watch you play tonight. I have been watching a lot of straight pool videos and at the beginning of our match, it was just like the videos! You used the key balls perfectly and also used correct paths to get on your breakout shots. It was a joy to witness."

He told me thank you and seemed surprised I would say that.

Then he shared, "I was told my slow play bothers you so I tried to speed up my decision process."

Wait, what?

I was stunned. I never meant for that to come out that way.

I told him the info was not at all accurate. "Actually, I don't mind that you play slow. And don't change your game for anyone! I know you are deliberate and that's okay with me. I have no problem with how you play and actually very much enjoy our matches."

He further explained that while he may play slow, he has figured out he doesn't need to spend so much time on certain decisions when only one choice is available.

I then expressed to him how appalled I was that The Talker asked him to speed up.

And Turtle #1 said, "What? He never told me anything like that."

And I was so confused!

Trying to squash a rumor is like trying to unring a bell. ~Shana Alexander

So, someone tells him his slow play bothers me (which is untrue) and then I hear that what The Talker told me was untrue, also.

Turtle #1 said The Talker never said any such thing. "He did act upset at the beginning of our match and was mumbling about excuses, but not one time did he asked me to change my game or speed up. If he said that, he's full of $hit." he said.

Rumors are an amazing thing! And in one ten minute period, two were proven wrong.

I appreciate Turtle #1 sharing with me he heard I thought he played too slow. Because then I was able to share with him that instead, I really appreciate our matches. I wouldn't have been able to compliment him on his game otherwise.

So, thank you to whoever told him that wrong info. lol.

Not All Videos Are the Same

2011-10-28T11:46:00.000-05:00

The other night I went to get my hair highlighted with my fav stylist and as expected, because I don't like to sit around and do nothing (otherwise, I feel like I'm wasting time) I brought something to do for the next two hours from the salon chair.

Normally I take a pool-related book or read one of their magazines, but this time since I have three straight pool matches scheduled for this upcoming weekend, I decided to watch some straight pool!

I grabbed my light blue laptop my, my headphones, and three DVDs from my stash and ran out the door (as usual, I was running late).

Getting my hair highlighted with my laptop and pool!

I put in a DVD I don't think I had watched before and because both Schmidt and Hohmann were in it, I was a little bit excited on what I was about to learn!

About 20-30 mins later, I couldn't stand it anymore. I wasn't learning a thing! I can't even give the excuse that the commentators were BSing. They just weren't talking about options, choices, the best shots, etc. They were more giving play by plays, instead of helpful advice.

So, I grabbed another DVD and hoped this one would be better. It was Allen Hopkins versus Jim Rempe and I hadn't seen this one either. And I was so excited when the commentator started talking - one of my favs! Grady Matthews. I just knew I'd learn from this video!

And sure enough, Grady and his cohort didn't let me down! I think his side kick was named Jack (sorry, I forget his last name).

I learned much much more from this DVD than the other bland one that had no advice or instruction at all.

It's amazing to me the difference between these two DVDs. And the key is obviously the commentators. Not just if they are knowledgeable, but what they say as the match goes on. Why certain balls are made instead of another one; what English is used for the break shot; which is the key ball; why to leave certain shots; how to manufacture a breakout ball.

Obviously, because I want to learn more about straight pool, the match with the "instructional" commentating was what I aimed for. If I wasn't trying to improve, I suppose the other match would have been fine to watch to see who would win.

But I am of the opinion that watching pool videos is about learning. I don't watch pool DVDs to just see the final score. It's not a movie to me - it's a learning experience!

Chalk Incident

2011-10-27T09:59:00.000-05:00

I am enjoying going to league on Mondays and sometimes Tuesdays with my boyfriend as all I do is be the cheerleader along with being the score keeper.

While I'm already a very observant person, I get to watch and notice even more than usual because I focus entirely on the matches, instead of also playing pool.

On Tuesday night, we went to a new bar. Two little bar tables were in one area and that's where the two teams fought it out.

My boyfriend is playing his 4th match of the night and safety after safety occurs. His opponent was able to kick in a ball and started to run out his last three balls.

And then he did something very weird. Almost disturbing, lol.

He was about to shoot the two ball into the side pocket and before he shot, he walked around the table slowly, and deliberately walked to where a piece of chalk was sitting on the table. He picked up the chalk and I thought he was going to move it out of his line of sight (which I have seen a million times from other players).

INSTEAD, he picked up the chalk and turned it UPSIDE DOWN on the table.

WTF?!

Really?

Now, you might be thinking to yourself maybe he is doing this b/c upside down chalk might annoy his opponent (which I ironically mentioned in another post that some people do deliberately as sharking techniques to distract their opponents).

But this guy had a connect-the-dots out. Three stop shots and he's out. My b/f was not going to be back at the table, so this "action" to turn the chalk upside down was done deliberately - for himself.

For some odd reason, he would rather ensure the chalk was upside down before he shot!

I then looked at the other two pieces of chalk on the table and sure enough they were both also upside down.

Wow. Lol.

Image courtesy Samm (Diep) Vidal

Using Pool for Marketing

2011-10-25T13:01:00.000-05:00

I saw this at work and just had to take a pic. LOVE that this company is using pool balls for their advertising. This is the cover of copy paper - "Bright White Premium Card Stock" paper to be exact.

Coolio. :)

Direction Needed, and Found!

2011-10-20T18:15:00.005-05:00

I am not a very visionary person. I have learned in my leadership classes at work that you either have that type of personality or you don't. I'm the don't.

I do like goals. Well, love goals actually, and they have been very helpful in my life. But I am not one to think of the future, wonder what if, or even contemplate the tough questions about life in general. Your purpose in life, sort of questions. Why am I here, sort of questions.

Then something changed all that.

Although I never thought that way for all my life, the last two months I have questioned my life. I have questioned my purpose.

I am an only child, am not married, do not have kids, and I just lost my Mom, the love of my life. Before my Mom got sick, many considered me the Ambassador of Pool in Texas. But I stopped being the photographer at independent events, stopped calling in brackets to AZBilliards.com, stopped promoting tournaments, and I retired after 9 years on the Board and as TD from the OB Cues Ladies Tour 3 years ago to take care of my Mom and that has been my life. I have no regrets as I love her very much.

But now that she is gone, what is important now in my life? And what do I have to keep me happy and interested and going?

I could now try to move up in my job, but I admit I love my current position and don't have aspirations to move up. And I'm okay with that - because I am SO happy and challenged. And not many people are truly happy in their jobs, so I savor every day on my way to work.

So, back to the question I never ask: what is my purpose?

I know I'm not the only person who has asked this question, but for me it's a very new and unexpected question.

I love to live life to the fullest. Ask anyone and they will tell you.

But what is my purpose now that my Mom has passed? I no longer have her to take care of - that was my purpose for the last 5 years.

Then an amazing thing happened.

I read on AZB a thread where people were asked to list their pool heroes and why. As I read the replies, I saw that two people mentioned me.

Me?

What?

I replied to them and told them thank you and added that I was speechless, because I was.

Then one of the guys sent me a message and shared further why I was his hero.

Here is what he said:

Hey Trigger,

Just wanted to say that I'm glad I made your day by including you in my "Pool Heroes" post.

It's the truth. You set the example for a lot of us players. You have a full time job, you play and practice constantly and you blog about it, so we can all learn from your journey. Heck, I never would have picked up a Capelle book, if it weren't for your blog. Now, I own three.

Whenever I'm down on my game and I don't feel like playing or practicing, I think, "Melinda would play, no matter what". So, I go play.

It's easy to pick a celebrity or pro as a hero (you kinda are a celebrity BTW ), but players like yourself are the true heroes of our game.

Thanks for all you do for us.

Take care,
-Jeremy from Florida

After reading his message, I know now I have a purpose. I know now that my life in pool was no accident. I now feel that although pool has made me into the confident woman you see today, I have affected others in their life because of all the things I have done in pool over the years.

Thank you, Jeremy, akaStandby Kid. It doesn't seem like it from this long post, but I really am speechless for your thoughtful, open words that allowed me to see myself in different, meaningful, purposeful way.

Thank you!!

Embarassing Reaction This Past Weekend

2011-10-19T18:00:00.001-05:00

As I wrote about just last week, sometimes we react badly after a match. It's not common for most of us, but sometimes there are rare times when something triggers us to react badly. Even for seasoned players, every once in a while something makes us act stupid, lol.

Which make us embarrassed.

And just this past weekend, this happened in the NFL!

Did you hear or see the footage of the two coaches' post game hand-shake that went awry? The Detroit Lions' head coach Jim Schwartz took offense at the over exuberance of Jim Harbaugh, whose San Francisco 49ers had handed the Lions their first loss of the season.

A fired-up Harbaugh shook Schwartz's hand, then gave him a hard back-slap, after which Schwartz sprinted after Harbaugh and jawed the coach.

Even a former NFL coach used the word "embarrassing:" Dan Reeves stated, "It's certainly something if you asked those guys now, they both I would hope be embarrassed by what happened."

Even Texas Tech coach said, "It's really embarrassing to see something like that happen in our sport."

This is the PERFECT example of what I was trying to say before. Sometimes after a match we do; something we regret; we react because of the moment; we do something "stupid" that we normally wouldn't do.

It's a reaction to the moment type-of-thing. A rare occurrence (that as I said in my previous blog post) that we should cut people (pro or amateur) some slack.

Ahhh.... real-life examples. Thank you, Coaches!

Here's the vid, in case you didn't see the "altercation."

Pressure Advice From Y.E. Yang

2011-10-18T22:06:00.000-05:00

I recently read an old article about professional golfer, Y.E.Yang, who took over Tiger Woods' lead at the 2009 PGA Championship to win it! He stopped Tiger's "14 for 14" record for when Tiger had the lead after 54 holes.

Yang was interviewed after he won the tournament and besides all the questions regarding Tiger (which I was miffed at - Yang won his first major but the interview was a lot about Tiger, which I thought was unfair to Yang), he was also asked about his mental game and how he handles pressure.

While I wrote a blog article a few months ago listing the tips I have learned over the years on how to handle pressure, I enjoyed Yang's comments so much about pressure, I wanted to share with you these Q and A's as excellent reminders:

"Your caddie said that you're the mentally toughest player he's ever seen. Where does that toughness come from?"

I don't think it's toughness, but I do try to block out everything peripheral and just concentrate on my strategy. Thus I become oblivious to any and all pressure, or least try to.

" Did you employ any special techniques to help offset Tiger's aura?"

I just forgot that I was dealing with Tiger altogether, probably until the 18th green, when I acknowledged that Tiger could make a miraculous comeback. I just played my game.

"You said that great names play with Tiger and "their competitive juices flow and they go head-to-head with him and try to win." Why is that the wrong approach?"

I can't say that is a wrong approach, but through experience, i understand aggressiveness can go a long way, but too much pressure and added expectations can become negative variables. I think sometimes the players add unnecessary pressure upon themselves.

These answers are common against successful professional athletes.

It reminds me of that famous quarterback who said, basically: "I think the reason I'm so successful is because I'm forgetful. As soon as the play is over, I've already forgot what happened, so I don't have any negative thoughts or over-confidence from what just happened to affect my next football pass."
..................

I wrote this blog entry about two weeks ago on a layover at JFK. But it was just a first draft and I am just now posting it after editing it some more. :-)

These two main themes above crossed my mind when I won the tourney last weekend: I tried to remind myself not to play the player and I also tried to forget mistakes as soon as they happened. I'm a firm believer in figuring out right away why I made a mistake, but then it's key to let the mistake go so you don't dwell on things such as "it should be 3-0, ME, not 1-2, THEM" or "I still can't believe I missed that 8 ball two games ago."). Focusing on past events prevents you from focusing on the present (i.e. on that shot in front of you).

While I tried to think about the above, I wasn't successful 100% of the time during the tourney, but I definitely thought about the two main themes a few times when I felt nervous. And then later when I was in the zone, all the above kinda happen on it's own, lol. But you can give yourself a better chance with nerves and pressure if you can incorporate the above at times in your arsenal during or before a tourney.

ACS State Singles Recap

2011-10-17T20:24:00.000-05:00

I went to the ACS (American CueSports) Texas State tourney the weekend of Oct 16th. I was surprised there were 43 ladies in the singles event!

Pleasantly surprised by the nice turn-out.

I drove down the night before with my b/f and we didn't try to get there early, instead we took our time and arrived about 10pm. We checked out the charts and then went to sleep at a decent hour, instead of staying at the convention center and being stupid like drinking and staying up too late for no real reason, lol. He had to play at 9am, I had a bye in my first round.

He won his first match and then I started my trek through the ladies bracket at 1030am. I won 4-0, even tho I started off slow. My opponent is from my area and an extremely knowledgeable player, but I prevailed. I then won my next match 4-1 against a newbie, but she was so kind and nice.

Next round was a 4pm and so my b/f and I went to see a movie because we had 4 hours til we played. Real Steel was a good flick. At 4pm I played another friend and I was ahead 1-0 but then lost focus and got too comfortable and was down 2-1 in a race to 4. I bared down and started to concentrate and won 4-2.

I had to wait a little bit to play my next match and my opponent is a very tough player, both physically and mentally to play, so I started to get a little nervous.

The first game we go back and forth and I work on a great out but miss a side pocket shot that I had to cheat for the 8 ball. She wins that game with a great shot to get out, but I admit the wind was a little out of my sails, and it was only the first game. :( I was so disappointed because I had the opportunity to go up 1-0 right off the bat and I had run out so well and smart, to only falter.

I had another chance the next game but made a mistake and couldn't get out. I played safe on her 8ball, but she jumped it SO beautifully and made it. ugh. I rallied to win 1 (maybe 2) more games but I just didn't play my best and she won 2-4.

I was very disappointed, but more so, I hate to admit: I was...well.... used to it. I have yearned for a Texas state title tournament for so so many years, that I almost have come to expect I will give away my matches. It was just typical of me. I let the mental game get to me and I played my opponent, not pool. I do it every state tournament. I freak myself out because I want the title too badly.

As I walked around to kill time, I actually wondered why I played this game. How many years am I going to play and still let the mental game win? How many years am I going to enter these state tournaments, look around and believe in my heart I can win, but still NOT capture that first place prize because I give away games, and/or get nervous of the invisible pressure of the title and/or my opponent?

I sat around, I swear, for like 3-4 hours til I had to play my 5th place match. I was tired, irritated, annoyed, you name it. The matches took so dang long! ugh. And it was like 11pm and I was exhausted sitting around doing nothing for so long. :(

As I recall the chart in my head, and looking down the line at my opponents, I know I can win my next two matches to get to the 3rd place match for a rematch with the girl who put me in the one-loss side. Her best friend was in the rocking chair, and she was just as tough to play. So, at that point, my mind knew I could at least play for 3rd place.

I was pretty satisfied with that, as last year I got 4th in the BCA state tourney, and the one before that I placed 5th. So, I figured I was making progress, lol.

Of course, this meant I was thinking ahead, lol, and hadn't even played the two matches to GET to 3rd, lol. Yea, we aren't suppose to do that at all!

But, I was still pretty confident I could win my next two matches.

Of course the match I'm waiting on goes hill hill, ugh. I grab my cue and hit a couple of racks to warm up. I hadn't hit a ball in like 4 hours.

I FINALLY get to play! And I win 4-0.

Then my next opponent just finishes her match, also, and she was excited we could play right away, too, lol (it really was a very long day).

We played and I won 4-0 again.

I then get to have my rematch and as I said, I had no expectations for this 3rd place match. I was happy to be there. I wasn't thinking ahead, nothing was in my brain about the title or anything. I was so complacent and happy with 3rd, nerves and pressure were no where to be found. Plus, I don't know if I can get past these last two girls anyway, so I was okay with 3rd.

But, a funny thing happened. I was in the zone. Majorly. So in the zone, that after she missed the first 8 ball, I won 4-0! I couldn't believe it, really, and then not quite aware what was really going on because it all happened so fast: I was all of a sudden in the finals.

I played really, really good in that 3rd place match.

Right before the finals I realized I had just earned myself a plaque! (love trophies and plaques because I hardly have any.) I got a 2nd place plaque! yay :)

I was content with that and SO happy. It hadn't really sunk in that I was playing in the finals of a title tournament that I had yearned for and wanted for SO many years. I was just happy I was where I was.

But then.... I was still in the zone. OMG. I won the first 3 games of the first set so beautifully. Wow....

There were only a handful of people there (as it was 2am) but I think even they were impressed. My b/f would tell me later he's never even seen me play that well before!

I finally started to make a few mistakes and she won 2 games but I wasn't upset or let it get to me that I let her back on the scoreboard because I had been playing well and didn't completely dog it like I can do so easily, and have done a million times before.

But then I got out nicely to win the first set 4-2!

She tried to flip right away, but I had to pee. lol. I was drinking Diet Coke to stay awake (from the caffeine) and couldn't hold it any longer.

I shouldn't have done that, tho, as it slowed me down in the next set. As I washed my hands, I tried to force my mind from realizing I *could* win this. I tried to just be happy I won the first set. No thinking ahead. No thinking I finally might get a title. I tried to keep that all from my brain, because otherwise I would just get nervous. :(

She won the flip and broke and ran out! I shot once in the next set and she ran out again.

She's all of a sudden up 0-2.

She was running out the 3rd game and as I sat there, I was still content. I was pretty happy she was winning on her own accord, and finally not because I was missing shots and giving it away like I have in the past.

She was playing good now and not giving me chances, which to be honest, she would have to do this day because I was SO in the zone and playing so good, it was the only way I truly believe I could have been beat.

I hate to sound so confident, but this it not an ego thing or me being cocky, it's just a fact I was THAT much in the zone and seeing every shot, break out, run, shape, perfectly.

Anyway, at 0-2 her in a race to 4, in the final set, she hooks herself on the 8 ball. She misses and I run out. I then break and run so beautiful, I actually impress myself! I was SO freaking amazed how well I could not only see the layouts and runs, but also how well I was executing my shots and shape! Score 2-2.

I think she scratches, and I run out so nicely again. I'm truly impressed, lol, with how well I am getting shape and seeing the outs (and not hooking myself with all her balls left on the table).

I look down at the score and I'm all of a sudden I'm up 3-2.... in a race to 4.

I don't think ahead and I just break the balls, make one on the break, and quickly and confidently grab my playing cue ready to check out the layout.

I like solids, but it still wont be a cake walk. I start pecking at my run and have to make a soft break out with 3 balls left. As I walk over to see if I left myself a decent shot, I see it: I'm about to win. It takes all I can not to cry.

It's not ever yet, I tell myself. Don't cry!

I play a stop shot on the 5 ball. Cut the one ball, and slide over for the 8ball which is intermixed with all her stripes on the table. It looks like the 8ball wont now go in the side but what everyone doesn't know is, *I* know it can be cut down the corner, as that's what I was planning all along anyway. I just came up short, but I can still see the 8 ball enough even though it was tucked behind her stripe. I call the corner, get down, remind myself not to jump up, take a few strokes and I nail it!!

I immediately fall to my knees, and start sobbing with my hands covering my face! OMG! I can't freaking believe it!!!

My b/f was cheering and he comes right up to me and I hug him, sobbing! The 3 other people left were clapping and I was a mess! I then walked over and apologized to my opponent for not shaking her hand right away and she said she understood as I mumbled I was crying because of my Mom.

Her and her best friend congratulated me and truly expressed how well I played. I was very moved they were so nice and cordial.

My team captain was one of the ones left at 230am and she came over and hugged me as I cried and cried! Then the TD came over, Janet, and I cried. And then I hugged our friend Ross, and I sobbed in his arms too.

When I was shown the plaque, I LOST it! OMG it was so pretty and huge and I won a freaking state title tourney!!!!!

I joked with my b/f a he took this pic, "make sure you get the crowd in the background." lol.

Can you see my red nose from crying?

I cried and cried. Even as I type this out, I am tearing up how moving it all was to me. To finally win something you been craving for years and years is so very emotional. And to add to that emotion that fact I can't call my Mom to tell her, just breaks my heart at the same time.

I wanted to text my besties, but they were all sleeping! :( But a few night owls were awake on FB and I was posting up a storm! LOL.

I know many people think I should have won this years go, or they had no doubts. The fact is, I dogged it every year, every time. To put pressure on yourself is a horrible feeling. To be nervous sucks. To give away games because you miss because you are thinking ahead, is brutal. I would get jitters literally weeks before Texas state tourneys, ugh, yearning for the win.

I can't explain to you why I wasn't nervous before this tourney. Maybe it's because this time I had no time to get the jitters? I have been so busy lately, I didn't have time to realize I had a state title tournament ahead of me. I had hardly any time to pack, much less consider the desired outcome of this tourney.

Today was just a day I wasn't thinking ahead. I wasn't nervous. I had no pressure for some reason.

That's why I won.

But I can't tell you WHY I didn't feel pressure or wasn't nervous toward the end of the tourney. I admit I did read all my underlined sentences from the book Winning Ugly by Brad Gilbert, but I have done that several times right before other tourneys.

Can I capture that again? Possibly. I have been in the zone a few times in the last ten years, so I know it's possible. But I also know how tough it is to not think ahead when you want something very badly.

Of course that night after he win, I could barely sleep. And then woke up early and was finally able to text my besties!

When I go to the convention center the next day to watch my b/f play in teams, a lot of people congratulated me. I shed so many tears from hugs and sharing how I collapsed on the ground after my win just the night before.

The next day, they gave me the chart!!

Then after my "official" pic with the plaque and ACS State President, I walked around with my plaque and more congratulations from friends and acquaintances. It meant so much!

At one point, I sat with some girlfriends during their team event, and as I sat there with the plaque in my lap, I stared down at it and started to cry. I was so dang happy and yet tore up inside because I couldn't share the amazing news with my Mom. Two months to the day of her passing, I won this tourney for her.

All weekend I would hug my b/f and look up into his eyes and say "Can you believe it??"

He'd reply, "Yes, I can."

I'd ask right away, "No, really, can you believe it??"

He'd stammer and say, "Uh, no."

I'd ask again and we went around like this all weekend. lmao!

And no, I still can't believe it!

Tourney description: OMG!

When Sharks Attack

2011-10-15T08:55:00.015-05:00

Gary Frerking is this month's Poolsynergy host and he wants us to talk about sharking.

Ahh... sharking.

I've learned more and more about sharking lately, mostly because a good player friend of mine has confided in some of the things he does to shark people. The reason the topic was brought up was because I told him I knew he was sharking in his matches, lol. I felt comfortable telling him that I wrote about him in a blog post. This is when I stated he took many bathroom breaks during the finals of a tournament and could get away with it because this tourney didn't have a rule about the # of bathrooms breaks per match (like a tour would have, for instance). So, he was able to get away with that sharking technique and sure enough rattled his opponent enough to win the tourney.

He recently told me if he notices his opponent is bothered by upside-down chalk, he will deliberately keep putting the chalk upside-down. This forces his opponent to get his mind off of the game.

Quite insightful yet disturbing to me.

I hate to hear when the pros are accused of doing things deliberately when in fact, we really don't know. Because they interrupt a shot to ask a question - how does one sit in their chair and say to themselves, "okay, run, get up and interrupt him "NOW." No, I feel that we sometimes just react to things and don't deliberately try to shark people.

But, that is my optimistic side coming out in me.

However, I have seen true sharking before. And it's not pretty.

Standing by the table while you shoot, talking loudly while you are shooting, etc.

What I also don't like is that some people think that certain players deliberately complain and/or get mad at themselves to shark their opponents.

What?

The people I know that show emotion do not do it deliberately. They are simply wearing their emotions on their sleeves. Now granted, their actions DO shark their opponents. But, from where I'm sitting, I know in my heart they aren't getting mad at themselves deliberately to throw off their opponents. They just don't handle tough emotions calmly all the time.

The funny thing about the pros: they all know who the sharkers are. They know when they see certain opponents' names on the charts they will have to deal with antics. Luckily, the pros are pretty good at focusing on their game against sharkers because they have years of experience dealing with them, lol.

What about me? Have I been sharked. Sure.

I have also sharked myself by letting people get to me. Ugh. Hate that.

No, really, what about me?

Have I ever sharked anyone?

Yep, I have.

I am ashamed to admit it, but luckily this was years and years ago. I immediately felt bad and prolly have yet to recover, quite honestly.

But here is my story:

I know from reading about mental toughness that when you are in the zone, the worst thing you can do is to start thinking about how well you are shooting. That throws your game off. Instead of free stroking, you are now thinking about outcomes and how well you are shooting and it affects your game tremendously. You think-yourself out of the zone!

Think about it - how can you be thinking about how well you are shooting, if your mind is suppose to be focusing on the shot at hand?

I was playing a friend of mine (about 8-9 years ago) who told me during our match, "please quit talking to me while we play." I was hurt, but at the same time felt bad for bothering her. I was just being friendly to her while we played, ugh. But, I completely understood she wanted to focus on the game and that I was distracting her.

But I also realized I had ammunition. (gosh I hate thinking this way!)

But I did: Future reference material.

Sure enough, I was playing her a couple of months later for 7th or 9th place on Sunday on the Ladies Tour in Texas. She was free stroking and playing great! She was running out from everywhere. And then I did the wrong thing; the inappropriate thing: I spoke to her. :(

I told her, "I wish your music was playing on the jukebox, I like your music best. And btw, you are shooting really good."

What did that do? It got her out of her rhythm. It got her thinking about (probably) several things:

Why is she talking to me?
I DO love my music and wish it was on.
Why did she bring that up?
Wait, I AM playing good.

And yes, it sharked her. She started to miss, I started to capitalize, and she even had to take a bathroom break because she was so upset that I distracted her (I'm guessing).

I ended up winning that match and went on to place 4th I believe.

Still to this day, I am ashamed at myself for doing that. For me to even type these words out is difficult for me, but the topic is about sharking and I must confess I have done it before. And I honestly don't know how the people who do it continually and deliberately can live with themselves.

(BTW, I also recognize when other players do this to me. I have noted people trying to throw me off my game deliberately by the same "complimenting" comments. I *try* to force the nice comments from my brain.)

Sure, pool is mental like golf. Sure, no rules say I can't talk. But this is about ethics.

I could even throw the word "karma" around in this blog article (but I wont).

It's a much better feeling to know I am winning because of skill and talents, instead of sharking and "trickery."

Btw, STILL not happy I did that, even if it was 8-9 years ago. :(

ACS State

2011-10-13T17:42:00.000-05:00

Heading down to the center of the state of Texas tonight. ACS State is this weekend and singles starts tomorrow morning.

Being that ACS (American CueSports) was divided from the BCAPL some years ago and is a much, much smaller entity, I figured the # of entrants would be smaller than the BCA State tourney.

Boy, was I wrong! They have like 42 players already signed up!

I think at the BCA State there were like 25 players. They had a separate division, tho, but even if combining those two women's divisions, I'm not sure that would be 42 payers. Well, just maybe.

Either way, what I thought would be a short day and simple tourney with not many players has turned out to be a tough event!

What was I thinking it would be an "easy" tourney to play in?? I need to prepare myself on the way down there tonight for the competition!

Dang title tourney jitters...

Video Tour of Billiardino in Zurich, Switzerland!

2011-10-13T11:55:00.000-05:00

I went to Zurich, Switzerland for about 5 days last week. While I was there, I visited one of their pool rooms and I was able to do another video tour for ya! This pool room only has 47 tables. Ha! Forty Seven!

Please let me introduce you to: Billiardino!

Etiquitte Versus Ethical

2011-10-12T16:11:00.000-05:00

A couple of Friday night's ago I went to a casino in Shreveport with some girlfriends. When they went to bed, I ventured to the poker room where I feel most comfortable in a casino nowadays. I must admit that's a great feeling - comfortableness.

While this casino is 5 hours away from the regular casino I venture to, it meant I didn't know any of the dealers or players, but that was okay. I still felt comfortable playing poker.

As time goes on toward midnight, the now-drunk kids who have only played poker online show up to try their hands at "live" poker. The-behind-the-computer-screen-players tried their best and got more and more comfortable as the night went on, but they still weren't aware of all the poker etiquette that is common when playing in person, and the dealers and seasoned players would help them out when they would fold or bet out of turn, not know when to put their blinds up, etc.

My chip stack was higher than when I started but admittedly I wanted a piece of the drunk and newbie action, so instead of being patient, I started to get in more hands I shouldn't of. Boo-Hiss.

Then I get in what would be my final hand and I am chasing cards and I bluff on the river and go all in. Three others fold, and the new guy to the left was about to fold but his friend whispers to him, "she's bluffing, call her."

He calls. I get caught. I lose about $120.

I am LIVID! I start telling them they can't do that, it's not right, as I point my finger towards them as I get up from my chair and raising my voice. The dealer tells them "one player per hand," but I still go off on them some more. They are drunk and deny anything was said and I take my bruised ego (cause I got caught), ticked off brain (cause I'm mad), and now-depleted money stack and I leave.

I tell the supervisor as I walk by him, "you may wanna watch those guys" with a very obvious pissed-off tone in my voice.

And as I'm cashing out they want more explanation, and I provide the details.

While this may not seem all that bad because they didn't know the rules, it's still unethical. And even though they didn't know it, they were in a sense cheating.

Standing in some one's golf line to putt causing a shadow is about etiquette.
Taking too many bath breaks during your pool match is about etiquette.
Folding out of turn in poker is about etiquette.
Talking while a friend is about to drive a golf ball is about etiquette.
Putting the chalk deliberately upside down to annoy your opponent is about etiquette.
Throwing your cards too far at the dealer or not placing your bets far enough for the dealer to reach at the poker table is about etiquette.

Kicking your golf ball from behind the tree is unethical.
Not fessing up you fouled in a match when you know you did and are being asked about it is unethical.
Showing your poker cards to friends while they are still in the hand is unethical.
Knowingly writing down the incorrect number of strokes one tee 9 is unethical.
Deliberately moving your coin two spots when you win a game in a pool match is unethical.
Telling someone to fold or not is unethical.

There is a huge difference. And I will never forget this night of bad ethics from those guys.

I heard the next day the dealer got onto the two guys. The dealer also shared that a couple of hours later, they confessed they had been talking to each other about the pots while in the hands. Ugh!

Embarrassing Reactions to Embarassment

2011-10-08T07:06:00.000-05:00

I've noticed over the years in myself, and in others, what the embarrassment factor does to a player. Even though I have experienced this horrible feeling, I have seen some of the best pros react with rage over embarrassment, also.

Fans b1tch and complain and make fun up the pros who may post on facebook and "whine." Or they will see a pro react at the end of a match with unusual, rude characteristics and the "fans" will run to the internet and tell everyone who will listen: "
I can't believe he did that!"

I don't like fans complaining about their idols. I really dislike it when they say "that's why pool is going nowhere" just because a pro whines or complains after a match.

I have felt what the pros have felt. And I bet you have, too.

You remember those few times that you instantly react to a comment or nonverbal cue after you lose a close match. As you reflect back, think of those times you snapped at someone after you lost a close match or started to whine to friends after a tough loss.

The key to these unusual, and unfortunate circumstances, are they usually occur after a very tough loss COMBINED with some other factor. If you simply lose and walk away without seeing or hearing anything, you normally don't say anything. But if someone makes a comment you are not prepared to receive and maybe also combined with the fact a lot people were just watching your loss, the feeling you feel in your body is like none other.

It's difficult to describe, but it's the feeling if embarrassment running through those veins and it makes your heart race and your blood boil.
When you lose to another player who outplayed you, or you simply didn't perform well, those loses you take in stride and don't overreact.

But the loses where you make a mistake at the very end of a match and you feel embarrassed over it, or at the end of the match something happens that triggers a raw emotion of embarrassment, those are the times you overreact and respond like a raging idiot. Those are the few times in your career that you snap at people or whine about the conditions, when in reality, you are just upset with yourself for losing.

I remember one tourney I was playing for 4th and I played my little heart out! I was ahead most of the match and my opponent came back and won. So many people were watching and after the hill hill match, a friend went up to my opponent and told her right in front of me how well she played. I was upset instantly because I had played my little heart out and gave the match away at the end and her words stung. Stung so badly, I'm telling you all about it and it was prolly 4-5 years ago.

Funny. We never whine after we win. Do we?

We never snap at someone who makes a crappy, unwelcomed, wrong-timing comment after we win.

But I feel for the soul who makes the wrong comment after a tough loss! We may bite their heads off and spit them to the ground!

This is why I don't complain about pros or friends who snap or overreact after a loss. And it's only because of some little thing that causes the feeling of embarrassment to rise through our bodies all of a sudden.

I have felt this way and overreacted plenty of times.

Another example...

I lost 7-5 just two weeks ago in a match because I slow-rolled an 8 ball. I shared out loud, "the ball rolled off!" I was embarrassed but also ticked. I was about to make it hill hill and instead I lost. Right after the match, I tell a friend, "it really did roll off" and as she agreed, a guy came up to just say hi and thought he would be funny and added, "I thought you just played bad."

WTF? Yea, I snapped at him. I was rude and I was pissed.

Think for a minute though - if I had won, I would have laughed WITH him.

Instead, I complain to others what he said to me and how rude I thought it was.

Let's be fair here. I knew he was joking, I knew he didn't mean it, but I reacted badly. And it was an instanct reaction. It's a very horrible feeling to do this (embarrassment) and I bet I'm not the only one who hates to overreact to comments no one means to say that rile us up because of their timing.

Another time a friend of mine was playing on the stream table and lost a really close match that she should have won. She sits behind the computer right after her loss and someone in the chat room states that she played bad and gave the match away. She literally had just finished the match and was embarrassed she lost on the stream and she didn't dare hold in her immediate reaction to that comment! She was hurt and extremely upset at what they said and she went off on them.

I recall one pro whined on facebook after a tough loss in the finals of a big tournament. Everyone complained and talked about how he was a sore loser. He said the racks were bad and his opponent should never be allowed to soft break.

He was mad he lost and so he complained right afterwards. Do you think he would have whined if he had beat the guy? No. He might have said something in the interview nonchalantly about the soft break, but he wouldn't have spewed off on facebook.

Embarrassment causes an immediate reaction in people. The reaction it causes can sometimes not be controlled. You are upset, embarrassed, and mad and one small, little comment can set you off in a heart beat!

This is very normal. So to all those people that think the pros should not whine or complain, they are human, too. They sometimes can't control their reactions either.

Ask them about their loss in 24 hours or even 12 hours, and their response would be completely different. That's why it's best to just not say anything to someone after a loss until they bring it up.

Each of us already have our own snowball effects going on. After a tough loss, say something funny, crappy, or comment how bad we played and you may get an earful from the red-headed demon inside us.

Sometimes we may be able to control it, but sometimes that little $hit comes out with no warning because we can't control the reaction fast enough.

Sorry in advance btw... I have been known to be that red headed demon child.

It's so very ironic to me that an embarrassing instance causes us to react without thinking, and that in itself if usually very embarrassing!

That's why all of this makes sense when one searches for the definition of "Embarassment:"

Embarrassment is an emotional state of intense discomfort with oneself, experienced upon having a socially unacceptable act or condition witnessed by or revealed to others. Usually some amount of loss of honour or dignity is involved, but how much and the type depends on the embarrassing situation. It is similar to shame, except that shame may be experienced for an act known only to oneself.

Video: My Cue Collection

2011-10-05T17:44:00.000-05:00

Poolstudents.net is looking for cue collections! The trick is, Poolstudents.net wants the cue collections via video.

Well, here is my simple little video, where I discuss my 4 custom-designed cues: CLICK HERE to watch the video.

If you have a cue collection to share, please let us know! We'd love to put up more cue collection videos.

Pissed Off and Spoke Up

2011-10-04T12:18:00.006-05:00

As I mentioned in my previous post, I am short on time to play my final 7 straight pool matches by the end of Oct because of all my travels this month. It literally have 5 days at the end of the month to play 7 straight pool matches.

So when I got back early from a weekend jaunt this past weekend, I decided to try to fit in 2-3 straight pool matches on Sunday. Although I was EXTREMELY exhausted, I HAD to try and fit in a few matches or else I would be way to stressed out come the end of Oct.

Risk versus Reward.

Tired and not playing matches Versus risk losing matches because I'm tired. Ugh.

The first match Sunday afternoon I started off badly. So badly, I almost quit the season right there.

Yep, seriously.

I was upset at non-pool things, and extremely tired. I was losing and playing bad, and I was already worried about if I could fit the rest of my matches in this season.

If I was to lose this match, then why play the second match that day? (which was a tougher match.) Further, I wasn't even sure if I could play all 5 of my other matches anyway. That would mean really horrible stats for me this season. :(

But, I finally got some kind of fire in me and after being down16-28 in almost 25 innings, I ran 7 then 13 then 12, etc, and secured my win 100-56.

I'm glad I pulled through the funk at the start of the match!

My next match Sunday afternoon was against The Talker. Match #2.

As you may recall, I wrote about him before. He asked a slow player to take more risks to speed up their match. The Talker was agitated over the slow player's slow play.

I was already apprehensive about playing The Talker. He's tough to fade. Yep. Because he talks too much.

Even before we played he said, "We are tied in wins so this will be the tie breaker."

Huh?

Why say that to me?

Why say anything at all like that?

As we start to play, I'm playing good! I am up 22 to 5.

:)

Yay me!

Then instead of a safe, I go for a bank. Normally I would play safe, but I already know he hates slow games and he already made a comment about how slow our match started off.

I missed the bank and that gave him a shot and then he ran 13.

Boy was I mad at myself!!

After all these years I haven't learned to play my game? I let his comments get to me? Was it because I was ahead I took that risk? If it was close, I don't care what his words would have been.

So I was really upset at myself.

This gives him new blood. I even overhear him tell his wife, "and I was about to give up."

Ugh!

He gets close in score and shares with me, "Ooooh, almost even."

I made another mistake and he again capitalized. He gets ahead of me 31 to 36 and says, "Oh, now I'm ahead."

Why say that?

Seriously?

Do I point out when I'm kicking his a$$?

Seriously.

Why does he think his comments are okay?

He talks every single shot. To himself. To anyone that can hear him. He will tell himself, "What was I thinking?"

Or, he will sit in his chair and talk to his wife. Too bad he doesn't talk softly. His voice carries. Loudly.

Or he will make a comment after I miss.

I missed a shot because I'm rattled and he tells me as he walks to the table, "Wow, you really do like me."

Seriously??

WTF was that?

I finally can't stand it anymore and snap back to him, "Just stop talking. Seriously. You don't have to say anything at all."

His response: laughter. He laughs all the time. And he just has a great time playing pool. Talking, laughing, talking, laughing.

At this point I'm down about 42 to 58.

I'm still upset with myself, still getting more perturbed at him. Upset in general.

Then he misses a great break out and shouts at the balls as he looks at the table, "Get bad! Don't leave her a shot!"

I go to the table, stunned. I am SO livid. I have no shot (of course). Even tho he just broke out all the balls, I have no shot.

He's giggling in his chair and saying something out loud to the sweaters and I mumble, "Well, you got your wish."

I was so mad, I bet I was spitting.

He says, "what?" All happily and smiling toward me.

I reply, "I asked you to be quiet and yet you still continue to talk."

He apologizes and by now I am just stunned.

Not only am I losing to a guy who I am allowing to shark me, I am now upset because I've confronted him.

Sure, it wasn't a fist fight or yelling, but this non-confrontational girl is now upset because I had to tell someone to basically shut up (again!).

Why say anything at all when playing in a match? Why tell me why you missed or that my miss was unexpected?

Why "thank" me for missing. I'm already down in the match. Is that necessary? Is it necessary to say anything? Anything at all?

Sure. I let his words bother me.

I fully admit it.

But I find it pretty freaking ironic The Talker asked the slow player to change his game because it was annoying to him, yet he talks and talks and talks and his etiquette is out the window. He has no respect. Zero.

Sure, he's just an extrovert and he handles misses with laughter and thinks pool is just "fun."

But etiquette goes a long way.

And I want to focus on pool - NOT his inappropriate words.

Yes, he definitely rattled my cage.

Normally things that are my fault I will just fess up, But I am FED up with his excessive talking while either he's at the table or I am. It's uncalled for.

And yes, I'm still pissed!

I wonder if he is aware he is sharking people? I wonder if he knows he gets under their skin?

I really, really wonder....

BTW, I tried as hard as I could to come back in the match and beat him! I could tell he felt bad after I asked him AGAIN to stop talking. He knew I was upset and he missed more. He won only 100-83 and he's LUCKY toward the end of the match that I missed 3 balls, had 2 scratches and 2 miscues or else I would have won. Dammit.

I want to state one more thing: these learning experiences are extremely frustrating!!! :-( :-(

Photo: Raffle Ticket Stamp

2011-10-03T13:59:00.000-05:00

One of the more cooler and clever things I've seen!

One of the Ladies OB Cues Tour regulars often supports the tour by buying lots of raffle tickets.

His last name is very long. So, instead of having to write his long name and phone number over 100 times on raffle tickets, per 6-8 events a year, he had a stamp made!

He now stamps the info on each raffle ticket!

He bought this stamp for this sole purpose several years ago. I caught him in action at the last tour stop and wanted to share his cleverness!

(click on images to enlarge)

League Yikes

2011-10-01T12:15:00.000-05:00

As many of you know, my Mom passed away in mid August. I therefore haven't felt like playing in my straight pool league so I haven't played any matches in a month and a half. I figured I wasn't mentally prepared to compete. So, why play before I was ready?

I emailed the league director to see how much time we have left this season, because I couldn't remember if it was the end of Oct or into Nov. I explained my Mom had passed and I had a lot of trips coming up in October. He replied, "Hi Melinda, League is over the end of October. Good luck."

Wow.

That's it.

I was pretty taken aback.

No help, no sympathy, no extension, no nothing.

So as I looked at my calendar, with all the trips in October, I only have the last full week of October to play 7 matches.

OMG... Really??

To top it off,Tue, Wed and Thu evenings are taken up with other leagues, so I would only have 5 days to play 7 matches.

Luckily, I played a match two Fridays ago (won 100-74), but how in the world would I get 7 matches in in 5 days? And at the same time be effective and not too tired to play so many in a short time period?

Let's face it, straight pool matches can last 2-3 hours. That's a lot of focus in 5 days!

I am more miffed tho that he didn't give a reprieve of some sort. He gave me his sympathies in person a few weeks back, but via email about the league he offered no help or even an offer to see if we could work something out. I don't need any excuses for not playing, but the reason is justified.

Oh well, I'll just see what I can do. I admit I almost felt like quitting. I wont be able to finish the season off well or maybe get all my matches in any way. But... I will still try. Even without help. :(

Breaking at the Texas Open

2011-09-29T08:33:00.001-05:00

I took some video footage of different breaks by some of the players at the Texas Open.

(As a reminder, the Texas Open was held Labor Weekend at Skinny Bobs in Round Rock, Texas.)

While road buddy Amanda and I were watching matches, we noticed Chip Compton using a mild break and so we wanted to capture it on video. While I did this, I was able to also capture CJ Wiley breaking against Brian Anderson. We also almost captured Charlie Bryant breaking, but the camera was blocked. Boo!

Anyway, check this out if you have a minute and a half.

Winning Breeds Confidence

2011-09-28T10:08:00.001-05:00

I am sure you've heard this quote before: "Winning Breeds Confidence and Confidence Breeds Winning." This quote is from Hubert Green.

Hubert Who? Who the heck is that?

Well, he's a professional golf player who has won many, many golf championships and tournaments.

The reason this quotes resonates so much with me is because I am going through a little issue right now.

On Friday nights, I play in a weekly 9-ball tournament that is handicapped.

(BTW, I don't know how they came up with the handicapped #s, but the numbers aren't anywhere near the APA handicapped #s. We would all be ranked higher in the APA.)

When I started to play in this Friday night tourney, I was rated a 5, but I couldn't get anywhere against the other 5s. These 5s are male players that place high in all types of tournaments all the time. Sure, there is one 7 and a couple of 6s, but there are a ton of 5s that I cannot beat on a regular basis that I have to play.... even.

I finally got verbally upset about it one night after losing again for millionth time to another 5, and going out in two or three.

I started to whine to the tourney director and he moved me down to a 4. I was relieved and thought I would have to bitch more, to be honest, lol, but he for some reason gave in pretty easy. Maybe he knew it wasn't a good handicap for me. I dunno.

The thing is, while many are of the opinion I should have stayed a 5 to better my game, I disagree right now. My confidence is shot. Instead of feeling the urge to get better and fight more competitively, every Friday night I felt kicked to the ground, wounded and bruised, and very upset and so freakin' frustrated... repeatedly.

Then I remembered way back when.... when a friend of mine named JoAnn "The Wiz" gave me great advice.

She shared with me in the mid 90s that I should play in "weak" tournaments.

Huh?

At the time, I was very frustrated with going two and out in big women's tournaments. Obviously, this was when I first started to compete in pool, so I wasn't as seasoned as I am now.

She told me I needed to build my confidence. And her advice was spot-on. Play in tournaments that I have a chance to be successful in. She went on to say not everyone can just throw themselves in tough tournaments all the time and expect to do well right away. Not-as-experienced-players needed to gain some confidence somehow, too. A confidence booster. It's tough to want to keep competing if you keep getting kicked down over and over.

And what helps more than gaining experience at winning, than WINNING.

Yes, it sounds kind of like a wild concept, but I believed in it (for me). And even now. I need confidence boosters. I need wins. The wins help me be confident, and the confidence helps me win.

Just like when I show up at little ladies events in my area and look across the room and I know I am the best female player there....I immediately gain some confidence. And then when I win, it helps me for my next tourney; the tougher tourneys.

Winning isn't easy. Winning takes just as much practice as practicing pool.

Sure, I could have kept playing as a 5, but I wouldn't have placed well OR it would take me much, much longer to finally place well.

And guess what is happening right now? Yep, I'm getting in the money in that Friday night handicapped tournament. And yep, I'm gaining more confidence. I would like to earn that 5, not just be thrown into a 5. I like hearing the threats, "We're gonna move you up to a 5." It makes me feel so good!!

What?

What is that feeling?

Yep, that feeling is confidence.

I am earning the confidence which is leading to winning, and winning matches on Friday night is giving me more confidence.

JoAnn "The Wiz" was correct and so was Hubert Green!

Now... you might be thinking these things about me:

Aren't you already a seasoned player?
Why would you need any more wins to build your confidence?
Shouldn't you already be a 5 anyway in that tournament based on your pool career?

Well, to be honest, I'm not as good in pool as I used to be. I was a Master player once. Once. That was many years ago. I have never won an OB Cues Ladies Tour stop. I took off from focusing on my pool game the past year.

And to be fair, I never competed against guys regularly until this year.

What I notice is of course this new avenue of experience playing against guys is helping my game, helping me. But, I also haven't practiced in over a year. Seriously.

So, a combination of a lot of things has rolled into one big large yarn of pool mesh, lol.

And that my friends is why I AM a 4 right now and feel I NEED to be a 4 right now.

Trust me, I can't wait for the day I can compete with the 5s on a regular basis and I pray that that day will come. I hope I haven't lost my ability. But until I work on my game, this is the price you pay: acceptance of where your game is.

So, do what you can to build your confidence! Remember: "Winning Breeds Confidence and Confidence Breeds Winning."

Example of Sportsmanship!

2011-09-24T14:25:00.001-05:00

What an incredible act of sportsmanship!

Read the story here or watch a video story about this amazing runner who helped another runner, during a race!

Video Blog - Awesome Case!

2011-09-23T08:24:00.003-05:00

Talk about Personal touches!

Check out this awesome case by fellow pool player (and artist), Rachel Hurst!

,

Important Story About a Certain Word

2011-09-22T12:11:00.000-05:00

One of my fellow bloggers wrote about an important word that is often used that really shouldn't be. I can totally relate because when I grew up in San Antonio, I lived next door and across the street from two handicapped kids. Chucky had down syndrome and Terry had an extreme case of cerebral palsy.

Take a minute and read this blog for me. You wont regret it:

http://poolstudents.net/wordpress/2011/09/a-word-i-wish-i-didnt-hear-so-much-in-the-pool-room/

Mars and Venus

2011-09-21T15:07:00.000-05:00

I know I've written about this before, but after this weekend, I need to write about it again.

A friend visited Rusty's Billiards Saturday night to check out how the local girls were doing in the OB Cues Ladies Tour Stop. He was shocked when he checked out the brackets sitting on the tournament table, where he noticed that I was already out and also one of my friends who is an even better player than I.

He walks up to me and says, "WOW, you didn't do very well. And Your Friend did worse! What is going on?"

Why say something to me? Why point out the freakin' obvious? Does it make him feel good to point out how badly we did? Does he REALLY think we want to hear that? Why say anything at all?

Seriously.

I don't get it.

It reminded me of the Texas Open. During one of my matches someone pointed out that I gave some games away.

Duh! Yea, I KNOW already.

And, Yes, he was a guy who shared that unfortunate tidbit with me.

I would never say that to a girlfriend. ESPECIALLY during a match. During a match we need positive affirmation, not reminders how badly we are doing.

Males and Females really are different. On Friday night I was at my regular hangout (Volcanoes - a pool room and sports bar) and one of the poker players/pool players told us his friend had told him he had gained a lot of weight recently.

I was like, "Whoa!"

I couldn't believe his friend came right out and said that to him.

I shared with the pp/pp that girlfriends could never do that. You'll never, ever hear a female tell their girlfriend, "Damn, you've gained weight!"

It's almost forbidden. Kinda blasphemy, lol.

Yet, guys can tell each other, "You've gained a lot of weight." Or, "Damn you shot bad that match."

Even I am fully aware of the male versus female "gender-talk." That same Friday night another friend told me how well he had played in his scotch doubles match, but right afterwards not in his singles match . Since he was a guy, I knew he could take my comment: "Actually, it looked like you were struggling in the scotch doubles match, too."

Granted, I still chose my words like a female, but I bet a guy would have been more blunt. And I probably wouldn't have said anything to counter my friend if he was female.

Mars men need to remember the Venus women. Please don't tell us how bad we suck. We have thin skins and soft egos, and you may hurt our fragile little hearts.

I have even told that guy (who came to the pool room Saturday night) in the past not to say things like that, but he just doesn't get it (or doesn't remember when he's trying to make conversation). He just says what he wants, no matter what. Hasn't anyone heard of Myers Briggs?

As a reminder, wait for our cue to say constructive criticism. Or, how about don't say anything at all. We already know when we gave the match away or played bad. Don't rub it in, okay? :)

And to all the males out there who respect that females can't always handle harsh words, thank you for being quite at the proper times or carefully wording your advice/comments! We appreciate you!

HandSkake #2

2011-09-20T12:47:00.001-05:00

I received quite a few comments to my previous post, Handshake.

Many were also upset at the lack of respect a non-handshake represents from Poor Sports.

Then PoolMinnow comes along and brings out an important point. I LOVE different perspectives!

Here is what PM said:

I have a slightly different point of view. If my opponent, in the moment of losing doesn't feel like shaking hands that's fine by me. As the person who came out the winner I try to have compassion for the other person who may have given it their all, may be very tired, hungry, etc. I won, and if they played in a gracious, fair manner during the match, that's how i judge their sportsmanship.

I think its almost more important to be a "good winner" and for me that means giving space to the loser, because its a much harder position to be in.

I've heard plenty of people go off complaining that their opponent didn't shake hands afterwards, or that they shook hands, but didn't look them in the eye, or their handshake was flabby. (Where do you draw the line). I just cringe, because that kind of complaining, to me, is poor sportsmanship at its worst.

If shaking hands when you lose is important to you, its a nice gesture. And I think, as the loser, it does something for YOU, more than the opponent. Some people are excellent and gracious losers and they should be commended. But, to me, its a slippery slope, as the winner to judge someone who doesn't.

PoolMinnow (PM) does indeed make some very good points. Just last weekend someone told me that after our match at the Texas Open they didn't hug me, they let ME lead the "ending" of the match. I shook her hand and briskly walked away because I was so defeated with my play. She said she would normally hug me, but knew I had a tough match and just let me be.

She even shared that she dislikes hugs from friends if she herself has had a bad match, so to reiterate: she took my cue and just shook hands.

I agree with PM that sometimes the bigger person is the winner who doesn't get upset at the Poor Sport (PS) who wont shake hands. However, I wasn't talking about the every-once-in-a-while PS's. I was more so talking about the PS's who make it a habit of being rude to their fellow players. And yes, I was also talking about the pro's who are a representative of the sport.

I agree wholeheartedly that the winner's can be a GREAT representation of the sport, also, by how we react to the non-hand-shake(s). And that is a true character and reflection of ourselves in the heat of the battle.

I can so relate to the numerous times an opponent has played so badly they walk off in shame or walk off without shaking hands because they are so embarrassed. I was not talking about them, though. I was talking about the recurring Poor Sports. The guys who are regularly two-faced when it comes to treating you with respect --> i.e, only treating you with respect if THEY win.

I love PM's comments. I do so agree that our reaction to the PS is ALSO a reflection of the sport! Thank you so much for your point of you, PM! It was a great reminder because I did indeed forget about this important part of non-handshaking while I went on my diatribe. lol.

And I also agree with the comment from one of my friends who said, "I remember every non shake I've ever been the recipient of...every time!"

HandShake

2011-09-19T12:44:00.003-05:00

It always amazes me when opponents don't shake hands at the end of a match. Most of the time, no matter what happens during the course of a match, the opponents will shake hands. Whether one is unbearably embarrassed by their play, or pissed off at themselves for playing so badly, that person will still do the proper, polite thing and still shake hands.

However, it's the Poor Sport who doesn't always shake hands. The Poor Sport played bad and is now pissed at themselves and they are so upset, they don't want to shake hands with you. Probably because even though it was through their own bad play they lost, they incorrectly think their opponent got rolls or didn't deserve the win.

In reality, they are mad at themselves and yet they punish their opponents, the fans, the audience, and ultimately themselves by not acting professional.

Even Wikipedia says:

"Generally, it is considered inappropriate, if not outright insulting to reject a handshake without good reason."

What I don't get is, if the Poor Sport wins a match they shouldn't have, they will laugh and smile and shake your hand with no problem. If you beat the PS, God Forbid, then you are no longer treated with respect.

Good word: Respect.

It's disrespectful.

I honestly feel when people do this, it hurts our sport.

It's like a golf pro not shaking hands with who he's been paired up with the last 18 holes; or the losing team of a football game heading to the locker room instead of walking cross the field of shame to shake hands; or a tennis player not shaking hands at the end of a match; you get the idea.

It's disrespectful.

When the PS's do this, do they even realize what it does to their opponent? You are belittling your opponent. You are not giving them the respect they deserve for being your opponent.

And of course everyone talks about the PS when they do this. We sit on the sidelines and whisper, "Can you beleive they did that? How rude." Or, "There he goes again..."

This not only happens at weekly tournaments, it happens at big events, too. Just at the Texas Open one of the pros did this to her opponent. Many fans saw it, too. The PS walked away from the table without any acknowledgement.

The PS would have treated any opponent that way because she was upset she was outplayed (I'm guessing), but her opponent took it personal. It was uncalled for and disrespectful. And what kind of representation of the sport is a pro who walks off without shaking hands? In front of a large crowd no less?

Granted, we don't know what inner demons she was facing. Maybe she had an issue with the crowd, or something weird happened in her match. Who knows. However, even PS's need to act human to their fellow human beings and treat them with respect and offer a simple handshake!

I know we get angry at ourselves sometimes, or our opponents for whatever reason, but we (the non Poor Sport) would still shake hands with the Poor Sport EVERY TIME, even though if the reverse happened, they would just turn and walk away from the table briskly, rudely, and selfishly.

Video Tour of the Texas Open!

2011-09-17T13:43:00.000-05:00

Like I did with the Ultimate Ten Ball Championships, here is a video tour for you all - this time of the 2011 Texas State Open.

It's held in Round Rock, Texas at Skinny Bob's Billiards.

I state in the video The Texas Open has been an annual event for 36 years straight, but I was incorrect - it's been 38 years going strong!!

Enjoy.

Here are some peeps in the footage: CJ Wiley, Rob Saez, Chip Compton, David Henson, Sylver Ochoa, Charlie Bryant, Ming Ng, Joe Salazar, etc.

Sunday League Highlights

2011-09-16T11:11:00.004-05:00

Sunday at league last weekend was... interesting.

We played out of our home pool room this particular Sunday (we are in a traveling league), which is a cool place with a large dance floor, stage, pool room in the back, booths, tables, large bar area, and even an upstairs part with more pool tables and sitting tables.

We walk in and bright lights immediately warm our faces. As we walk by the crowd of people, we finally reach the back of the place where the pool tables are and we find out they are filming for some sort of music video. Cool!

So, if you see something similar to these pics some day, you'll know they were filmed in Grand Prairie, Texas!

On this league, we play 6 matches every Sunday. I suppose that's because it's on a weekend, during the afternoon. I wouldn't fathom 6 matches per person played on a weeknight otherwise.

I win my first three games and as I'm waiting to play my 4th game, one of the opponents (who is currently in a match with one of my teammates) tells me, "you are a master player, right?"

"Huh?"

Mister Red Shirt repeats his question because I really didn't hear him.

"You a master player?"

"Um, no, I wish," I reply kinda laughing.

Mister Red Shirt adds, "Well, you play good enough to be one."

"Thanks," I say sincerely.

At this point now I know the other team has their eye on me. I'm the new girl and can play.

I lose the next match and the other team claps real loud. I then play Mister Red Shirt and he plays good against me after I miss a weird shot, and he beats me and his team loves it by clapping loud again!

The last guy now has no chance and I run out against him. This time my team claps loudly. lol.

Then Mister Red Shirt has to play my boyfriend last.

He is again playing on the table next to where I'm sitting and says to me, "Your boyfriend is gonna kick my a$$ because I beat you, huh?"

"Probably," I reply laughing again.

Sure enough, my boyfriend beats Mister Red Shir.

As we shake hands with the team at the end of the afternoon (we won 24 games to 12), the first guy I played stops to tell me, "I just want you to know you shoot really, really well and I like your game."

"Well, thank you. I appreciate that. I like your game, too."

Turns out I was the only one on our team that gave him a loss. He beat all my other teammates!

League is always interesting, isn't it?

PoolSynergy - Practice

2011-09-15T08:51:00.039-05:00

John Biddle, Founding Father of PoolSynergy, wants us to share with you this month what has worked and what didn't work for us personally in regard to practice.

Ahh... practice.

The pivotal part of every one's game.

In order to get better, you must practice. You hear the pro's fibbing and tell you they practice 8 hours a day. Whatever. No they don't.

However, practice is important. Patrice not only gives you CONFIDENCE, which is crucial, but it also gives you CONSISTENCY, which is key.

What worked for me? Set reachable goals to practice pool.

Once I set a goal to practice, then I was actually able to accomplish PRACTICING. What was my goal specifically? Well, several years ago it was to hit balls by myself for 1-3 hours a week on a 9-foot table.

I did this for almost 2-3 years. And guess what - it was obvious. It's very obvious when I practice and make a goal to hit balls. You can see it in my high rankings on the OB Cues Ladies Tour and also my high finishes at big tournaments.

Guess what people? It really does help!

Now, what doesn't work for me: Drills. I'm not a drill person.

Everyone asks me, "How can you practice by yourself?" I retort back, "Hell, how can you do drills???"

The other way to practice is to read books or watch videos. I highly recommend that.

However, I must not forget to mention that the game of pool is like golf: it's 90% mental.

"But Wait," you are thinking. "How do you practice mental toughness?"

Easy.

Read books on the mental game.

AND...

Play in tournaments. As many as you can.

Don't just play in a few. Get yourself in the middle of tournaments and exercise your mind; your mental toughness. Learn from every match. What worked, what didn't, what can you work on, why did you falter or do well? Reflect, learn, and your mental game will get better.

It doesn't matter how many hours you put on the pool table to practice - that wont help you in a pressure situation. UNLESS - you've already somehow learned or read that a solid pre-shot routine helps you overcome jitters/pressure.

You don't know how to handle these type of things automatically when you come out of the womb: a rough crowd, rude comments, bad rolls, bad thoughts, negative emotions, etc., .

You need to learn, absorb knowledge from books or online; you need to toughen up your mental game by playing against others in many, many different types atmospheres (pro events, weekly tourneys, etc.).

Yes, practice on a pool table to improve your game, pre-shot routine, and consistency. But combine that practice with sharping your mental toughness skills, too, by jumping into competition.

That combination is the only thing that worked for me.

Good luck!

Streaming Screams

2011-09-09T15:43:00.002-05:00

Most people love to watch pool on streams. And when it's free, it's even better!

But do you know what goes on in the background of the decision making? And do you know of the myriad of complaints?

Being a former Tournament Director (TD) and a pool player with friends, I hear things. Yep, I do. lol.

First, who decides what match will be featured? Who gets to decide which players get to play on the stream table? Usually, it's the TDs. They look at the names, and admittedly, they pick the match-ups of the players that are most well-known. Usually, these are the top-ranked players of the tour at hand. If it's not a tour, then it's still the top players in that tournament.

The key is, what about the "little people"? What about the players who see they get over looked every round? What about those players? Yes, they feel like crap. They feel slighted and get upset, "Why didn't they pick my match? Do they not think I'm good enough to be on the stream?"

Then let's say for some reason the not-so-top players happen to get to play their match on a stream table. Three things happen: the inexperienced players get super nervous and their game doesn't show up on the stream, or they don't want to play on the stream because it's too much pressure. Or what's even worse, the crowd in the chat room starts to complain about the players who miss badly or can't play. "Why are they on the stream? Get such and such instead. I wanna see some good pool."

While the newbies will get amazing experience handling pressure on a stream table, it still doesn't help the crowd who are sitting in front of their computers. They want to see big names; people they know.

So the TD's go back to putting the top-ranked players on the stream. And then toward the end of the tourney, you see the same faces through the final day. Some times, you could see the same player in several stream matches if they are on the one-loss side for a long time.

Granted, most of us wouldn't care if it was Jeannette Lee or Raj Hundal, but other times it will be with players we don't care to see 5 times in a row.

Everyone thinks streaming is awesome... and easy. It's not. It creates a lot of complaints and concerns and bitching and moaning.

People should appreciate free streams, instead, the audience gets upset about who is on the table and why they are on the table, and the players get upset if they aren't on the table, or if they are on the table.

Where are the happy people? lol.

Seriously,I'm just trying to point out a few of the "kink"s that can associate streaming matches. This isn't anything new. Even TV has to decide which tennis matches of Wimbledon they will show. We aren't alone. This isn't anything new.

It's all politics and ratings.

Wear something sexy or shoot well. That will help! lmao!

Don't Judge

2011-09-08T12:29:00.001-05:00

One of my friends was playing in a tournament this past weekend and in this particular match, she was playing a girl I will call "Classy."

And after my friend lost that tough match to Classy, someone comes up to her and says "You don't like your opponent, do you?"

It through my friend for a loop.

"What? What do you mean?"

They went on to say they could tell she didn't like Classy but they understood though, because Classy was "Snooty" anyway.

"What??", again was her astonished reply.

This person was telling my friend that Classy always walks around the table like she's better than everyone else and hardly talks to anyone in the pool room.

My friend immediately defended Classy.

"We are friends and she is super, super nice. You should get to know her." Then went on to explain she simply played bad, and she was upset at herself, not that she didn't like Classy.

When my friend told me about this exchange, I got upset.

I said, "How can they put you in such a bad spot? Further, why say something so rude about someone they (obviously) don't know?!"

I told my friend I was so glad she defended our friend, Classy, and also reminded her that Classy was shy and that's why she comes across as "Snooty" to some people. When I was in my 20s, I was very shy and people thought I was bitch, when in reality, I just wasn't social or talkative. So I understand completely what Classy has to deal with.

While I didn't like what they said about Classy, I also VERY MUCH did not like the position my friend was put in by having to defend her.

I really don't think people realize that when they badmouth someone, or offer their two cents, what it does to the person they are speaking to. It puts them in an uncomfortable position, which is really unfair to the person on the receiving end of the "opinions."

However, at the same time, I am GLAD they said something because my friend was able to share that indeed this "snooty girl" is one of THE nicest girls in pool and one of the dearest friends anyone could be lucky enough to have in their life.

Don't judge, people. It looks really bad on you.

Mental Mush

2011-09-07T15:06:00.000-05:00

You'd think I wold have remembered this from my previous experience of when my Dad passed - that my mental game is mush after death/stress.

I painfully remembered the hard way this past weekend at the Texas Open. And guess what? It SUCKED!

I played and won my first two matches. I'm suppose to win; I did. I played pretty sporty most of the time in those two races to 7. I knew heading into the tourney I was playing decent, so that vote of confidence always helps. I also love the fast 9-foot tables with decent-sized pockets. I can let out my stroke and move the cueball around the table like I own it. It's a GREAT feeling!

After the first match, I bawled like a baby. As soon as I won, the immense pain of losing my Mom just 2 weeks before hit me like a ton of bricks. I wished so badly I could call her and hear her voice to tell her I won. ;(

In my 3rd match, I didn't play good, my opponent played better, and I had too much on my mind anyway to really focus on the task at hand. So, I was on the one-loss side now.

Me, cooling off with one of the fans inside Skinny Bob's Billiards.

That night, I stayed up with friends instead of going to bed at a normal hour to be fresh enough for my 1pm Monday match. In the morning, I was upset at myself b/c I didn't get enough sleep and because I felt so exhausted. But a friend convinced me I have played tired before and to just prepare myself for the match. I listened to the words and by the time the match started, I felt GREAT!

I played good, too :)

Well...... sorta.

I won the first game and was running out BEAUTIFULLY the 2nd game but missed the 8. 3rd game I again was shooting well but miss the 9 in the side pocket. I got upset. I miss another out and am down 4-1.

I am so dang mad, I go outside to take a break.

But because my mental game is on vacation, I don't know how to handle what is going on in front of me. I don't know I am thinking down on my shots and to stop it. I don't see I'm actually too confident, and have stopped focusing on my pre-shot routine. I don't realize I need to just have fun and accept what is going on (that takes the pressure off). I'm not capable of not being angry at giving the games away. I'm just not mentally tough right now. I honestly think if I wasn't so stressed and going through so much, I would have been more aware of how to change my attitude and composure in time to win more games.

Instead, I got more and more angry at myself and pissed I was giving the match away. I decided I wasn't going anywhere - I wasn't giving up. But I missed a bank at one point, didn't play safe another, and dogged a tough 9ball to make the score and 5-6 instead she won 7-5.

I like my opponent a lot, but I did NOT like I didn't give her a good fight. I think even she would prefer us both playing well.

Then I see the payouts and I was one round away from the money. I normally don't care about the cash, but that would have been cool to place in the Texas Open again.

And I'm gonna tell you all something: I'm TIRED of ending my runs at the Texas Open with stupid, bad play. Tired of it. I can't remember a year that I gave my best the final day. Instead, I'm always tired, exhausted, or other distractions are going on. One of these years I will get enough sleep and put the tourney first.

I miss you, Mom.

Tourney Descriptions Sucked.

In or Out?

2011-08-30T15:40:00.015-05:00

Last night I went to league with my boyfriend so I could get out of the house. Due to my Mom's passing, I don't like to be alone there, so I tagged along and was the Official Score Keeper for the night.

We went to a shady side of town, to a pool room I had never been to before. It was really a very small bar with four coin tables. It had a dozen regulars there and the two pool teams, and not much room for anything else. When we pulled up, it was kinda in a strip mall, but I didn't see any other stores or businesses and some diesel trucks were using the parking for overnight stays.

I admit it was a scary atmosphere in and out of the bar. I am sure everyone is always very nice but being a white female with blond hair, I do stand out in my slacks and blouse, lol.

Right before the first game, it dawned on me that my cue was in the car.

Yikes!

I asked my boyfriend, and his teammate overheard my question, "I left my cue in the car. Should I go get it and bring it in so it doesn't get stolen?"

The both look at each other and laughed as they look around and said almost in unison, "heck, we could get robbed in here!"

LMAO!

My Momma

2011-08-29T17:50:00.000-05:00

My beloved Mom who had been struggling with emphysema for the last four years passed away on August 19th.

Her breathing became much worse over the last three months and she was struggling every day to "catch her breath" as she would say.

On August 16th she slipped in our home in the kitchen and broke her hip. That was a Tuesday. On Wednesday she had successful hip replacement surgery. On Thursday she had complications. On Friday I had to put her in hospice and she passed away with me by her side that night at 9:45pm.

She told me I was the love of her life. She was mine as well.

The last week and a half have been the hardest of my life. But my friends and loved ones are keeping me going. I am blessed to have so many friends who truly care for me, as it was only my Mom and I. I cared for her the last 4 years and we were best friends.

I appreciate you all more than you know. The kind, loving, and encouraging words I have received and keep receiving are the only reasons I have been able to endure this extremely tough time.

I will miss her FOREVER.

I wanted to share a few things with you.

A blog entry I wrote on my personal blog about ensuring you know the wishes of your parents, and also the difference between being an only child or one with siblings during tough times: http://personallymeonline.blogspot.com/2011/08/only-child-or-siblings.html

My friends held a Celebration of Life for my Mom and I on August 28th and I wrote a "speech" so I could share some wonderful memories about my Mom: http://personallymeonline.blogspot.com/2011/08/speech-for-my-mom.html

And finally, I also wrote about a crappy experience with the funeral home you can read if you have time: http://personallymeonline.blogspot.com/2011/08/funeral-home-blues.html

Mom's obit:

Toni J. Leach Bailey died peacefully in Fort Worth, Teas on August 19, 2011 after a long illness. She is survived by her daughter, Melinda Gayle Bailey, the love of her life. She will be cremated and her ashes scattered privately.

In lieu of flowers, you are welcome to pick one of Toni’s favorite causes to give to (http://www.savethemanatee.org/ and http://www.elephants.com). Most of her life revolved around animals and a small donation from a friend would be her fondest desire.

We miss her more than we can say

Change Please?

2011-08-17T13:22:00.056-05:00

At the beginning of one of my recent straight pool matches, I needed change for a $20 so I could tip the waitress a dollar for my free water and also have a five dollar bill for my league dues. The new waitress pleasantly obliged.

I would find out later from one of the regular waitresses that my waitress thinks I'm mad at her.

What? Why?

OMG. Really?

I barely spoke to her and didn't order anything but a water so far. Yea, and I'm losing my straight pool match badly, but I didn't take it out on her. I didn't SPEAK to her.

Wow.

Later on that night after dinner and a few drinks (yes, I was very pleasant to her), I gave my waitress a hundred dollar bill to pay my nights' tab. (Can you tell I just came from a casino over the weekend - I had no small bills!)

I didn't know what my total was, as I gave her the hundred before I saw my tab and simply told her "Can I pay my tab please?" She comes back over and lays down "the change" and says "Thanks, Melinda, hope your night gets better."

I sit there a few minutes jabbering with a couple of friends and decide to count my change. And the amount of money sitting in front of me is $100. Yep, change for $100. Four 20s, a 10, a 5 and five 1s.

What?

I call the new waitress over, "um, I wanted to pay my bill with the hundred."

"You did," she replies back to me.

"But I have $100 in change here. "

She stands there, just looking at me.

So I count the money out for her so it makes more sense, "20, 40, 60, 80, 90, 95, 96, 97..."

"Oh, ok, I'm sorry! I'll be right back."

Of course my friends are watching this show down.

She comes back and tells me my bill was $41. So she puts my change down on the table and I pick it up to count it.

And now I'm $5 short. I'm confusing myself. Let's see, 100-41 is ? Yep, I only have $54 in front of me.

I call her back over, "Um, you still owe me $5."

You aren't going to beleive this, but I have to count the money again in front of her to prove I'm now $5 short, when I just helped her by not just taking the $100 "change."

She gives me the $5 and apologies yet again and adds, "this is my first mistake, I am so sorry."

Huh? Really?

I'm thinking to myself, "damn, you're a lucky woman then." Even tho it's obvious she made a few mistakes this night just with my change.

One of the guys sitting at my table tells me, "she's fortunate you are honest or that you didn't just put the "change" in your purse or else she'd be out $41."

I suppose so.

I'm picking on this new waitress with this blog and I'm sure she will be great in the long run but don't be nervous around me. I'm a good patron. We'll figure this out together.

Emotionally Spent

2011-08-16T13:22:00.004-05:00

Although out of my element, I wanted to write this vulnerable post with you to show that bloggers don't always write about what really goes in in every day life. I'm being very open below.

I had a tough straight pool match planned for last night (Monday, August 15th). I tried to watch my friend Mike's instructional video on Friday but was distracted at work to really pay attention again. It's chalk-full of great advice and only about 30 minutes long (see below). I wanted to prepare myself for my match with The Toughie so watching vids was perfect.

50/84 Instructional Video from Michael Grosso on Vimeo.

Then over the weekend I thought it was crucial I play in an 8ball tourney that was held at the pool room I would have my straight pool match. But I didn't fair so well in the tourney Saturday night and didn't practice like I yearned to do.

Come Sunday, and as things in life sometimes happen, I had a hiccup in my current relationship. That led to huge amount of hours laying awake Sunday night with endless worry.

By the time I arrived at work Monday morning and sat down in my chair, that's when it hit me just how physically exhausted I was. Then throughout the day, I wondered and worried about my relationship. Yes, this is what females do.

Since I was so physically exhausted, I decided I should try to take a cat nap at work, but how does one do that in a cubicle environment anyway? So instead, I pulled up another GREAT video to watch to get prepared for my match with The Toughie.

14.1 Qualifier, Bob Cozzolino, IL vs Lou Figueroa, Commented by George Fells and Freddy the Beard.

This video runs a little long because it's a great match, but George Fells provides SO much wonderful advice and excellent instructional gems, I wanted to watch it again and also try to watch it til the end. But was it smart to watch it RIGHT before my match?

And, I was SO tired. So mentally and physically exhausted from lack of sleep and stress from numerous things the last few weeks. I also received calls all day from my Mom who was having a bad day and was very depressed and not feeling well.

I had to meet up with my b/f right before my match b/c I had his cues and he had league. I wasn't sure how it would go. Hadn't talk to him all day, wasn't sure if we were "okay" or not. On the 15 minute drive over there, my hands were sweating, my arm pits weren't doing any better, I had a rapid heart rate. I was a mess and very nervous about the unknown of the almost near future ahead of me.

When I showed up, he immediately hugged me, told me to stop crying, and that we were okay. The immediate outpouring of relief was very emotional and draining for me. I can't begin to even describe it - I for some reason cried all the way to the pool room (yes, only minutes before my straight pool match).

Because I have been going through so much stress lately with a lot of things (not just this hiccup), I should have canceled that match, but the guy had already moved some appts around to meet up with me. So I felt obligated.

But, the build up of stress causes a lot of crazy things to happen to a person. As Wiki tells us, this includes poor judgment, a general negative outlook, excessive worrying, moodiness, irritability, agitation, inability to relax, feeling lonely, isolated or depressed. It can even cause physical symptoms of diarrhea or constipation, nausea, dizziness, chest pain, rapid heartbeat. And of course stress can cause the other "side effects:" eating too much or not enough, sleeping too much or not enough, social withdrawal, procrastination or neglect of responsibilities, increased alcohol, nicotine or drug consumption, and nervous habits such as pacing about, nail-biting, and neck pains.

I can pick out 75% of the above for just myself the last few weeks.

So, I had been emotionally overextended and exhausted with both physical fatigue and a sense of feeling psychologically and emotionally drained. That was not a good combination to play The Toughie.

And yep, I couldn't play.

Doesn't help The Toughie already plays well and shouldn't be in my division.

He made comments at the get-go: "we'll definitely need a clicker counter because of my opponent" (implying I would have high runs) and "I don't care if I win or lose" (really?? then let me win so I can get the top shooter and that coveted trophy no one else cares about!!)

My high run was 5, twice. He ran 10, 12, 11, 12, 8, etc. He spanked me 37 to 100.

I tried to stay down, tried to have a smooth stroke, tried to take my time, but I couldn't. I had no emotional energy, physical tact, or drive. I was spent.

Even my league director asked me afterwards, "what happened tonight?"

But it's okay, it's just a game, he is suppose to win.

Plus, life experiences make me stronger. :) I'm a firm believer in that.

Top Ten PoolSynergy

2011-08-15T08:51:00.053-05:00

The lovely Samm Vidal (previously known as Samm Diep) is this month's PoolSynergy host! If I had to give her a title, it would be "THE nicest person in pool." She's a talented, amazing woman and a good, true friend. The only problem is her topic this month is tough! Argh!

She wants us pool bloggers of Pool Synergy to list ten things related to pool, and those ten things have to relate to each other. For example, your 10 favorite ???, 10 reasons why you ???, 10 tips on ???, 10 random pool thoughts???, a list of 10 anything pool-related.

WTHeck, Samm! Give us something easy next time. Sheesh.

You think it's easy?? Try it. I dare you.

I struggled with what ten, relate-able things to share. Well, here it goes:

Top Ten things I Wish I Knew 10-15 Years Ago:

(in random order)

1. Always think three balls ahead. Always. Every shot. I learned this from my friend Shayla Neris who learned this from her coach. I am SO glad she passed this on to me so many years ago!

2. Look at the object ball last.

3. Play straight pool. Your love of pool will go up exponentially.

4. In order to do well in tournaments, you must play in as many as you can. Please hear these words. You cannot learn to handle pressure or learn mental toughness with only a few tournaments a year. You need conditioning over and over in a tournament environment to give yourself the best chance to gain experience.

5. It's okay to take lessons. No one will judge you and your game will improve faster. ;-)

6. Follow through with a smooth stroke and keep your head still. I.e. Condition your pre shot routine! Repeat after me: Condition your pre shot routine. Repeat after me again: Condition your pre shot routine.

7. You WILL get frustrated with this game. You will want to quit numerous times. You wont understand why you can practice so well but not compete in tournaments. It takes experience!

8. Play in tough-a$$ tournaments when you can. Advice from my friend Cristina Dela Garza, Get out of your comfort zone - playing against tougher players in different/bigger/tougher environments makes you tougher and gives you amazing experiences for when you play in your other regular tournaments or leagues.

9. If you focus entirely on your pre shot routine, then that helps your brain from thinking about other things it shouldn't. Try it, you'll like it; I promise. :) This was the best mental advice I ever received for overcoming jitters, pressure, embarrassment, un-confidence, and thinking too much while at the table. Author and friend Phil Capelle taught me this.

10. Play Your Best. If you play your best, you give your best effort, then you should not be upset at yourself if you lose. I learned from Mental Toughness Training for Sports that if I played lazy or didn't give 100%, then I accepted I didn't play my best and this helped me from getting frustrated or depressed about my play.

Well, I hope some of this helps you (or resonates with you), as it helped me all these years become a seasoned, overall good player. Good luck!

What's Going On in Texas?

2011-08-11T15:26:00.001-05:00

Texas is a big state. Have you heard? lol

But, that doesn't mean that a lot of tours don't step on each others toes. Unfortunately.

Let's see what's going on.

Before I continue, let me state that these are my opinions and thoughts only.

The Lone Star Billiards Tour (LST) was formed 2-3 years ago and it held all its stops in Houston. Led by the great Tournament Director and WPBA player, Kim White, the new tour was a smart move on her part - having a tour that held an event 1-2 times a month in the Houston-area drew lots of players, allowed her to make money from entry fees and a percentage of the calcutta, and provided tournament opportunities for the players.

Houston is HUGE and the number of pool players in that city can afford their own tour, to be honest.

Problem was, even though she tried, some of the events conflicted with the OB Cues Ladies Tour (OBCLT) AND the Fast Eddies Tour (FE Tour). While that was a main issue in the beginning, it turned out that wasn't the problem. The problem was, the number of events in Houston a month impacted the outcome of Out-of-Houston Tours. The distance from Houston to other big cities ranged anywhere from 3 to 6 hours. Why would the players in Houston go OUT of TOWN for another Tour if they had one in their own backyard several times a month?

And almost just as important as location, the FE tour and the OBCLT could not have a calcuttas. The fact that the LST could hold calcuttas and the FE tour couldn't, almost automatically caused the LST to receive most of the players. As I wrote about before, turns out calcuttas are very important to the players and the patrons. More so than I ever thought. The FE Tour actually declined so much in attendance, they had to end the Tour in 2010.

And with so many Houston players staying in Houston, both the OBCLT and the FE Tour had lowered attendances.

Further, the WPBA no longer has an incentive for female players to play in regional tours anymore (the OBCLT is a WPBA regional tour). There are no qualifiers anymore and the Regional Tour Championship has turned into a joke. Additionally, with the WPBA hardly having any stops, female players see no future to play on the pro tour right now. If a female player did not want to play on the flailing WPBA, why would they attend the OBCLT stops out of town when there were so many choices IN town each month?

To top if off, ANOTHER tour was started in Houston - an Amateur Tour led by Brent Thomas (now called the Tiger Amateur Tour). This obviously caused some ruffled feathers by the other tour in Houston, but Brent wanted to provide a more open-book tour and also an opportunity for the amateurs to win some money too (Houston has a lot of pros and Master players that dominated the top payouts of the Lone Star Tour).

So, now there's TWO new tours who impacted not just the FE Tour and the OBCLT, but the PLAYERS who play on those tours.

The FE Tour and the OBCLT held stops in Houston. Well, they used to. One of the main pool rooms that hosted the OBCLT was holding too many stops for the Lone Star Tour, so they had to stop having stops with the OBCLT.

And when the FE Tour would have a stop at Fast Eddies Billiards in Houston, hardly anyone would show up because they weren't allowed to have calcuttas or their stop was overlapped by one of the other tours with calcuttas.

The Amateur Tour has cut back from 2 stops a month to about one stop a month (so it seems), but it still draws a great turn out of course. The Lone Star Tour has not only continued with more than one stop a month, Kim has branched out to Austin (and one time to Temple, Texas). That definitely makes the non-Houston-ites happy to be able to play on a tour again.

But with the economy so bad, the OBCLT is having a difficult time finding pool rooms to host an event.

And the male players in the big cities of San Antonio, Austin and Dallas/Fort Worth can't drive to Houston so many times every month, so they look for smaller independent tournaments that happen to have a tourney every once in a while.

I am happy to see that the two new Houston Tours have gained new sponsors and offers more options to the Houston players. That means they are working hard.

The two Tours may not realize it, yet, but their competition with each other brings out new ideas and better tours for the players. The Lone Star Tour now has not only an open, and ladies events, but Kim has added a junior event and an amateur event to her stops. She also has added a one pocket event, and has not just 9ball, but ten ball and eight ball events. The Tiger Amateur Tour now has CSI as a sponsor, and they have qualifiers for CSI tournaments.

The only unfortunate thing I think is going on is there seems there is a new amateur tour run by Kim, separate from the Lone Star Tour. But I can't quite tell what it is.

Like I said, competition creates new ideas and a better tour, but one shouldn't shoot their own foot for spite, either.

Bottom line, there is no longer an Open Tour that travels throughout Texas. The bad economy even prevents the two tours in Houston from branching out to other cities to where the TDs would make enough money to travel outside their money-bounds more often. And why would they when so many pool rooms in Houston hold their events, anyway?

The OBCLT is still traveling across Texas, but not all pool rooms can always afford the $2,000 guaranteed added money. And with the WPBA's lack of involvement, what is the draw for the pool rooms? The ones who host the OBCLT events are mostly the ones who simply love women's pool and want to support it, whether they make money or not. I.E., the love of the game and women's pool. However, the OBCLT has a lot going for them - they are well known and are the largest, longest-running women's tour in the country. Even with two tours in Houston, they are still getting new local players all the time, which is awesome.

But I admit I liked playing in the women's division on the FE Tour. I admit I'd love to play in the women's division of the Lone Star Tour.

And what about the male pool players in Texas? Without a "Texas" tour, there are still a few big tournaments a year in or near Texas, but not enough to satisfy the male players who used to travel all the time once a month or so to compete, test their skills, and try to make money.

Do I have a solution? Do I have recommendations? Sure.

I have ideas. But ideas cost money, and also create a lot of work and time. ;)

But, if you are thinking of moving to Texas for pool, choose Houston right now. Even though Houston is the 7th most congested region in the country, you will be in pool competition paradise.

McEnroe Versus Strickland

2011-08-10T12:42:00.002-05:00

I had a chat the other day with my dear friend Mike L. Mike sees things half empty, I see them half full. He would say he see things as they are, not half empty. ;)

He loves picking on me, and I him. My favorite response to him is “WTFever.” LMAO. We have fun with each other.

This one day he says to me, “By the way if I paypal you 10 bucks will you stop using the McEnroe cliche' ?”

“Why can’t I use him?” I ask back.

Michael: Because it's apple and oranges.

Me: Why? Explain it to me, please.

Then I added, “if your explanation changes my mind, ie made sense, then I think I will share that on my blog. I can stand corrected, and have a different perspective, if it convinces me ;)”

Then Mike shares his thoughts on why I should stop saying “what is the big deal about Earls’ “antics”? They are just like John McEnroe’s, and McEnroe didn’t hurt tennis. So why are people complaining?”

Michael: At that time, tennis was one of the biggest sports going. Millions upon millions of people watching. Pool a hundred people watching.

McEnroe had classic “me against him” matches that people followed. Bjorn, Connors etc. Earl not really.

In the media and in promoted tennis, McEnroe had personality and was smart and promoted the game in general with kids and parents etc. Earl does none of that.

Earl attacks everyone in the house. The other player mostly. The fans. And lastly the ref. McEnroe went after the ref. Not the other players, not the fans.

McEnroe gave lots of money to charity. McEnroe gave thousands of corporate outings for the biggest companies in the world. He was sought after by everyone to come to their place to entertain. Earl not so much.

If McEnroe were to get thrown out of a match because of his antics with the ref, a hundred million dollars could be lost from advertisers and networks. If Earl gets tossed, nothing is lost.

In every way, McEnroe was way more important to tennis than Earl. And as a smart guy, he promoted the hell out of the sport. Earl, uh, no.

Me: I differ on one fact. Brad Gilbert talks about McEnroe giving players hell, tho.

Michael:Quite possibly. But you didn't see it on tv in every single match.

Me: True

Michael:Two entirely different situations. Pool is a street game that needs help with building it up. Tennis was accepted and one guy came along and was different and grew the sport all by himself.
McEnroe had charisma.

They both won U.S. Opens, though. And both were the best at what they did at their time. That's all I can see.

Me: hmmm.

You are saying McEnroe grew the sport himself, even though it was already accepted?

Michael: I'm saying he grew the sport because he brought in a lot more people because of him and his personality and the rivalries that were created. Before him it wasn't as colorful as sport. More country club white clothes sort of thing. He changed tennis. Even if he was personally an a$$ on the court with refs and sometimes players, he overcame it by being smart and charismatic and by endlessly promoting the sport. Promoting the sport may be the biggest single thing pool culture doesn't get. For some unknown reason Pool Pros think they need to get paid to lift a finger to help the game they benefit from.

Me: Doesn't Earl ask to be paid for his appearances? I know he gets paid for them.

Michael: Sure.

His appearances get a low turnout though. What do you suppose McEnroe would have drawn if he showed up at a regional tennis tournament? Even now?

People still pay good money to watch a 50 something McEnroe play a 50 something someone else. Don’t think you can compare the two.

McEnroe was one of top 10 most well known people in the world. You can’t find 10 people in your local league who even know who Earl Strickland is.

So compare Earl with someone from curling or something.

Me: lol. WTFever.

Michael: End of rant. Really the bottom line is here: McEnroe draws thousands, Earl draws 10.

Me: But if pool was mainstream like tennis?

Michael: But it isn't. Pool is a game. People aren't interested. Pool people gotta get that out of their head. There is no demand for professional pool. And I know you don't believe it but it's worse because of people like Earl. Apples and oranges.

Me: Apples. Oranges

Michael: You create popularity for a game by hard work. And the people who are going to benefit should be doing most of the promoting work. In this case they won't.

And then the people doing the work have to have great charisma. Then it has to be interesting for a spectrum of people to watch. Then people need to want to buy tickets. Sports like football, tennis etc have all passed that test. Pool, no. So it's not comparable.

Me: That’s why Jeanette Lee is famous. She can work a crowd. Just like John Schmidt can work a crowd.

Michael: Pool has a bad case of not knowing what they don't know.

Me: Apples. Oranges. But Earl still is one of the greatest rotation players of all time. You can't take that away from him. :)

Michael: Very True.

Mike makes a lot of good points, and now I understand why he doesn't think I should compare Earl's and McEnroe's "antics." Hey Mike, I'll take that $10 via paypal now. ;)

Hand Made Glove

2011-08-07T11:40:00.000-05:00

I always like going to the 24 hour pool room to watch my boyfriend gamble. Last night he played for 10 hours straight. We came up winner this time, which always feels good. He played real good and was ahead right away but then it went back and forth before finally winning the final set ten hours later.

They played from 430pm to 130am. When we first arrived at the pool room, only a few tables were taken by the afternoon delights who wanted to get out of the heat and spend some quality time with their friends. Come 9pm to midnight, tho, the crowd certainly changed from the day weenies to the "let's go out and get drunk and let me show you I can play pool" crowd.

But, I don't mind the clientele at all and usually I find some photo opportunity for my blog. ;)

Tonight was no exception. The guys to the left of my boyfriends' table were kinda oblivious to the match next to them. One of our friends tried to explain to them to be aware if they get in the way because they were gambling next to them.

"Really?"

"Yep."

"For Money?"

"Yes."

"Like how much?"

"A few hundred."

"No Way!"

"Yes... "

So, they tried to stay out of the way after that. But then one guy caught my eye. He was using a napkin in his bridge hand!

To some people they may laugh at the guy, but not I. I was impressed! Here is this weekend warrior that recognized the house cue was sticky and the cue would flow better through his hands if he used a napkin.

I grabbed my phone to snap a few photos to capture this smart guy!

Learning From APA

2011-08-04T15:29:00.001-05:00

Yes, folks. This die-hard-BCA-only league player has joined an APA league. I joke now, "I went to the dark side." lol.

Actually, it's not so bad. It's a Master APA League. We play one person each Sunday evening on a team of three.

It's a weird race - whoever gets 7 wins first, wins. You have your choice to play 8ball or 9ball. But, there are only 5 games of 8ball and 7 games of 9ball. So, most of the time you have to play both 9ball and 8ball to get the 7 total wins in.
So, what am I learning, you ask? What am I learning from APA?

Well, to be fair, I'm not technically learning from the APA itself, but I AM learning something about myself and others by being on this APA Team.

My team captain has always been an acquaintance, not a friend per se, but now I feel like she is a friend. We have spent just a few Sunday evenings together and already I know her better through great talks and sharing.

I have written about this woman before, but as a competitor. I stated she was tough to play because she's intimidating and also vocal. When she misses a shot or safe she talks out loud ("way to give it up") or to her opponent ("there ya go, all open").

I mentioned in a previous blog that I felt she turns up the heat so much, if she could squeeze your balls while she played against you, she would. She's that's intimidating.

Turns out, tho, not only is she a great woman, she really IS that way. She told me when she plays guys she turns up the competitive factor. She even stated she figuratively thinks to herself she wants to rub her opponents d1ck in the dirt. I kid you not. She shared with me she once put something that looked like the male anatomy in a shoe box with dirt around it as "inspiration" for her teammates and to alarm their opponents one time ina big league tournament. To hear her describe this "show and tell" was hysterical!

But, I have also seen another side to her. Yes, she's aggressive and intimidating on the table, but she is also a mother, a great wife, and a good friend to a lot of people. I can also tell she gets a tad bit embarrassed when she misses, stating out loud "big dummy, you hit that bad." I recognize that most people do that as a defense mechanism, and even though she is intimidating, it doesn't mean she doesn't feel any different.

I've so much enjoyed being around her. Getting to know about her kids, her great husband, and to see her kindness for her dear friends.

Although she can be tough to fade if she's not on your team (she cheers loudly for her teammates' good shots "nice shot!" or she can be kinda rough when she talks about an opponent "he wont get out") but otherwise, it's a completely different scenario for me to be around - a woman with a vocal killer instinct.

Being around someone with such a hard killer instinct is something in of itself. I will continue to learn little tidbits from my new friend. :) Obviously it wont be as extreme as her thinking, but my soft side and too-nice attitude could use a little toughening up and in this APA league I may be the little grasshopper. :-)

Bantering at League

2011-08-03T14:51:00.001-05:00

I went to a league match on Monday night to watch my b/f play in his new league. I know most of the guys on his team, but one guy I just recently met (Big Billy) and two more I hadn't hung out with before. Turns out they are a pretty lively group of guys. So, even though I was kinda a newbie, they made me feel right at home by joking with me and being funny.

Two of the five teammates are super quiet and the other three (including my b/f) are really funny. I noticed right away they bantered with each other and they would playfully make fun of each other. We laughed a lot!

I helped them out by taking score and sat there with a few beers and laughed for a couple of hours along side them.

At one point, the other team subbed a guy in, named Luiz. He lived life to the fullest, smiling a lot, high-fiving and yelling out after great shots for not just his own teammates but his opponents, as well. He made quite an impression on all of us.

Our team was winning 9-0 (it's a real strong team) and my b/f had to play Luiz. Btw, Luiz has only one arm. He also didn't have his own cue and used a house cue.

As my b/f is running out, one of the balls skids on him and Luiz gets to the table with a tough 4 ball out in front of him.

As Luiz is taking his time one shot at a time, one handed, one of the funny guys on our team (Big Billy) leans over and tells me, "If your b/f loses this game, I'm gonna give him a lot of $hit."

I giggled to myself, thinking my b/f would get a kick out of it because they all take $hit from each other.

So Luiz continues his tough run and gets out. After Luiz wins, he's yelling and shouting and high fiving my b/f (even gave him a hug, lol).

And I'm sitting there ready for the banter! I'm ready to hear Big Billy's funny remarks to my b/f!

Well, BB doesn't say any thing to him.

Hmmm.

So I piped up and get bold and say to him, "I can't believe you lost to a guy who plays with a house cue."

"Shut up" he says quickly to me as we both laugh.

I hoped that would allow BB to pipe up next. But, he didn't!

Then I felt a little funny, bantering all alone, lol.

After a few games, BB sat next to me and I asked him, "um, I thought you were going to pick on him for losing?"

He quickly replies, "I can't do that yet. I haven't played Luiz. If I make fun of him now, and then I lose, he's going to give it back to me worse!" LMAO.

Good point!

LOL!

They are smart banterers!

Two Stroke, No Joke

2011-08-02T19:34:00.000-05:00

I played in a scotch doubles tournament with my boyfriend two Saturdays ago. Yep, we were suppose to win it. Yep, we did. :)

Race to two 8ball on bar tables is brutal, but we only had 2-3 hill hill matches.

We played really, really well together again and we both played smart. It's pretty cool to be able to talk about shots before and after without judgement or criticism. He doesn't ever say anything rude - he words suggestions well. It also helps that I am accepting to talk about run options, I admit. :)

After the scotch doubles finals, we were able to make it in time to play at our regular weekly Saturday night 8ball tourney. I was playing well still but every once in a while I would miss a critical shot.

My boyfriend told me after a tough miss, "you just two stroked that shot."

"What? Really? I didn't think I had at all."

I was very surprised when two games later he said it again, "you two stroke that shot, too."

OMG! I had no idea. I hadn't even realized I was doing that!

So I started to take a few more strokes on my shots. Obviously, I do not have a solid pre shot routine because sometimes I stroke several times and other times I two stroke it.

Once I started to take my time on my shots, I of course made more balls. I am now trying to do that more and it has been very helpful.

Also - allowing my body to be still while stroking the cueball feels amazing. It truly is a euphoric feeling. Have you felt that? Have you felt how awesome it feels to NOT move anything but your arm until the ball drops in the pocket? Have you felt the euphoric feeling, too?

I hate to ask that, but I promise you I didn't feel that for the first time until about 3 years ago. And I have been playing for 20 years.

So, staying down, smooth stroke, taking my time, looking at the object last, is a very complicated process that (imo) is tough to repeat every shot. But if you can muster it even half of the time, you WILL see results.

Surprising Straight Pool Match

2011-08-01T16:24:00.001-05:00

I played my 4th straight pool match of the season on Saturday afternoon (July 30) at 3pm.

I didn't get a lot of sleep the night before (played poker late) and also had a lot on my mind, which kept me from going back to sleep when I woke up Saturday morning. The mind is very selfish and is a rude conjurer. So, sometimes I can't turn my brain off. :(

I know in my heart I am playing well right now (which feels great, btw) but it doesn't mean I still show up every time I play pool. But, I know after a few tough months (maybe I was in a rut?) that I am now CAPABLE of playing well. But with lack of sleep and too much crap on my mind, how would I play?

I played a new guy and so I didn't know how to gauge him before hand, lol.

He was a tall slender, older man, with white-ish hair. For his age, he stood very tall and didn't slouch at all. He moved around the table like a cat, too. He was slick, calm, collected, and confident.

He made some "funny" comments in the very beginning of the match that rubbed me the wrong way, but since I didn't know him I wasn't sure if it was dry humor or if he was really kinda rude. I just dismissed the comments and didn't want to worry about them.

I lost the lag, scratched on the break, and was down -1 right off the bat. He missed his first shot, but left the cueball in the stack. I was so nervous he was going to respond rudely to me if I fouled, that I barely hit the cueball and barely touched the five ball I was trying to make. I sat down and merrily and embarrassingly said, "At least I hit it."

But then he tells me "you didn't hit a rail." I sat in my chair kinda confused, trying to rewind in my mind what just happened.  Indeed he was correct, and so I was down -2. He then tells me, "I want you to go backwards." He said it without smiling or laughing. Again, was that dry humor or was he being rude?

He then ran 15. Ouch. -2 to 15.

He played good though. Got out well, shot well, made balls well.

Then I made two balls and he ran another 9. Down 0-24.

I was able to run 8 and now I'm only a 3rd down (because it's now 8 to 24).

I then ran 6 and I'm only down ten (15 to 25). Whew! BUT.... he returned with a 20 ball run! Twenty! Major ouch! I'm now down 15 to 45. :(

Holy cow.

I make 5; then 3; and miss. It wasn't my first miss, but that one pissed me off. I kept leaving shots for him and it frustrated me to no end because how can I catch up if I keep missing AND leave him a shot with wide open tables? Ugh! As I went to the bathroom to wash my hands (it was sticky in the pool room and I had to wash my hands several times) I pumped my fist in anger. I was mad.

When I came back, he ran 7. Down 26 to 53.

I don't know why I wasn't nervous or felt pressure to be down so much.

At this point I tell myself to just play well when I get a chance at the table. I may not win, but I am going to fight (dang it!) and not give up. I tell myself also to focus on staying down on my shots. Take my time, like I had been in the past few weeks that helped me climb out of my rut.

He goes for a risky side pocket shot from the stack and misses and leaves a wide open table. I don't know why he risked that. Not sure - I guess he thought for sure it would go, but such a risky shot no matter how far ahead is not good, imo.

I then run 16. ME! Not him. Down only 42 to 65.  I feel a little relieved. I'm not gonna lose badly, lol.

I look over at my boyfriend and smile real big and mouthed "sixteen" as he smiles back.

But my opponent makes another little run and goes up 45 to 75. I can't believe it! But, if I keep missing and also leaving shots, then it makes sense, right?

Then I make a few balls and also have a little run of 6 and I'm down only 53-78.

At this point, I figure out how many racks he will need to win. He needs 22 points, so that's at least two racks. I tell myself to just try to keep picking away at balls to slow him down from reaching 100. My goal now is strictly PREVENTION. Try to prevent him as long as I can from reaching 100 by taking away enough balls in each rack to force another rack.

I then run 15. Score 69 to 81.

Then I run 3, then 5, while he scratches a couple of times or only runs two balls at a time. I play safe by hitting the side of the rack and I tell him, "That's a foul. I didn't hit a rail."

He was so immersed at the score sheet, he didn't reply to my comment. Instead he tells me matter-of-factly while he puts down his pen, "well, now you are ahead. I was winning by a lot, but now you are ahead by one."

Score 81 to 80. Me.

Huh?

Really? I'm ahead!?

I didn't show my excitement to him and instead I reminded him dryly, "I didn't hit a rail."

He replies, "I thought you did."

He walks to the table for his shot, and I look at the ball layout and *know* I didn't hit a rail. I tell him, "I'm taking a point off, I didn't hit a rail."

He replies to me pretty perturbed, "whatever you want to do."

Really? Well, I want to take the foul, buddy.

I again look over at my boyfriend and smile with HUGE excitement and mouthed "score tied" but of course he has no idea what I am trying to say, lol. Still, I'm ECSTATIC!

My opponent plays safe. I make two balls but then scratch. He runs 6. Dang it - he's getting closer to 100. Down 80 to 86.

He plays safe but accidentally leaves me a shot and says out loud, "that wasn't very safe." And, it wasn't - I got a shot and then run 11.

Eeeek! I'm up 92 to 86.

He counters with a 7 ball run but misses a tricky shot right before the break out. He has left a great break out ball for me (which would have been perfect for him, obviously). I manage to make the break ball nicely (I swear I didn't feel nervous or pressure for some reason, and I only concentrated on making the ball) and I opened the stack and ran 8 to win 100-93.

OMG! Really? I was down 45 to 75 and somehow just won? WOW!

I wash my hands and when I get back my boyfriend tells me, "He just told me he's mad, because he was ahead by so much and ended up losing."

I am very proud of myself for not letting my emotions completely ruin the match. I got upset at times and frustrated with myself, but I also convinced myself to just play well when I got to the table. I didn't play catch up or felt pressure at any time, which I don't know why but it felt good. I think just accepting I might lose but to also remind myself to play well when I could get to the table, kept the pressure from building.  For some reason I remained calm and was never nervous or scared to lose. Embarrassment never entered my body, either.

I am trying to explain what happened, but I'm not really sure I am doing a good job, lol. But, in 2 of the last 4 matches, I had been down by 30 and came back and won with the same attitude - I cared about playing well, even tho I was down. Trying TOO hard to overcome a deficit is a detriment to my game. But that is difficult to control or remember in the midst of battle. I admit I was lucky tho, I just wanted to FEEL my body playing well. There is no better feeling than staying still while shooting balls in. I yearned for that feeling so badly, I just started to concentrate on that instead of the score or how much I wanted to win.

Damn I wish I would have done that my first match when I lost 100-97, then I'd be 4-0 right now in my stats instead of 3-1. Ugh!